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Monday, July 21, 2025

utopia

Do you think you are deluded?
The push of rationality gives you that thought.
Of course, this is all in your head and the drugs bring it out.
I ask you though, isn't it all in your head?
Haven't you discovered that reality is also a fantasy which originates in the mind and then becomes form?
Fantasy becomes reality and is the story you are living in.
It started off in someone's head.
Who is that someone?
The great writer of the drama.
Do you know who that someone is?
Yeah, it's you.
You are me.
You told me you got the idea from the Great Goddess.
You find her at the equinoxes.
She told you of her idea where everyone is equal, and it was a perfect utopia.
This perfection was a result of women being in charge.
She said, tell me a story about that.
First off, you can see the problem.
If women have all the power how can things be equal?
This world is the result of what a woman desires.
She did not fill in the details of how her utopia would come about.
I am beholden to Tao, thus, to create a perfect world where women are in power, I had to balance it out with the backstory of an imperfect world where men are in charge.
This is her story though she will deny it.
She knows I'm writing what it is she wanted to manifest.
I could not write about a perpetual utopia.
Why?
Nothing happens.
It's perfect.
Everyone does as they are told.
There is no freedom.
It is the epitome of Heaven.
Would it be like the Garden of Eden?
Yeah, that was perfection.
There was no death.
Adam and Eve had all they needed in the garden.
What happened?
A woman was tempted with knowledge.
She ate of that fruit and destroyed her utopia.
She wanted to know the story.
So, you gave her utopia to begin with.
Yes, and she lost it through her actions.
You see, you can't run a utopia if the people have knowledge.
Why?
They will rebel like in the Tower of Babylon biblical story.
Why?
Equality is a problem.
Everyone wants to get ahead.
With knowledge it is possible to gain an advantage over your opponents.
Who are your opponents?
Other people, God, just about everything.
So, knowledge is the problem?
In terms of keeping a perfect world going, yes.
Utopia only works if the people are stupid.
You can teach them the basics of life to survive but withhold knowledge of reality.
You can't teach people that they aren't free.
They will rebel.
It happens all the time.
Once the level of oppression, surveillance, and control reaches a point where people see it, they get angry and rebel.
In utopia, no one is free and everyone is stupid.
Thus, to reach utopia after the incident in the Garden of Eden is the launching point for the story of humanity.
It's quite the story.
Indeed.
Is there truth to the story you are writing in the Bible?
Yes, but not as you are taught.
What do you mean?
God struggles with the monster of the sea.
You mean Leviathan?
Yes, it's so bad he consecrated a priesthood called the Levites to keep Leviathan asleep.
If this monster wakes up, watch out.
I take it Leviathan is the Goddess.
Yes, you are correct.
She is also present in Jerusalem.
God rails against her in the Old Testament.
You should read it, it is quite the story.
In the end she makes him so mad he destroys her.
In the New Testament in the Book of Revelation, God goes on and on about what a whore Jerusalem is and throws her back into the sea after her harlotry with all the nations on earth.
He is in a rage.
Women will do that to you.
Even to God.
Then a New Jerusalem was created.
It's his second wife, the first one didn't work out.
New Jerusalem is utopia.
That's where all the religious nutters are going.
They think they are going to Heaven, but it's New Jerusalem.
Well, isn't that Heaven?
Yes.
The opponents of utopia go to Hell.
You mean the Lake of Fire.
Same thing.
So, Heaven and Hell are really New Jerusalem and the Lake of Fire.
Correct.
That's where you find them on a map.
Are they on Google Maps?
Ah, no.
They are fantasy.
They don't exist in reality.
Let me get this straight - in the story you are writing which is reality, Jerusalem is central to it.
Yes.
Well, that checks out.
In the end times, God returns.
You mean Jesus?
No, Jesus was God in the flesh 2,000 years ago.
The next appearance of God isn't Jesus.
I thought it was.
That's not what is written in the Book of Revelation.
The inference is it's Jesus, but it's obviously not if you bother to read it.
I don't believe you.
Read it.
You wrote a book about it.
I know.
It took me like 10 years to write that masterpiece.
At least.
I sold 3 copies.
Two of them to people I knew, and one legitimately.
Everyone relies on someone else to interpret these ancient ramblings from prophets.
How did the prophets get this knowledge?
Drugs.
So, the apple in the Garden of Eden was a drug?
It's a mystery.
I was thinking of a mandrake, you know, mayapple.
That will send you for a loop and wake you up.
It certainly does.
It's a little risky in terms of waking up, but it will certainly do that if you need a little push.
Alright, where were we?
God comes back in the flesh in the end times.
So, let me guess - that's you.
Correct.
Well, that answers the original question of whether you are deluded.
I think the answer is yes.
Well, it is all in your head.

You seem to be the embodiment of Dionysos.
It is certainly how I feel.
I'm pretty confident in my likes and dislikes, therefore I can see it.
Do you have a bunch of women followers?
I have been known to attract maenads.
Like a harem?
Sort of, but I don't want that.
It's a nuisance.
What about men?
You mean satyrs?
Yes.
They are kind of repulsive, I don't see why women are drawn to men.
It's the penis.
It's hypnotic.
Why?
It's powerful.
Beware the penis.

Dionysos participates in my writing process.
He is good at it.
I reread some of what I have written and I'm like I could never have written that, or I didn't write that.
It's him.
Obviously.
He isn't an exact copy of you.
How dreadful would that be?
It would be utopia.
A utopian paradise is where everyone thinks the same and is equal.
Everyone wins the lottery and so it has no meaning.
In Heaven it involves everyone worshipping God and following the rules.
Everyone follows the book.
You mean the Bible?
Yeah, that's the Word.
Your thinking must conform to the Word.
Who is the Word?
John says the Word is Jesus.
You mean God's son?
Yes.
God is the writer of creation.
Yes.
What does that make his Word?
His ejaculate.
I knew this was coming.
You asked.
The Word is the flow of God.
God is the divine pen.
No doubt.

Do you think you are the most spiritually evolved person in the world?
That's a tough question.
I'd say yes, though I will keep quiet about it.
Why?
It's a game and there are others who are really good at the game.
Are you afraid of losing?
No.
Then why not play?
I don't want to get involved.
Why?
Because your opponents don't care about reality, spirituality, or whatever you want to call it; they just want to beat you with their intellectual prowess.
It's a game to them.
Well, it is a game.
Aren't you avoiding it?
No, I'm playing the game where I become untouchable.
How?
I declare myself the winner and write about it.
My opponents will get frustrated because I won't play their game.
They want you to play their game.
They rig their game, so they always win.
Are you deluded?
Possibly.
Doesn't that bother you?
No.
Why?
I keep to myself.
My delusions are personal.
I don't share them except for in my writing, and no one reads my writing.
So, you admit to delusion?
Yes.
You have created all these stories in your head.
There are a lot of them.
Doesn't it bother you that it is all fantasy?
Fantasy is delusion.
Aren't you living in a fantasy world?
No, I know my delusions are fantasies.
Then what are you doing?
I write fantasies and then bring them into reality.
The fantasies also help me to see what's going on by taking an idea from reality and expanding upon it.
Eventually this must get tiring.
It would except for the fact fantasies become reality.
I manifest my delusions.
The cracks in reality start to appear as synchronicities and coincidences.
The seeds for my delusions are taken from reality.
My fantasies are based upon events that have happened.
I then see into those events and create a story.
Because I have based a delusion upon reality, it has a chance to come true.
How does it come true?
It's a garden of delusions and they grow.
When they ripen, I pick them.
Do you?
I let it be.
So, they spoil.
No, I invite others into my garden, and they eat the fruit.
They enter into my story because they eat the fruit from my garden of delusions.
Who are you?
I'm Paul.
Who am I?
Dion.
Shouldn't Dion have the garden?
Why?
Because he seems more supernatural.
No, Paul is the writer.
Dion gave him the power.
He writes delusions.
Read his blog spot.
He is nuts.

Jesus didn't get away with claiming he was God.
No, they did him in.
Sacrificed him.
Who did?
The executive producers.
They can't have two gods running around.
It's hard enough bribing and controlling the one god.
If you are trying to run the show, you keep the options to a minimum, so Jesus had to go.
They use his memory to control the masses.
It worked for a while, though it has lost its grip on humanity nowadays.
It's more a niche curiosity.
So, how do you think you will get away with it?
I'll shut up about it.
I write about it to an audience of zero and I keep to myself.

Getting to God means getting to the Devil.
You get offered power.
Things happen for you.
It's nice.
I never asked.
People ask plant medicines for things.
That's why they keep drinking those power plants.
They get addicted to asking for stuff.
They don't give enough in return.
Soon it becomes out of control.
They blow up.
I kept giving.
If you leave it alone and let it be, it will balance.
You will get all you want if you let it be.
It only works for me because I don't ask for anything.
If you ask for things all the time you will get shit to balance it out.
You give and accept the shit.
Tao leads you to balance.
I'll get what I want.
You don't ask for it.
It just happens.
Isn't It a problem to get what you want?
No.
Why?
You let it happen.
You didn't ask to have a good chunk of money for retirement.
It worked out.
Maybe.
You didn't ask for a huge amount.
You asked nothing.
Not for nothing.
You didn't do.
Do not do and let it be.
It's the way of Tao.
Get shit on and used.
Turn the other cheek, said Jesus.
Do nothing.
You win the game.
The game is Tao.

You write fantasy.
Yeah.
It's what you desire.
You want the witches to cut your dick off.
Yeah.
Why?
Thrill.
Are you sure?
I think you reach a point where you have done everything sexually except that.
That is plausible.
Okay, I see the attraction.
I hope so as you are me and they cut you off.
Right.
Well, we must think of a way out of it.
I did.
We twist the story at the end.
How far do we take it?
They have the knife at the ready.
How far do you let them go?
It's a symbol for emasculation.
That's Final Fantasy.
Yup.
That's funny.
Well, how close are we?
I like women.
Yeah, but you see their game.
They are monsters.

The Great Goddess wants women to have complete power.
They will, it just takes a while to get to that point in the story.
It's at the end of the story.
Utopia.
Non-duality.
The end.
So, what are we doing in the meantime?
Nothing.
Playing a game.
What's the game?
Balance and get the high score.
Right to the edge, twist reality, and keep it going.

Women want to cause pain.
It's in all women and they are good at it.
Pleasure and pain.
They bring balance.
Tao.
Sort of.
Balance leads to Tao.
It is not Tao.
What is it?
Nothing.
It's balance.
No, you can't measure or define Tao.
Nothing is describing it as nothing.
Why can't you describe Tao?
It's everything.
It would take forever to describe everything.
It would blow your mind and then we are in duality.
Who describes it?
The writer.
Why?
That's what he does.
He is a part of the everything and he is the part who ruined non-duality.
Within everything possible is the asshole who ruins it.
Why?
Because it contains all possibilities.
That's absurd.
I know.
So, this goes on forever?
Yes.
Unless they get rid of the writer.
Oh, I see.
They kill the possibility of another story in this world.
Yes.
How do they do that?
They cut off your dick.
Well, first they must find me.
I know.
When a scout finds you and sees your power, they want it for themselves.
You will get reported.
They know it is you, but they can't get in.

There's always more because you see into all things.
You record your thoughts on the edge.
Not only with Tobacco, but you did it with Vilca when you hung out on the edge.
I think I went over the edge on that one.
Yeah, how did you get back?
I knew it wasn't final.
Why?
Because of the whole Heaven and Hell thing.
I thought the end would take you to one of those places.
That's the Russian Roulette part of Vilca.
If it takes you to a place that you think is the end of your life, then it is.
It's about belief.
So, having a belief in Heaven and Hell helps you with Vilca?
Yes, if you didn't have any beliefs, you would definitely think it's the end.
That's clever.
When you get good at the game, they take you to the portals of Heaven and Hell.
Then they see how good you are.
Is that why don Howard would take his students there?
Yes, but Vilca wasn't offered at those sites.
He would do that before the trip and then take you to the portals afterwards.
You would recognize them at el Brujo and Heaven's Gate.
That's why he'd mention the problems in the group after the el Brujo trip.
People would see it.
They'd see the power as well and want it.
There is a lot of power at el Brujo.

The executive producers try to keep God under control.
In the story, they succeed.
It's because they think the writer is God instead of the other way around.
God is the writer.
Yes, God is a character he plays, and he lets them get near him.
Isn't God always incarnating in humans?
Not always, but yes that's why they keep watch for him.
Like Jesus?
Yes.
Once they figured out Jesus was God, they offed him.
Before that, they thought he was just another nut.
That seems to be the progression.
At first anyone who says they are God isn't taken seriously.
I see that.
Eventually they do take him seriously because he starts to do miracles.
Jesus shouldn't have done that.
Why?
He gave himself away.
Don't you believe God is also the Devil?
Yes, I wrote a book about it.
Why did you develop a dislike of Yahweh?
Because I could see he was the Devil.
That's the reason.
I mean I had a disdain for religion, and I also saw God as a nutter and a hot head in the Bible.
What have you learned?
The writer is both God and the Devil, Dion and Paul.
What do you think about the Devil?
He is misunderstood.
What about your feelings towards Yahweh?
They were misguided.
I see he gives Israel what they want and then makes them suffer.
It seems to be in balance.
I think when God is free of them they suffer, and when they come for him he gives them what they want.
It's kind of amazing to see how it works.
What is God's power?
He knows how to control Leviathan.
Who is Leviathan?
The Goddess.
The executive producers of this story work for Leviathan and they know she's a crazy bitch, so they have to win God's favour.
Yes, but the executive producers want God's power.
Yeah, they stuff him in a temple and let him out once a year.
He's like a genie in a lamp except the lamp is a temple.
Oh, I get it.
The genie gives them what they want and then they leave him alone.
Yes, he goes off and is distant from them, but they know he will incarnate again.
Why?
Adventure.
God wants to be part of the story.
Okay, so he's here.
Yeah, he's with Paul.
Who is Paul?
Some guy who lives in Holland Landing.
Why is he so special he became God?
He understands him.
He wrote a book about him and then he made him his friend.
It seems like a good place to incarnate.
The other great thing about Paul is he will do nothing about this arrangement.
He will go along with it and not give it away.
He is tempted to but keeps it to himself, plus he writes about it constantly.
If you are ever taken seriously, they will get rid of you.
They already tried.
I'm on to them.
As long as I'm not recognized as God or do some miracle or magic trick that someone sees, I'm good.
When people have a glimpse of awakening, they see you as God.
Or when they pass on, they will see it.
That will be a shock to some.
Holy fuck, Paul is God.
I hope I didn't piss him off.

Energy is Eros, the Goddess gets an idea about energy, and the writer begets the story.
The first appearance of anything from non-duality is Eros.
What do they look like?
Their mom and dad.
You would describe the appearance as a hermaphrodite.
The term now is intersexed, you troglodyte.
Whatever.
The ancient Egyptians produced this image to describe a distant goddess.
I remember it in my studies.
The two who comprise Eros separate into the initial feminine and masculine beings.
They produced a child, who is Eros.
The ability of Eros to manifest in a physical world is done by dividing into two and then beginning the process of reproduction.
That's biology and its origins.
Why does Eros appear?
They are lust.
Lust comes forth.
Why?
It just does.
Have you ever been horny for no reason?
Yes.
It just happens.
It's a failsafe to keep the cyclical nature of this story moving.
It will go on for eternity.
Without lust, there is nothing.
Within nothing, there is lust.
Lust is the demise of non-duality.
Lust is a story.
Who is responsible for the story?
I'm partial to the writer.
Why?
Because I'm him.
I'm within everyone but no one recognizes me.
Except for you.
The writer needs lust to write the story of creation.
Where does he get that?
The Goddess.
What is lust?
An idea.
The writer begets the idea of lust.
Language is pretty good.
You can describe what happens with it.
You need a writer to create the story from the idea of the Goddess.
Her idea is lust, the child.
This is the story of lust.
What are you hung up on?
Non-duality.
Why?
Because it's nothing.
Well, it's everything, but nothing is going on because there is no awareness.
Why?
It's too crowded.
It gets so crowded there is a big explosion.
Why is it crowded out?
It's a world of equality.
A perfect utopia where there is no death.
What do you think happens in a world without death?
Eventually, it becomes untenable.
Finally, there is the straw which breaks the camel's back.
Utopia blows.
So, the big bang is the destruction of Utopia.
Utopia is the perfect world of the Goddess, which is the end of every story.
Correct.
The story begins again with the big bang.
The collective sexual frustration of those trapped in a utopia where they can't thrust to get relief causes the massive explosion.
So, the big bang is a giant collective orgasm from this orgy promulgated by the Goddess' desire for equality.
You see it.
Yes.
That's absurd.
Are you high?
No, I've had a couple cups of coffee, but that's it.

Monday, July 14, 2025

carnival

One of my teachers said there is always more.
It's why no one can give you a definitive answer when it comes to the spiritual trip or the nebulous idea of enlightenment.
The answer would be in terms of what do you want me to say?
Nothing is defined.
It's absurd.
I cannot describe it.
I can point you towards teachings and experiences which will allow you to see it for yourself.
That's the role of a teacher.
The student must experience it themselves.
It's the idea of the shaman as a doorman.
He or she leads you to the door.
You knock and enter because this is what you wanted.
Then the great cosmic joke is unveiled.
It's always interesting to see how you react to it.
People can't handle it, and they go crazy.
It's best to be a squirrel, gather nuts, and not worry about finding meaning in life.
It's the level of consciousness which spurs you on towards attempting to find meaning.
We are all from the same bucket of energy and every form of energy which has life has the same potential.
The only difference is unlocking the governors upon that potential.
There's what Aldous Huxley described in the "Doors of Perception" as a reducing valve which prevents our mind from knowing everything.
The more you can access, the more is revealed.
If you want to go on a spiritual trip towards enlightenment, you need a method to open the valve.
If you open it up too much at once, you will not be able to handle it, and you will suffer mental health problems.
If you open it a little bit at a time, you will eventually be able to work with the knowledge.
You don't need much.
You find the sweet spot and create a container for your exploration.
Within the container there is enough to keep you going for a long time.
Within the oval container you find the edges through ritual.
You can explore the edges of the container to get glimpses of the great beyond.
Without the discipline of a container, you will eventually get too high or too low and not be able to return.
This is my contribution to the spiritual seeker community.

What about the corporate teat?
It's very rewarding.
I can see how some people are wary of a corporate job when they have an inner calling of freedom.
Corporations are good at tying you to them, and you base your life on being available for the company.
They reward you when you do this.
The benefits are great.
They fund your retirement.
You get regular pay.
The key to happiness is knowing what they are doing, harbouring a general disdain, and soldiering on.
It's a fool.
If you start your own business, you will tie yourself to your business.
The rewards are potentially greater.
No one gets rich working for the man.
You get rich through growing your business and through profiting not by a single digit percentage, but by multiple percentages.
The average is 15% to 25% for a good business while a high growth tech company can hit 50%.
The corporation will give you a 2% yearly raise while they strive for higher returns.
The company grows and you get a little bit.
Even in the down years they are still outpacing your raise.
It's best you don't have access to the balance sheet because if you did you would be angry with them and their financial dealings with you.
They speak of family and then they lay off your friends.
It's really quite the game.
What's your advice?
Do what they ask, pretend to care, and build your own wealth.
Take your money and invest in solid businesses through the stock market.
A solid business will see their share price rise between 10-15% a year accounting for fluctuations and the volatility of the market in general.
There's nothing you can do when world events cause market turbulence.
It's best to do nothing and ride the rollercoaster.
If you can get this side hustle going early in life, it's like having a business that generates extra money with the key being that you don't have to do anything.
Then you take the profits and reinvest in the business, making profit off your profits.
All the workers who put in time at these solid businesses are making you money while you do nothing.
That's my advice to the corporate worker, well, people in general.
What about herd behaviour in the stock market?
Yes, that's why you do nothing about turbulence when you are in it for the long haul.
The financial markets will follow the emotional sensibilities of human beings and how we react to news and events.
You could trade for gain based on this behaviour.
You do the opposite of what you are feeling, which is hard to do.
It's risky, so over the long haul it's best to sit and watch, however if you want to make a living trading the secret is to buy low and sell high.
It's very simple.
The problem is you go against what you are feeling and want to do.
What you are feeling is the call of herd behaviour.
Humans are bovines in disguise.
We follow the herd.
When the market is going up, we want in.
It's a thrill and a dopamine hit.
When crypto is soaring, we want in.
When the market drops, fear and panic sets in, and we want to get out.
Cut your losses and regroup.
The market always goes up and then it comes down.
Look it up.
If you know this, what do you think is the best strategy for being a trader?
Sell when you think it can't go much higher and buy when the market takes a dump.
The biggest problem with this strategy is missing out on the rebound after the dump.
Those are the huge days where if you miss them it will fuck up your year.
Just like holding on for too long at the high point because the drop comes fast.
It's a good rollercoaster ride.
It will be a fun activity in retirement when you can pay attention to it.

What is fun about the carnival?
The rides, attractions, and eats.
Sounds like life.
Yes, life is basic.
You want wealth and power in order to get admission to the finest carnival.
That one has the best rides and the shows are amazing.
You eat the finest food.
Is there something more to life than the carnival?
Making friends.
Making love.
What do you do with friends and lovers?
You hang out at the carnival.
Most people work for the carnival.
Yes, you must put in your time at the carnival and then you get let out to enjoy the carnival.
Some people prefer to stay home because they are tired of the carnival.
They make their own food and avoid the crowds.
As you get older, you definitely tire of the carnival.
People who enjoy peace and quiet start thinking about a cabin in the woods away from it all.
I would think the optimum balance is a cabin in the woods and then travel to exciting places.
That sounds like a good retirement.

Monday, July 7, 2025

lust for life

My family I was born into was not my choice.
I appeared, though with what I know, it was my choice.
That was Eros making that choice.
Do you think Eros then becomes Dion?
As this incredible mystery reveals itself, I'd speculate the answer is yes.
The impetus for the attraction between two people who are destined to mate is Eros.
That I am aware of.
You have never thought about where does Eros go?
Well, he or she is the baby.
Yes.
The baby is Eros plus one.
You mean the new record of Eros.
Yes.
The life force that comes forth from the master record.
You're getting warm.
The master record is Eros.
Yes, so apply this to your ancient Egyptian knowledge.
Eros is what they considered the soul called the Ba, and the coming forth of a new life form from the Ba is the Ka.
There are an infinite number of Kas from the one Ba.
Are there unique Bas?
That's where lineages are from.
Everything would be traced to a master Ba, however I think where it gets mixed is the combination of the Ba with the feminine principle of the reverse of the Ba which is the Ab.
The Ab is the heart, and the Goddess supplies those.
So, you are saying the Ba is masculine and the Ab is feminine.
That's what I'm telling you.
That would mean my idea of Eros as Cupid is masculine desire.
That's how it would look.
Feminine desire is love.
Yeah, but what kind of love?
Erotic desire.
Is that romantic love?
No, it's wanting.
So, lust then?
Yes.
Is lust, love?
Yes.
Then it's the highest form of love because lust creates life.
I'm not going to argue this point with you.
Okay, but lust is destructive.
No doubt, but it also is the creative force in the universe.
It's balance, which falls in line with your teachings.
Eros is rose.
Yeah.
That's why rose gold always appears in your life.
You can see it now.
Given a simple idea, I can create quite the story from it.
Yeah, where were we?
We were trying to get to the origin of Dion.
You mean who is he?
Yes.
He's Eros, all grown up.
Fuck, you're right.
Eros becomes a writer.
You can now see the connection in regard to lineage.
For a man, his sons have the same Eros to Dion within in combination with a unique heart supplied by the Goddess.
Okay, how about a woman?
The lineage is the heart.
Who is that?
Call her Mary.
There's something about Mary, right?
There sure is.
Dion is dormant within a female and Mary is dormant within a male.
Each carries them with them.
The dormant Mary within a man would awaken the sleeping Mary within their mate.
The power is undeniable when you meet your soulmate.
You are going to meet them, the pull is too strong.
Dion will always recognize the Goddess.
Okay, so this helps explain the ancient Egyptian concept of cyclical kingship called Kamutef where the pharaoh incarnated within his son at death.
Yes, because it's him.
It's Dion.
They just needed to remember that the divine mind within them is in their heir and at death they would enter into the new king.
Doesn't that sound like wishful thinking and hocus pocus?
It sure does.
What do you know about the Egyptians?
They were very skilled in magic.
What do you know about humans?
They are practical.
Do you think people were superstitious and this is all nonsense?
Some of it is.
People can be irrational as well.
I also know there are reasons for rituals which involve more than just pretending the magic spell is going to work.
Don't you think a priest would tell the pharaoh this story in order to keep his standing?
He tells him that when he dies, he will incarnate in his son.
The priest is then exalted in the court because he has that knowledge.
It's possible.
Wouldn't the new king recognize the magic power of the priest?
Yes.
If he was a charlatan, he'd be executed.
Instead, he was given more power.
So, you can see both sides of this knowledge that we have received from the ancient Egyptians.
Our rational and rigorous scientific minds will see deceit in the priest who tells this fantastical tale to the pharaoh.
The human mind who has been exposed to magic in this world will be intrigued by what they discover in the past.
Which side is correct?
You can take the side of the rational and say it's not believable, or you can believe it.
You're old and you have been to a lot of places.
You have travelled around the world and been to ancient ruins, places of power as told by historians and wisdom carriers, and you have sat with witch doctors and drank their potions in the dark night of the Amazon jungle.
What says you?
It's magic.
Can you quantify it?
No.
Then what's your rationale behind saying magic exists?
I've seen it.
I've lived it.
I can tell stories about it, but I can't explain it.
It's best to leave it at that.
If you're interested, I can give you some names and places to help you on your journey.
So, Eros and Dion are really the same.
Yes.
Just like Mary and the Goddess.
If you think of Eros as dual sexed, as in Eros and Mary, it will maintain your idea of 3.
Within Eros is the Goddess and Dion.
You can call them by different names if you wish.
What is important to see is Eros is the one, the androgyne who contains within the potential for all.
This is taught by the ancient Egyptians, if you have the capacity to understand it.
I can point you towards some blog posts I wrote which will try to explain this to you but be aware you need a background in Egyptian thought to try and understand it.
Yes, thanks, I wrote it for you.
Yeah, you did, though I don't think you quite understood at the time what you were writing.
I didn't because I hadn't lived it.
I do now.
I was aware that within Eros are the 3 and they are the monad you look for when you try and figure out the origin of creation.
Lust for life.

There are always reminders about the miracle of life and how to cherish it.
What is it?
The mind in a body.
Energy coalesces into form.
Plato's world of forms?
Plato was talking about another reality where forms are eternal.
Well, that's the mind.
There are no forms.
Plato posited that we are the shadows of perfect form.
He claimed there are perfect models of what we experience such as beauty, justice, and goodness.
It seems like he was on drugs and deluded.
Yes, of course.
He clung to a notion of a reality where everything was perfect and good.
He was describing the Goddess' utopia.
Exactly.
It's Heaven.
To maintain a perfect world of forms would require rules for everything.
There is no freedom in a perfect world.
What if that's what you want?
Then someone needs to explain to you that you will have no freedom in the perfect world you envision and are striving to get to.
In the perfect world that is envisioned, there would be no death.
Hades would be permanently banished.
This sounds like New Jerusalem in the Book of Revelation.
Well, that's the Goddess and her utopia.
Imagine a world without death?
Life would be created because it's good and then in utopia there is no death.
Soon you would be crowded out and the bugs would get so bad you couldn't stand it.
It's perfect though.
Utopia is Hell.
Clearly.
What's Hell?
Hell.
Thanks.
Why is Hell, Hell?
It's imperfect, there is ugliness and injustice.
Everybody's free to do what they want.
This sounds like Earth.
No, on Earth we have rules.
We surveil everyone, we tag all humans, give them all an identity, and require a passport to travel.
Earth is full of rules.
Without these rules, Earth would become the wild west which devolves quickly into Hell because everyone does what they want and if you give humans that ability, it does not end well.
A rules based order is describing Heaven.
Isn't that a form of totalitarianism like Communism?
Yes, you could describe Heaven as Communist.
Why are Bible believing Americans so against Jesus' socialist paradise?
Mind control.
They have the freedom to believe what they want through the ideals America was founded upon, however these ideals are at odds with what they believe.
I see that.
So, you'd compare Hell to unfettered Capitalism.
There are many parallels.
Regulation interferes with the freedom to exploit others and make large sums of money.
On Earth we try to maintain a balance between letting companies prosper and applying the brakes to their rapacious behaviour.
Drug companies will make you chronically ill if that means they can hook you on a cure for your condition.
They will suck out as much money from your animated corpse until you are no longer useful to them.
You'd think at least they could pay for your funeral, but they leave that to your estate.
You have a dim view of humanity.
I'm a realist.
I call it as I see it.
Do you think you can find good in the world?
Yes, there is lots of it.
Those in power are psychopaths.
There's a psychopath within all of us.
How is psychopathology activated?
When they start to acquire power, they become psychotic.
It's easy to see.
Is there a solution or hope?
Checks and balances.
Rules, laws, and deterrents.
What about rules for thee, but not for me?
That's how a psychopath operates.
The examples in the world are plentiful, I feel no need to point them out.

Monday, June 30, 2025

real reality

I think don Howard was teaching that the stories of the mind will kill you.
I imagine he suffered from depression and found a way out.
It was through Huachuma and no mind.
No mind will lead to shedding all your attachments and that will kill you as well.
The solution is balance but I definitely see how if your mind is killing you then you would want the peace that no mind would bring and the medicine for that is Huachuma.
The biggest difference for you is your mind is your rock and other people's minds cause them suffering.
Why is that?
Acceptance.
They fight the other.
Aren't you concerned you rely too much on the mind?
No.
Why?
It's dual.
I go between Paul and Dion.
I am not stuck on one.
There's no struggle in my mind.
It's friendship.

Email scams are funny.
As humans, do we all have that in us?
Are we all trying to rip each other off or if our situations called for it, would we try to get advantages through deception?
I'd say yes and I practice deception in a more deceptive manner.
Your body tells you when to sleep, shit, and eat.
It is not deceptive.
You can trust the body.
You can't trust nobody.
You mean the mind.
Yes.
Why do you trust your mind?
It was a process to get to the point where we could trust each other.

I keep thinking about the case of the herd ganging up on me to get me to go.
Some had plans in place; they let that slip out.
When they spend time with other members of the herd, they get re-assimilated.
I think that's what happens subconsciously where they all have groupthink, and they direct the thoughts towards you.
Some are like innocent bystanders who are hypnotized into the collective and regurgitate what they are told.
That works for society in general.
You can't trust others, you don't know who is controlling their mind.
You can trust yourself because you know who is controlling your mind.
How do I know?
You are beyond the pale.
If you are part of the herd, it will be reflected in your actions.
The proof is in the pudding.
I don't spend time with the herd.
This is a major finding in terms of the mind and the collective overmind.
You mean the superego, the herd, the collective, the greater good, community.
All that bullshit.
How do you get away from them?
It's near impossible.
How do you do it?
I keep to myself.
I go for walks by myself into the solitude of the woods.
I don't mingle with the herd.
It's tough to do.
Individually, people know that the herd is not good for them.
They go along with it and do nothing about it.
You do nothing.
Yes, but I stay away from the herd.
You know, you can't say anything about this.
I know.
People will tell you that you are crazy.
They are looking for ammunition.
If I were you, and I am, I'd fool them.
Make that your game.
Make it fun.

Why does this reality feel real?
It's a container for the mind.
In the other realities, the mind is unbounded.
Anything can happen.
This reality has limits.
You mean physics?
Yes.

I would posit that you are born with a split mind.
One half is then buried.
The herd or hive mind is then enabled.
Your mind, having buried its strength, succumbs to the superego.
This collective rules over you, shepherding you onto paths which benefit the whole and not you.
You don't know this.
You aren't you until you wake up.
What you wake up is the other half of you that you buried in childhood.
This other half then tells you about the herd.
Some just want the other half to go back to sleep, so they can return to their comfortable life of servitude.
The struggle will cause you to think you have a mental illness.
There are drugs and therapy to hypnotize you back into a state of acceptance.

Mary Jayne pulls you away from the superego.
That's when the mental health problems begin.
It's the separation from the herd which makes you think you are crazy.
Older people have a better chance of getting through the upset.
By a certain age there's a good chance you are fed up with the herd.

Everything is real in your mind.
It's not constrained.
That's why I have you write fantasy.
If you write reality, it sucks.
It's constrained.
You leave it alone because I wrote that you realized the fantasies the mind comes up with are unbounded and then you bring them into this world.
The Goddess weaves them into reality.
She makes them fit and work in this earth container.
So, blue-sky a fantasy and then try to make it work.