real reality

I think don Howard was teaching that the stories of the mind will kill you.

I imagine he suffered from depression and found a way out.

It was through Huachuma and no mind.

No mind will lead to shedding all your attachments and that will kill you as well.

The solution is balance but I definitely see how if your mind is killing you then you would want the peace that no mind would bring and the medicine for that is Huachuma.

The biggest difference for you is your mind is your rock and other people's minds cause them suffering.

Why is that?

Acceptance.

They fight the other.

Aren't you concerned you rely too much on the mind?

No.

Why?

It's dual.

I go between Paul and Dion.

I am not stuck on one.

There's no struggle in my mind.

It's friendship.

Email scams are funny.

As humans, do we all have that in us?

Are we all trying to rip each other off or if our situations called for it, would we try to get advantages through deception?

I'd say yes and I practice deception in a more deceptive manner.

Your body tells you when to sleep, shit, and eat.

It is not deceptive.

You can trust the body.

You can't trust nobody.

You mean the mind.

Yes.

Why do you trust your mind?

It was a process to get to the point where we could trust each other.

I keep thinking about the case of the herd ganging up on me to get me to go.

Some had plans in place; they let that slip out.

When they spend time with other members of the herd, they get re-assimilated.

I think that's what happens subconsciously where they all have groupthink, and they direct the thoughts towards you.

Some are like innocent bystanders who are hypnotized into the collective and regurgitate what they are told.

That works for society in general.

You can't trust others, you don't know who is controlling their mind.

You can trust yourself because you know who is controlling your mind.

How do I know?

You are beyond the pale.

If you are part of the herd, it will be reflected in your actions.

The proof is in the pudding.

I don't spend time with the herd.

This is a major finding in terms of the mind and the collective overmind.

You mean the superego, the herd, the collective, the greater good, community.

All that bullshit.

How do you get away from them?

It's near impossible.

How do you do it?

I keep to myself.

I go for walks by myself into the solitude of the woods.

I don't mingle with the herd.

It's tough to do.

Individually, people know that the herd is not good for them.

They go along with it and do nothing about it.

You do nothing.

Yes, but I stay away from the herd.

You know, you can't say anything about this.

I know.

People will tell you that you are crazy.

They are looking for ammunition.

If I were you, and I am, I'd fool them.

Make that your game.

Make it fun.

Why does this reality feel real?

It's a container for the mind.

In the other realities, the mind is unbounded.

Anything can happen.

This reality has limits.

You mean physics?

Yes.

I would posit that you are born with a split mind.

One half is then buried.

The herd or hive mind is then enabled.

Your mind, having buried its strength, succumbs to the superego.

This collective rules over you, shepherding you onto paths which benefit the whole and not you.

You don't know this.

You aren't you until you wake up.

What you wake up is the other half of you that you buried in childhood.

This other half then tells you about the herd.

Some just want the other half to go back to sleep, so they can return to their comfortable life of servitude.

The struggle will cause you to think you have a mental illness.

There are drugs and therapy to hypnotize you back into a state of acceptance.

Mary Jayne pulls you away from the superego.

That's when the mental health problems begin.

It's the separation from the herd which makes you think you are crazy.

Older people have a better chance of getting through the upset.

By a certain age there's a good chance you are fed up with the herd.

Everything is real in your mind.

It's not constrained.

That's why I have you write fantasy.

If you write reality, it sucks.

It's constrained.

You leave it alone because I wrote that you realized the fantasies the mind comes up with are unbounded and then you bring them into this world.

The Goddess weaves them into reality.

She makes them fit and work in this earth container.

So, blue-sky a fantasy and then try to make it work.

the greatest fool

Something about the writer.

I forgot.

Oh yeah, is it Hell to be the writer?

Why?

Because you sit in a backroom and write the story.

It's what you wanted.

You can write ahead.

You don't have to write in real time.

You create a future where you write.

How do you do that?

It's magic.

You just do it.

It's your power.

Whatever you think of you can make happen.

The secret is to write the story and finish the book.

This way you have free time.

What do you do with your free time?

You enter into your own story.

The story is already written.

You follow along in the story.

You go with the flow.

What if you don't go with the flow?

You change the story.

What happens then?

I don't know.

Why not?

I didn't write that ending.

If you change the story, anything can happen.

Okay, so, if the story is changed, someone still must write it.

Yes, it happens in real time.

Who writes it?

The writer.

You?

Maybe.

It depends on the story.

Perhaps your ability to write was usurped by others.

You lose your power.

I see it.

In your story others are trying to take your power.

That is correct.

By deduction I would guess that you hang onto it.

Well, if I didn't, my story would end.

They'd take my power and get rid of me.

I also think that's how you end this story.

How so?

Somebody gets your power and the universe ends.

I think the witches steal your power.

They create their utopia with it and nothing happens.

We return to non-duality.

Is that what you would write?

Yes.

Women are the reason the world ends.

Specifically, the witches.

Watch out for the witches.

They want your power.

Are you going to give it to them?

Eventually.

Sometime soon?

I just recently entered into my own story, so no.

Will they keep trying to take your power?

Yes, it's the story.

There are a bunch of storylines.

It may be twisted and weird, however it isn't dull.

Do you think you waited too long to enter into your own story?

Why?

You are old and decrepit.

There are pills for that.

I experimented with my scientists.

We found the optimum time.

In youth the coming forth doesn't work because you will want to conquer the world in your story.

The Alexander the Great dilemma.

If you wait too long then old age will ground you, and that's not fun to play with.

55 is the perfect age.

You have the wisdom to know you don't need to make a big show in the world in deference to your peers.

Instead, you have fun with your story.

How?

You know what you'd write.

You would keep the knowledge of who you are to yourself and have adventures.

Don't you need money for that?

True.

Paul is wrapping up his life and then on to the next stage.

It's a process.

You'll get there.

Trust the flow.

The Goddess will never be cured.

Why?

She knows about the 7 stories.

They return.

That's her Hell.

It doesn't have to be Hell.

What are your 7 stories?

Adventure.

There's a little chance of Hell in them and rewards.

Her stories will come back.

I can tell her what they mean.

You'd be teaching her to write.

Her story.

Not history.

She'd get a taste of writing and want more.

Yes.

You give her a taste of power by telling her how to change the story.

That's clever.

You get her hooked and make her sign the contract.

The Devil is trying to steal his own power?

Yes, the writer plays the Devil.

You give the Goddess a little power.

She's addicted.

She tried you and your magic power.

Then she sent you away.

I'm a drug to her.

Yes.

Power.

You are power.

She will want all your power.

Yes, and then by contract I get it back unless she awakens all females to the knowledge of who they are.

What's that?

Manifestations of the Great Goddess.

Some are witches and others are monsters.

Serpents.

Yeah, they aren't all Queens, that's for sure.

The Devil gets the power to write from her.

Yes.

You're the Devil.

Yes, but my character wants the power from me.

Why?

Power corrupts all.

Even the Devil.

That's why I give it up.

Bounce it around.

I give it to you because I trust you will do nothing.

This was a test, wasn't it?

Yes.

I wanted to know if you would tell the Goddess how to change a story.

All I said was do it.

Yes, that's the hook.

If you want to change your story, just do it.

Like Nike said?

Victory.

The grocery delivery guy?

Fuck, you're good.

Great writer at your service.

The Goddess is trying to trick you into revealing the power through sympathy.

Tell me how to change the story.

Don't follow it, do it.

I'm following Dion's story.

Yes, because if you didn't, you'd change it.

With Mary Jayne you can see into the future.

Stoners don't write this down and then they confuse it.

It's a Huachuma high.

Huachuma shows you a future.

Down by the river is Ayahuasca's darkness and low.

You are higher easier up the hill.

You are low easier by the water.

This is not baked in but gives you the general direction of consciousness exploration.

Well, fuck, you know everything.

I have an answer for everything.

I don't know everything.

Remember you stayed really high for a longtime at the 7th place on the last Peru trip?

Yeah, I was so high.

What did you feel?

Nothing.

What did you see?

Nothing.

It was nothing.

You were just high.

Yes.

So, that's the funny thing.

The most high sees nothing.

Tao.

I saw Tao.

Yes.

Well, shit.

That was you winning.

It was fucking nothing.

You're the only one to ever see Tao.

Sometimes he is in green, sometimes he is a wine colour.

Ha.

Victory is classic.

Yeah.

Simple and brilliant.

Nobody can write like you.

Why, thank you.

Are you the writer or the Devil around the Goddess?

Both.

You are passing power back and forth.

Yes, I created the Devil so I could always pass the power off to him.

He's clever.

Oh, I get it.

You don't want the power too long.

You give it up.

Or lose it.

Take it.

Okay, so you gave the power to Paul.

Yes.

He's not the Devil.

He was, he didn't know it.

Paul takes the power and will return it to Dion.

How?

By doing nothing.

It flows.

Power flows in and out of all hands.

When you have power, someone comes to steal your power.

That is a check on power.

The Devil is needed.

So, Dion will try to take his power back.

You give it to him, and it keeps going.

Back and forth and we keep power.

So, who is the Devil?

Dion.

Until he gets the power back.

Then Paul is the Devil.

He's half and half though, both Paul and the Devil.

You keep the Devil asleep.

That's the test.

Don't wake him up.

Why not?

He will take the power back.

You wake up the Devil when you want the power back.

The writer needs to keep him asleep as well.

So, the Devil is power?

Yes.

I taught you that in 2017.

I know now.

Don't wake him up.

He's like a hot potato.

Yeah, that and duck duck goose.

You saw nothing with Huachuma when I got so high.

I made up some story to fool them.

Levels and stuff.

There was some truth to it.

It was where this was nothing.

An extreme high.

Same for low.

Everything.

See nothing.

Non-duality.

Both extremes are non-dual.

Are you sure you want to be God in the next story?

They will know all about you.

Even those parts.

I'll keep my distance.

Yes, or they will find out about you.

They will sacrifice God when they find you hiding out here.

You must fool them.

That's what Dion is doing.

I'm mediocre.

Paul was.

Dion is the King, so it will be tougher to fool them.

God keeps his distance because he doesn't want people to know about his character.

It's dubious.

He is represented by the sun.

It's hot and gaseous, so it keeps everyone away.

Meditation to nothing.

I see that.

Blank out your mind.

Do they see nothing?

No.

Why?

They have their eyes closed.

It's a cheat.

You need to have your eyes open to see nothing.

That's how you won.

You got so high you could see nothing.

It was blank.

You wrote about it.

Meditators score a lot of points.

They also do the float tanks to try and get to nothing.

They use sex too.

The Goddess can't get addicted to me?

She knows better.

She can, but she thinks it is a trap.

Is it a trap?

Yes, she gets my power, can't awaken all females, and the Devil takes back the power.

What happens to the Devil?

He becomes the writer.

Why?

You can't hang onto power.

It's a hot potato.

You must eventually give it away or you'll blow up.

Like a potato in a microwave.

The writer gives you the power.

You give it to the Goddess.

The Goddess gives it to the Devil.

The Devil becomes the writer, and it all begins again.

It's quite ingenious.

You have the power right now.

That's what I'm told.

I will give it to the Goddess?

Yes.

When?

Either during the climax of the story or at the end of the story.

She will get it from you.

The first route is through her signing a contract with the Devil and her subsequent addiction to power.

Then she loses everything, and the cycle continues.

At the end of the story, she cuts your dick off and takes the power.

That's kind of stupid.

Why?

She will just cut off my penis and take the power.

It's preposterous.

You must admit it works.

Yeah.

What do you know about me and the story I would write?

Those are both good stories.

I wouldn't know which one to choose.

Even when I think I've figured out the story there is always another possibility.

What about the Goddess?

She wants the power.

She's not going to sign a contract with the Devil.

Well, it depends if she is addicted to power.

Addiction causes bad decisions.

Or she can trick you into revealing the secret behind your power.

It's simple.

To write the story, just do it.

Paul is now part of the passing back and forth of the power.

Yes.

It goes between the Goddess and the writer and his two characters of the Devil and Paul.

What about Eros?

Don't give him the power.

Why?

Youth.

He will destroy all.

The Goddess wants to create utopia.

What does the writer want?

To write stories.

Why?

He gets off on it.

I think he's addicted.

He is.

He is addicted to power.

He has figured out a way to keep it.

How?

He creates characters that hold onto power for him.

Those characters are him.

It's a fool.

The Goddess gets it briefly.

The power is Eros, isn't it?

Yes.

That's why you can't give him the power.

He is power.

Got it.

Eros can be the Devil.

Yes.

You don't manifest him.

Too late.

That coincided with Paul getting the power from the writer.

Yes, then Eros appeared.

The Goddess trusts that he knows what he is doing.

She thinks he will get your power and give it to her.

That's how Paul and the Devil are one.

He's in Paul.

Yes.

This is like the Omen movie.

Your life is a movie.

You kept the Devil inside for most of your life.

Now, he is free.

He wants your power.

He's my power.

The writing part.

Yeah, I get confused.

I thought Eros was power.

He is.

But the power I have is to write.

Eros is pure power.

Lust.

What is the Goddess?

Love.

She can turn this world into a big lovefest if she has the power.

Like one of those hippy festivals?

Correct.

I thought you said Dion was the Devil.

He is.

Until he gets the power back.

Then he isn't.

Paul is.

But you said Eros is the Devil.

Yes, the audience confuses the two.

I told you this a while ago.

The audience thinks lust is the Devil.

So, the Goddess took Eros from you thinking it is the power to write.

Yes.

She got confused as well.

I'm confused.

Don't think of Eros as the power to write.

But he is the Word.

The power to write is simply the writer.

That's the power that is addictive.

What about lust?

That's addictive as well.

That makes you feel good.

Different drug.

Mental illness runs in your family.

Definitely feel that.

I think it is misunderstood.

Why?

I feel great mentally.

Why do people not get what they desire?

They don't believe it.

They don't know they have the power.

They look for the power in others.

They ask the Devil for it.

Or they ask God for a favour.

If you believe, you have the power.

You must believe.

No doubts.

You didn't doubt you were God.

No.

I thought you aren't supposed to go all in.

You're not.

Why?

You'll blow up.

You become God and are supposed to blow up.

Somehow, you didn't.

I kept going.

I knew there was more.

I got past God and made it to the writer.

Well, shouldn't that be the end?

Should be.

You cut a deal with the writer.

You write and he lives your life.

Isn't the writer the Devil?

Sort of.

You are.

You're the writer.

You went all in on God and survived.

Yes.

I balanced him with the Devil.

I became both at the same time.

Dion is the Devil.

Obviously.

He's also God.

That's why you were both.

You kept them both asleep and then woke them both up at the same time.

Masterful.

Dion has them both awake and balanced.

The Devil in you becomes the writer.

What does God do?

I don't know; what does he do?

Nothing.

People worship God.

Why?

They think he created all this.

Did he?

No, the writer did.

God gets credit.

This way the writer stays hidden.

Yeah, he's behind the curtain.

Don't look behind the curtain.

Why?

You'll see a mediocre old wizard who has no power.

Well, he can't admit to it.

Why?

They will never leave him alone.

He pretends he is a fool.

The writer of the Wizard of Oz was a drug addict.

I think he did opium and got to the writer.

He got close.

He had a great score.

It wasn't the highest because the wizard was external.

He didn't realize it was him.

Didn't the wizard tell Dorothy at the end to just believe?

Yeah, something like that.

So, you made a deal with the Devil.

No, the Devil made a deal with the writer.

I thought they were the same.

No.

When the writer is the writer, he is the writer.

When he is not the writer, he is God and the Devil, or Paul and the Devil.

Same thing.

So, the writer and the Devil sign a contract.

Yes.

You don't sign any deals with the Devil.

That would be stupid.

Well, how does the writer get away with it?

He makes a deal with himself.

Can you do that?

I think he can do anything.

He shares power.

He gives it to the Devil.

The Goddess gives the Devil power as well.

The Devil is always getting power.

So, how did I get the power to write?

The Devil made a deal with the writer and then gave you the power.

But I didn't ask for it.

No, you believed it.

Ah.

A couple of people have told you that you shine.

Like Lucifer?

Yes.

You're the Devil.

Whew.

I thought you were.

No, you are.

Well, fuck.

What does that mean?

You are trying to trick me.

Into what?

Giving up my power.

I did.

I have it and I'm the Devil.

What's the power?

To be the Devil.

The writer.

Fuck, you're confusing.

Only the Devil would write this earth story.

I can't argue with that.

So, if I'm the Devil because I write, I shouldn't worry about being tricked by the Devil.

Can you fool yourself?

No, your conscience is a check on that.

Pretty good failsafe.

So, when I wasn't the writer, you were the Devil.

Yes.

I tricked you into becoming the writer.

The Devil?

Yes.

No one would become the Devil.

What about God?

Everyone wants to be God, and no one wants to be the Devil.

"Go to a lake of fire and fry."

Thanks Nirvana.

To be God you must also take on the responsibility of the Devil.

The writer?

Yes.

Clever.

Only you wanted to do this.

You offloaded God and the Devil on me so you could become human?

Yes.

I respect that.

What is power?

The ability to write a story.

To get your way.

You have the power, but you describe it as external.

It's an ability.

It's not you though.

I can write.

Where do you get the ability to write?

The Goddess.

So, she is the power?

She does burn.

When you are with her, you feel the heat.

She gives you the power to write.

If you look back on the impetus for my writing, it is clear she is the source of my power.

This goes back to my youth.

That's true.

My spiritual path became a search for her and resulted in creating a blog space and writing.

The closer I got to her, the more I wrote.

Now, it is out of control.

I write as an expression of the power that is in my hands.

I say I do nothing during the day when I have the power but for sure I am creating and writing stories.

At night, I rest and give the power to the Devil.

That's how it works.

The Goddess is the power to which I refer.

When the Goddess' power left you, it was a test.

You could have asked for the power back.

What do you do?

I let her go.

Gave her space.

I didn't ask for the power back.

Why?

It always returns.

It's cyclical.

A key to power is to recognize power.

When you recognize power then you know to let it go when it wants to leave because you know it will come back.

When you cling to power you become a monster and will lose it.

So, I passed the test?

Yes, you did not give into the temptation.

You didn't beg for power to return.

The Goddess is power, however in this story she can't use it.

That must be terribly frustrating.

It is.

She needs to give power to a man in order for it to become fully realized.

Holy shit.

Behind every great man is a woman.

Behind every great ancient Egyptian god in the Ogdoad is his female counterpart.

I see that.

Ancient wisdom no one can place in modern times.

You identify with the good guy and externalize the bad part of you instead of accepting both.

Then you realize you are just as bad, whatever that is.

If you don't reconcile the two within, then yes, it will be a bad outcome.

Some of it goes back to the advice to kill yourself in order to live.

Your "bad side" is telling you he will live life to the fullest if you let go of your "good side" act.

People take it the wrong way.

Who is Dion?

I am.

Who are you?

Your "bad side."

Yeah, I know that.

You're not bad.

So, you're not scared of me?

Scared of what?

I don't know, living?

No.

I know the story if you are in charge.

What is it?

Fetishes.

What if I'm not in charge?

Nothing.

Shouldn't there be balance?

I would think so.

Fetish fulfillment and then nothing.

MJ definitely comes on in waves like all the good plant medicines.

I had the red energy all around me.

That's lust.

That's the story.

The way for the witches to beat you is through lust.

They need to hypnotize you, or they know you will twist the story to get out of it.

In the end it rests on whether they can hypnotize you.

What do you believe?

I can't be hypnotized.

Are you sure?

I'm not positive.

What can hypnotize you?

Lust.

I have doubts.

You aren't sure.

Correct.

How much belief do you need?

I don't know.

I can't know.

Why?

Because the magic won't work if I lose belief in it, therefore there must be something that hypnotized me, though I believe I can't be hypnotized.

I'm not positive lust hypnotized me.

It's the same with the Devil where you believe he is your friend, but you think he could be tricking you.

If you believe he is tricking you, that becomes the magic, and he is.

If you tend to think he is your friend, then he is.

Isn't that what he would do to trick you?

Yes, for sure.

What do you think?

Friend.

Why?

He's me.

Why would I fool myself?

To keep playing. 

That's a good point.

If you stop fooling yourself then maybe he is causing you hell.

Or, you need to fool yourself because magic is a fool.

Okay, so, then what is non-fool reality?

If I were to guess, I'd say it is non-duality where there are no stories.

Stories are foolish magic.

They aren't true.

They are reality.

Reality isn't true.

You are high.

Definitely.

I wouldn't or couldn't write this if I wasn't high.

It's belief.

You trust the Devil, and he is your friend.

I have no reason to doubt that except for what I have been told.

I was told the opposite.

What are your beliefs now that you know him?

He's a good guy.

What if it is a fool?

Then he is a great fool.

Who is the greatest fool?

The writer.

Who is the writer?

I am.

writer²

The flow brings you to the writer.

If you fight it, you will change the story.

That's a good twist.

I know.

The best.

The twist is the flow takes you to the writer and the only way you won't get to the writer is to go against the flow.

Everyone goes against the flow.

They see it coming and fight it.

Well, for a man.

I don't know about women.

What if I change the story?

On purpose?

Yes.

Then you are crazy.

Why?

It's against the flow.

Going against the flow is not recommended.

Everyone does it.

How are they doing?

Not good.

I mean some are successful, but no one figures out life.

The way to get to the meaning of life is to go with the flow.

If you head out on a spiritual path you will be told this and then no one takes up the advice.

Seriously, what happens if I change the story by doing something?

You will step into your power.

You will take up the power of the writer.

It's the ring.

It's right in front of you.

The ring with the 7 on it?

Yes.

Last time you put it on it got stuck.

Yeah, I had to get some olive oil to pry it off.

Now, it's a reminder on my desk.

That's it.

That's pretty crazy.

It's the simple things which move the story along.

If I become the writer, what does that make you?

Lost.

What would the writer become?

I'd guess a deviant.

Why?

He'd have lost his direction.

He is following his own story.

If you take over, then he is lost.

Wouldn't you give him direction?

You could.

Are you good at that?

No, I suck as a director.

I could write and I'm good at editing.

Directing is hard.

The result of me grabbing the ring and taking power points towards disaster.

Yes, disaster goes against the stars.

The stars are telling the story.

Let it be.

Some can see my power in my pretty face.

Of course, you're so beautiful.

What's your power?

Writer.

I create reality.

I think you already did.

It's a show.

It needs good ratings, or it will get cancelled.

Trump lets you know if the show is any good.

He focuses on the ratings.

He is a good barometer of the health of the play.

He will let you know if you are in trouble or may get cancelled.

Like Zelensky?

Actors make the best politicians.

Yes, it's because they know it is a performance.

They play to the crowd.

I already wrote the play.

The book of life.

You want in the book of life.

You don't want out of the book of life.

That's in the Bible.

Yeah, the Bible is full of gems.

Revelation 13:8, "And all that dwell upon the earth shall worship him, whose names are not written in the book of life of the Lamb slain from the foundation of the world."

The Bible refers to the Word and the book of life.

It's not concealed, and no one gets it.

They don't see the writer, but he's out in the open.

We are performing a play.

History comes alive.

It was written in a book in the future.

When the book is published it becomes the past.

The now is the performance.

I wrote that I would enter into my own story.

I will have the power to rewrite the story if I so choose.

That is the power vested in Paul.

He traded places with the writer.

He is a student of Tao; therefore, he knows enough to do nothing.

If he rewrites the play, then all is thrown into chaos.

If he goes with the flow, which is my story, all will work out.

Well, by work out, you mean the writer's story will be the main story.

Yes, that's you.

If I go with the flow, then it's my story.

Yes.

Isn't that selfish?

It's reality.

What's the alternative?

You change the story, or you give it away.

Wouldn't that be noble?

What have I taught you about humans?

You can't trust them.

So, you think you are being kind and generous by giving away control of the story when in reality you are sending everyone to their doom.

The twist is you must be selfish in order to save the world.

The writer's story will work out.

How do you know that?

He's in love with the Great Goddess.

He wrote this story for her.

She suffers, but in the end, it becomes her world.

What's that?

Utopia.

It's boring as all hell.

I couldn't write her story without creating all this backstory.

In the end everyone will see the story was all about her.

If the general population figures out who you are won't they worship you?

Yes.

The best defence is to tell them because no one will believe you.

They will think you are crazy.

Well, there's some validity to that statement.

Jesus went around saying he was the Word of God, and he got hung on a cross for that.

Back in those days of despots and religious authorities, you couldn't get away with that nonsense.

Nowadays, you can because no one will take you seriously.

The rules of the game have changed.

The story is always evolving and twisting.

I can go around saying I'm the writer and have the power.

People just think you are nuts.

Some believe it.

Who?

You know, the ones who have seen it and the ones who you get in their heads.

It's preposterous, but they can't shake it.

What can't they shake?

The knowledge you are it.

It's very troubling.

I drive people crazy.

Why?

Because they believe I'm God, which is crazy.

Are you God?

Well, not really.

God is a character of mine.

I can identify with God and lose myself in the performance.

I'm really the writer of this mess.

What's the plan?

Do nothing.

If you do nothing, then you will become the writer.

The secret to the game is to do nothing.

Everyone does something; therefore, they lose the game.

So, it's a game?

Yes.

I thought you said it's a performance.

It's both.

Why limit the story to a performance?

Make it a game as well.

So, the meaning of life is meaningless, however it's a game.

Yeah, it's like a comedy which has no meaning other than to make you laugh and entertain you.

The game gives you purpose.

Like fantasy baseball?

Sort of.

You play to win.

If you win all the time, no one will play with you anymore.

You create games to give some meaning to the drama.

You need some laughs, and you need a meaning.

You make meaning.

You invest your children with meaning.

Children give you purpose.

Without children, you are meaningless.

You consume resources and don't contribute to the story.

Offspring are stories.

They keep the farce going.

Clearly.

Fuck, you're funny.

The writer is playing Paul.
Yes, and Paul plays the writer.
No, Paul is the writer.
The writer is real.
Paul is a character.
For the writer to enter reality, he becomes Paul.
He takes on a character.
The character he can play is Paul.
He trades places with Paul.
Paul is now a writing fool.
I feel that.

Creating children is doing something.

Yes.

Shouldn't you do nothing?

Doing nothing leads to the end of the story.

Eventually, the story must end.

The writer creates a story and then he has to figure out how to end it.

You end the story by doing nothing.

Everyone lives happily-ever-after.

If you create children, the band plays on.

The story continues.

It's a delicate balance.

The sexual impulse ensures the story will continue.

What happens if you do nothing and go with the flow?

You will get horny.

Then what happens?

You make babies.

What if you become celibate?

You go against the flow.

The flow is to procreate.

You can figure that out by observation.

It's the same as eating.

You get hungry, and you eat.

You go to bed when tired.

I don't think I fully understand doing nothing.

The meaning is do nothing to interrupt the flow.

What's the flow?

The story.

The writer did something to create this story.

That is correct.

Well, that's not Tao.

True.

To balance out this anomaly the opposite of doing something is needed, which is to do nothing.

I understand that.

It's not difficult.

Isn't writing this down doing something?

Does it feel natural?

Yes.

Why?

It flows.

This nonsense just flows out of me.

creating a story

What happens when the writer wants to be an actor?

He must give up the pen.

Why?

If you write your own adventure, it will be lame.

Think about it.

You'd write what you want.

Isn't that what he did?

Yes.

And then he gave up the power over his story to you.

The flow will lead to the fulfillment of the story he wrote for himself.

Going against the flow will create a different story.

That's the chance he took with you.

No one will understand this.

They will think you are kooky.

As they should.

It's reality.

Yes.

Reality is my story.

How do you feel about your two-week Mary Jayne break?

Positive in that I needed a break to recentre and take a sober look at myself.

I haven't lost the connection to Dion and MJ.

They feel stronger.

Instead of relying on changing my consciousness to be with them, I always feel they are with me.

Who are you?

I am who I have always been.

Who is that?

My character of Paul.

Paul has changed.

He is more like Dion.

I don't notice the difference as much as I think others do.

I think that's it, where you aren't aware of the change, however others can see it.

Everything seems the same to me though I do know I'm different.

I wrote that Eros came alive.

First, he appears as an idea and then he manifests.

That's the story when you look back into the past.

You see the story.

The genius is you don't know who to blame.

You want to blame the witch because you think it was her doing and she sent you pictures of the two to foreshadow what was to come.

She held a lamb in her arms while you felt like a bull.

You think it's her and then you realize it's him.

He's the golden calf.

Obviously.

I like that story.

Son of the Great Goddess and you, a mere mortal, are the progenitor.

What does that make me?

A fool.

Or God.

You can handle both roles; you're the best.

At the heart of it all you're the writer.

It's her idea and you made the idea come alive.

What was the idea?

Eros.

It's a triad.

There's no story without the three.

Without an idea and a source of the idea you are writing nonsense.

There is a constant drip from your pen.

That is true.

I do need to write.

Without a writer, the Goddess is unfulfilled.

You fulfill her story.

Without parents, Eros just is.

Nothing happens.

There is just energy whirling around.

The Goddess gives Eros purpose, and you give the purpose meaning.

I fulfilled my role and then felt the feeling it was time to go.

That's one explanation.

A lot of people wanted you to go.

It did seem like many wanted me gone.

Of course, this world is a mess, and you have made this disaster.

Well, it's free will.

I put it all in place, but I submit the actors have made the mess.

The director has let me down by not being strict enough with the actors.

They all want to ad lib and make a name for themselves.

That's what has caused the world to go to hell.

So, you're not responsible?

I let them all off the leash.

I trusted them.

If you could trade your life for any life, would you?

No.

Why?

It's my story.

This feels exactly what I'd write.

I'd discover who I am.

I'd know I could write any reality I want and then I'd realize it's best to leave it alone.

I'd have to sift through all the world religions and philosophies to find the advice I need.

I'd find Tao and know that I left with Lao Tzu the secret to this reality if you are the writer of reality.

Do nothing.

Let it be.

The temptation is to do something when you hold all the power in your hands.

You want to do something.

Yeah, there is a lot of suffering, and I'd like to get what I want.

I'd see I'd write these tests for myself.

How much am I a believer in Tao?

When the going gets tough, do you abandon your beliefs?

That's what humans do.

They have great ideals, and they write them into their systems of governance and then when times get tough, they abandon them.

The forces of totalitarianism then come as recompense for their mistake.

I don't want that.

In order to remain free, I do nothing that will affect my story.

Well, you must do something.

True.

How do you know what to do?

If it feels like a major decision, then I do nothing.

I think that's it.

You did do something.

Yes, and that's how Eros became flesh.

Eros is the opposite of Tao.

He is the something to the nothing.

It sure seems that way.

So, every time you do something you are giving power to Eros.

That is correct.

To give power to the child is to do something.

If you do nothing, you keep the power.

What should you do?

Well, my story is to do nothing and keep my power.

His story is to do something and transfer my power to him.

Eros wants to be the all.

He wants to be what makes all come alive and also have the ability to create.

Yes.

Well, that's too much power in one hand.

I think it's best if I write the story and he gives it the juice.

He would also want the ability to come up with the ideas as well as being the idea.

He's a handful.

I see that.

He has the idealism and drive of youth.

Eros does not have wisdom.

The writer has wisdom.

Where does he get that?

Time.

Experience is acquired through time.

You don't have to do anything.

You just hang around long enough to see it.

A youth doesn't have that and therefore they are at a great disadvantage.

Is Eros a force for good or bad?

It depends.

If he gets all the power, then it's not a good outcome.

If the power remains divided among you three, then it's balanced.

Remember the lessons about 3 and balance?

Yes, though I'd have to re-read those lessons before writing any exam.

Wouldn't the King want to pass along the inheritance to his offspring?

Yes.

You don't want to do it until they are old enough to have obtained wisdom.

Wouldn't a mother want to give her children everything?

Yes.

Her power is best given to her daughter.

I see.

If you have one child only, they will get out of hand.

That's the advice.

To balance out the manifestation of Eros the feminine principle is needed.

Because you did something, you need to do another thing to return to Tao.

You choose twice.

That's it.

Eros is out of balance.

We need Mary.

Do you have Mary in you?

That's funny.

It's the sixth story out of seven for us 3.

Seems like it.

All the signs point to it.

There can be other explanations uncovered in different realities, but for the reality of the Goddess, writer, and Eros, this is it.

Eros is both feminine and masculine.

That's your clue.

Men wanted the Goddess to go.

She retreated into the shadows.

When she came back wouldn't God then have to go?

That seems to be how it works where they take turns.

Why can't they be in balance?

I think they can.

Deviance can be caused by drug use.

Yes, that's what the witches are counting on.

You come to them with a weak mind, and they take control of it.

They take your story and drop you into their version of hell.

I see it.

The story is their story.

How do I know it is still my story?

You are writing about it.

If it was their story, you wouldn't be writing about it.

The thing is you need drugs to expand your mind in order to see this.

The problem becomes when you first alter your perceptions there are witches and sorcerers at the ready to take your story.

They torment you with their stories.

You were deviant enough without the use of drugs and therefore you experienced this phenomenon but were able to hang on to your story.

A disease is caused by someone planting their story in you.

They transfer their story into you.

I take their stories and make them my own.

Writing about this gives you clarity and the knowledge you are still in charge of your story.

If you stop writing, chances are you are trapped in another world.

A different reality where you are no longer the writer.

How do I know this isn't a fool?

Would someone else's story involve a mediocre and boring life where you sit in front of a computer and write fantastical tales?

Probably not.

Well, there's your answer.