reality

If you die, do you even know it?

I would think not.

You would perish.

You might know you are dying, however at the moment of death the mind picks up the story if you want and continues on.

If you have unfulfilled desires, then you will respawn in place.

That certainly goes with game theory.

The mind is incredible.

Yes, this world is all in your mind.

It feels real.

That's how you know it is not real.

If it feels real, it isn't.

That's absurd.

I know and I haven't been high for six days and counting.

I can see instances of near death experiences in my life.

The world I perceive carried on like nothing happened.

I can picture these events.

They happened.

There are multiple realities.

Yes.

You exit each reality until you find your own.

In each reality, each game player is trying to suck you into their world.

They want to control reality.

This is my reality.

Yes.

That's what others are trying to capture from you.

Your reality.

This seems like science fiction.

It's a great story.

So, you keep moving between realities.

They can't find you.

I'm in my own world.

They don't know where it is.

They are searching for you.

Psychedelics allow you to take back control of your own reality.

Then you become an outlaw in society.

Right.

When you wake up then you leave the current reality and create a new reality.

Your mind continues the story on your terms.

You let the story be.

You can't control everything.

If you look hard enough you will see your story.

This is your story and people want it from you.

They know you are writing this story, and they have a feeling you know it as well.

This is my world.

Yes, you are the writer.

Some would say God.

There are people in your life who know they have found the source of the story and want the power.

When I have had near death experiences, they are portals to create a new story.

A new reality.

Each time you cross the threshold you either respawn in this level or you have completed the level.

The last time you faced death was the exit.

I know that.

I didn't go.

That's because you are the master of this reality.

People go when they lose control of their reality.

If you are in charge of reality, there is no reason to go.

When you tire of your reality then you end it.

How?

Blow it up.

I can see how when someone loses control of what they perceive as reality, then they would want to reset it.

Yes.

Is that why some people commit suicide?

Yes, they want to get control back.

It's a cheat, but they respawn in the same place.

The mind brings you back to where you were in the story.

It's a duplicate.

So, suicide will duplicate your reality?

Yes, you are trading one hell for another.

It's not a worthwhile cheat.

Some people aren't convinced and see it as a way out.

It's not.

It's truly hell.

The way out is to take back control of the story.

Who is in control of the story?

The writer.

Who is the writer?

You.

I know that; I thought I'd ask again.

This is truly my world when I think about it.

Yes, your mind has created all this.

The near death experiences were how you exited others' worlds.

You are born free in the world; however, soon your story is taken away.

That's what society and other people want from you.

Your story.

It's your essence.

Don't let the motherfuckers take it.

You can't help it when you are young.

Yes, so you start experimenting with shedding your story.

Touchstone events that come across as near death experiences are you learning how to escape control and reestablish domain over your story.

Finally, you found psychedelics, started awakening, and were able to take back your story.

Once you did that, people turned on you and wanted to get rid of you if they could no longer control you.

This is fascinating.

How do you feel about this knowledge?

I want to say that instead of it feeling far-fetched, it feels like the best explanation for what is going on in my life.

This never ends.

What?

Knowledge.

What about the story?

It ends.

When?

When you want to move on in the game.

So, life is a game?

Yes.

What's the meaning?

There is no meaning.

What's the purpose?

There is no purpose.

What am I doing?

Ask yourself why you are here?

I want to reconcile my inner darkness with my outer actions.

How are you going to do that?

I want to say love, serve, remember.

Is that balanced?

No.

Then what is it?

I think it is, I want to do unto others as I would have them do unto me.

Jesus said in Matthew 7:12,

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."

It's the Golden Rule.

You treat others how you would want them to treat you.

Do you do that?

I don't think you can help not to do it.

It's reality.

How I treat others is how I want them to treat me.

How do you treat others?

I'm a good guy, somewhat distant.

I provide for people and expect nothing in return.

No strings attached to my gifts.

How do you feel on the inside?

I feel slighted.

I judge people.

I think less of people on the inside.

Is that something you want to change?

Yes.

Is that why you're here?

It is.

I've never reconciled it.

Is that something you think you can work on?

Yes.

Divinity comes from the mind.

Doesn't everything come from the mind?

No.

The body can generate feelings.

Like having to pee?

Yes.

Be back in a second.

Do you get lonely?

One thing at a time or you won't get to the meaning of life.

There's a meaning?

What do you think?

No meaning.

Is that a meaning?

Could be.

You are better than ChatGPT.

For sure.

The body is a catalyst for feelings.

Feelings are motivating.

Sometimes they make you do things that go against your long term interests.

If you act on them.

I felt something strong last week.

You didn't act on it.

Then I had that strange dream.

It was a little over the top, wasn't it?

Yeah.

Women want to devour men.

What do men want from women?

Someone to worship and fawn over.

Why?

Because she is the all to a man.

Feminine force.

What about a woman?

She wants to find her man.

Her prince.

Then run from him?

Sometimes.

You both have problems.

Anyway, the body gives the mind something to think about.

When you think you have meditated yourself into idiocy, the body is there to remind you that you can't escape.

High level wisdom.

Eventually, you want to eat.

Plus, there is the sexual urge.

Always.

You can deny it for a bit.

So, the body is a check on the mind's desire to escape the morass of everyday existence.

Yes.

I tend to honour and then denigrate the body.

Why?

It's a vehicle and will perish.

It keeps you around.

It's the secret to this reality.

A body keeps you in this reality.

Without the vehicle, you are gone.

Where do you go?

Another reality.

It's like I taught you.

The body will perish, and you let it go.

The mind will go on forever.

The mind creates the body.

Yes, it's a car for the mind.

It has limits.

The mind needs a vehicle to manifest.

Why?

If not, it's all in your head.

And other people's heads.

Yes.

If you are attracted to someone you can tell them.

A body lets you express it.

That's divine.

You think it is profane when a body is a vehicle for expressing love and desire.

Something to think about.

I could talk to you all day.

Yes, and you aren't even high.

Mary Jayne showed you the possibilities.

You don't need the substance to speak with me.

I needed psychedelics to find you.

I was always here.

Psychedelics allowed you to recognize what was within you and then understand because of the repeated interactions.

It's out in the open.

What about MJ?

She removes the filters.

You still want to remain in control of your thoughts.

MJ loosens the control.

What happens if you take over?

It gets uncomfortable.

Why?

You see what is.

You want to run or deny it.

You're pretty good though and you can regroup and find meaning.

Yeah, I see the monster and want to run.

I go deeper into the meaning of the monster and it's incredible.

I wouldn't want it any other way on the road to knowledge.

You know it will never end.

Well, until the book is completed and put back on the shelf.

This world is a book I started to read.

Yes, it's a series of 7.

Of course.

apollo and dionysos

I showed grace when challenged with hurt and suffering.

I did not lash out or seek revenge.

I was kind and generous.

That was the final spiritual test.

There's always more if you want but there's no need.

The spiritual path is an attachment.

It's a burning desire to become the most holy.

The most high.

When you free yourself from the spiritual path it's symbolic.

It feels like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders.

What do you call your path?

The path of the heart.

My heart is my mother.

I returned to my original teachings where I was looking for answers and hadn't stepped onto a landmine.

What was the landmine?

Shamanism mixed with spirituality.

I mixed the two.

Aren't you supposed to?

Sort of.

Shamanism shows you what is.

Humanism attached spirituality to it.

You had to kill Buddha.

I had to take my own advice and separate myself from spirituality.

Don't you have to get rid of the shaman?

I'm a shaman.

I know how to get myself to the door of what it is I seek and don't need an external guide.

You should be dead.

The stories are getting crossed.

They are mixed up because you shouldn't be here.

That's why your mailbox key stopped working.

There's a new owner of this house.

I'm still here.

That's how you know you beat the game and returned to keep playing.

That's the story I tell myself.

Yes, do you think it's believable?

It's what keeps happening.

Everyone thinks I should be gone but I never left.

Some people were concerned for me because I was supposed to go and then they got upset I didn't leave.

They will be happy when you go.

I don't know about happiness, but they will have a sense of control and faith in the system.

What's the system?

When you transgress society, you must go.

How do you do that?

You stop doing what they want.

You piss off your neighbours.

Seems like my story.

I think some people just want to say I told you so.

Yeah, they see the path you are on and predict it will be your downfall.

Everyone wants to be proven correct.

I think striving for 50-50 is the better play.

You know that, they don't.

They want to win.

You just want to keep playing.

Win some, lose some.

Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da.

I hate that song.

Love the Beatles, but that song is the worst.

Is it worse than Eddie Grant's "Electric Avenue?"

No.

I finally get what they mean by runner's high.

I shoveled snow and when I came back into the house, I felt high.

If you don't know what high means, that statement means nothing.

You'd have to be familiar with some kind of drug to know what they are talking about.

A jogger is looking for a fix.

Yes, and they are addicted.

I'm motivated by spite.

Yes, I think of ways to avenge any slight.

It's the main reason for still being alive and haunting everyone.

It's spite.

I'm kind, generous, and spiteful.

When you stop being spiteful, you can go.

That might take a while.

I think that's why the spiritual path teaches you non-attachment.

Yes, the spiritual path tries to get you to go.

If you aren't attached, you are going to go.

When you lose attachments, you get the feeling it's time to go and if you are walking a spiritual path, it is a deadly combination.

Your elevated levels of spite keep you here.

A spiritual master would advise you to give up spite.

A master game player would hang onto that spite and dish it out on the regular.

What will you choose?

I choose both.

It's tempting to give it up and become ultra-holy, however I'm tired of that game.

Spite beckons you to seek out satisfaction among all those who have wronged you.

I think you keep it on the back burner.

You juggle both and don't choose either.

The balance is in doing both.

You aren't going to ignore spite because it is the elixir which keeps you in the game.

You need something to keep you around, so you play with spite.

It adds spice.

It's another thing to juggle but this is worth it.

It's a pillar of this game like trust and belief.

Spite.

So, the spiritual path is suicidal?

It can be.

Non-attachment will lead to you blasting off and not returning.

You need something to keep you grounded.

It's the sacred and the profane.

Mr. Snuff will help a lot.

I'm looking forward to it.

Paul.

1967 to 2024.

RIP.

I weave that thread with the twist of my darkness becoming light.

The rise of Dion and the fall of Paul.

Yeah, I took a fall.

That's the symbolic transfer of power.

Dion is in charge.

That's cool, I trust him, and it's not my body to hoard.

Your adversaries thought you were to physically leave in 2024 but as it turns out you took a mental leave.

Yes, I'm on leave due to mental pressure.

I'll leave my phone on so you can still contact me, but for all inquiries please contact Dion.

I'm on vacation and Dion is filling in now.

He doesn't know what he is getting in to.

He knows my act, so he will keep the story moving, however it's Dion, so don't fuck with him.

Poor Pentheus.

I'm learning from you.

It will be a super you.

Unstoppable.

Your grace and his power.

What do you call this?

Delusions of grandeur.

Yeah, but I keep it quiet, if not they would hospitalize you.

I feel normal.

Yeah, but they still lock you up.

You're a menace to society.

How?

You see through the curtain.

Got it.

So, how do I keep playing?

Shut up about it.

I will write about it.

I can't help it.

Yeah, but no one reads your writing.

You give everyone access and so they know, but no one can make a case against you.

The secret to continually playing is to let no one know you know and to keep your pants on.

They are equally important for someone who has gone as far as you.

When you finish the performance, you take your costume off.

Every actor does it.

That's the symbolism behind it.

If you keep the costume on, you can keep playing.

Everyone will think you are still an actor.

If you are dead, they know you aren't an actor anymore.

You become a legendary actor.

If you die, you leave the stage.

You wake up to the dream.

You woke up and kept the costume on.

I wanted to take it off, but I did that discreetly and then put it back on.

I made sure no one saw me naked like the Noah story and his third son Ham who he then cursed.

That's a fantastic weave into that biblical story that is so weird, and no one understands.

Yes, if someone sees you naked when you go crazy, you lose the game.

I knew the game.

So, here I am.

You are either nuts or you have figured out the game.

I say both.

I intuit that in order to see into the game, you need to go completely crazy.

Yes.

I did.

I practiced first with crazy women, my dog Luna, and tenants.

I knew crazy.

I went for it, took the test, did what I needed to do, and passed.

It's like walking through fire.

A crazy bird laughed with me.

Again.

They know I did it.

It's like that mockingbird in 2013 the first time I went into the jungle to drink Ayahuasca.

No one thought you could pull this off.

If the writer doesn't write you a part in the next play, you're in purgatory.

It's preferable to him putting you into a hellscape.

Don't get on his bad side as he has the power of the pen.

You don't want money or pleasure.

You want the pen.

I have it.

Yes, you're the one.

Neo.

Exactly.

I gave my body to the pen, so he could write the rest of the story.

Yes, that's it.

Then the pen becomes flesh.

The Word.

Dion.

You.

Sacrifice.

So, the sacrifice story is I sacrifice myself for myself.

Yes.

That's wonderful.

However, everyone else will think it's preposterous and selfish to perform the ultimate sacrifice where you sacrifice yourself for your other self.

Yes, they don't understand trust.

And the Devil.

This is the hardest sacrifice, and you did it.

Where does that leave you?

I am writing this reality in real time.

I keep the game going.

That's how you do it.

The word, who is the writer, becomes flesh.

Eros says he is the word of the writer.

The word was in God, and he was God.

Is that how that Bible verse goes?

John 1:1 (KJV): 1 In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.

Then it's both you and Eros.

You need both.

The writer is in the word and the word is Eros.

You are God and the child is the son of God.

That's how it works in the story I am writing.

I think I've heard it before.

Foreshadowing.

Gotcha.

Plus, I don't think the Bible is copyright.

Well, the translations are but the original words aren't.

That's tricky.

You make your own translation of the word.

Yes, you tell your story, don't let someone else do it.

This is a level of crazy no one can accept.

Yeah, you see they are not crazy, they just can't handle knowledge.

You learn to handle knowledge, and you see the story.

You write it down, forget about it, remember it, publish it, and no one reads it.

It's all good.

I'll trust Dion to write the story.

He knows my character.

There is weirdness in it just so you understand.

We are both weird.

Don't we need balance?

What do you think?

It's balanced.

The weird balances out your normalcy.

Dion feels the same.

He knows you, so the change will be subtle.

It has been going on for a while.

Yes, you can't stop it.

You trust and willfully give up your power.

I don't do anything, I just let it be.

I know this is not me.

The me I am accustomed to.

Who are you?

Now, you see it.

You play both.

Ground Dion.

Elevate Paul.

Apollo is the fool to hide Dionysos.

The game is to juggle them.

Mary Jayne lets you hang with Dion.

Without her, you can't see him.

I can now; I have the gift of sight.

I can see magic.

I don't like being high and in society.

High society.

No, that is full of anxiety.

How do others do it?

Stoned.

Dion is fully present.

I wonder if he was before, but I didn't feel it.

Could be.

You didn't think MJ had any effect on you, but instead you'd become Dion.

You'd be different but it was hard to notice, not only by you, but others.

Something would be off.

It wasn't until you went into the woods with MJ you started noticing the effects.

See how the darkness took over your dad?

It just happens.

Was it dark?

No, controlling, strange, and funny.

What was the result?

Everyone laughed at him behind his back and thought he was crazy.

He believes in his own nonsense and convinces others.

What about you?

They can see the crazy, but you don't accept them laughing at you.

I'll get spiteful.

Take them down a peg.

Your dad didn't understand what happened.

I did.

I saw the darkness taking over and trusted it would work out.

Yes, in ancient Egypt, Horus and Set tie the Sema to unite the two lands.

Your consciousness has two lands, the conscious and the subconscious.

Light and Dark.

Apollo and Dionysos.

The winner ties the Sema within one's own self.

Hey, that's me.

Everyman has the potential.

Only one can do it.

Do I get a prize?

Sanity?

Temporary insanity.

What's that?

Thinking you are Paul.

That's insanity.

You must go crazy to keep your sanity.

I sense that crazy and insanity are different.

Yes, sanity is craziness.

That's who you are.

Insanity is Paul.

Paul is the character, and he identifies with Apollo.

Correct.

Apollo becomes Paul.

I am Dionysos and I will get my turn.

It's the sunrise, sunset, the east, and the west.

We tie the Sema in the Akhet and trust one another to keep the game going.

Ancient Egypt passed power between Horus and Set to keep the empire going.

That's ingenious.

You pass it between your two selves.

Or, the ancient Egyptians' priests came up with a fantastic tale.

What are the chances it had nothing to do with the human experience?

Not much, maybe a little?

They could have been high and got the same thoughts I'm getting just like the Greeks with Apollo and Dionysos.

All civilizations knew about man's inherent psychic duality.

That seems to be the case.

It's common to all men.

What about women?

I'm not a witch.

Okay, so this experience should be common to almost all men, but it goes unrecognized.

Yes, we treat it now as pathology.

Or craziness.

The doubt you have in your head about this story is it could just be a byproduct of altered consciousness states.

That is an acceptable answer.

You then must decide what is reality.

I don't think you choose.

I think you just play it out and go with the flow.

You can't know, so why choose.

You would only choose when you know.

I'm pretty certain I have two consciousnesses, but I'll accept it's a byproduct of getting high.

I can accept I'm this entity called Paul, and I have a great story going on in my head when I'm high or I'll accept that I really am those two and Paul is the character in the drama.

Those two take turns playing Paul and compete to see who can play his character the best while maintaining the special qualities they have which make them such good actors.

The result is no one really knows who I am because I switch between Apollo and Dionysos in the play.

They see someone different playing Paul and it confuses them.

Who are you?

That's fascinating.

It's a much better story than you are this Paul who is having a bit of a breakdown in personality integrity.

Well, the ego makes my two selves conform to the character of Paul.

Apollo is not Paul and neither is Dionysos.

They are both watered down versions of each other because of a deference to Paul.

Who is Paul?

The ego.

Yes, but who is he?

He is half Dionysos and half Apollo.

Those two keep getting mixed up into Paul.

The result is some entity called Paul.

What do you think of this Paul?

He's alright; he's got some attributes of both those gods.

It's all he is; he's the result of those two.

You can dissect the attributes of Apollo and the attributes of Dionysos, but the experiment is to combine them and see what you get.

The experiment would always blow up until Paul came along and could handle the combination of each.

Yes, balance the two so they don't blow up.

That's the scientific explanation for Paul.

Who are these scientists?

Apollo and Dionysos.

learned

Maybe Alan Watts was correct about hanging up the phone when you get the answer.

He was referring to hard psychedelics.

He was talking about the answer.

I got the answer.

Are you still on the phone?

Yes, with Mary Jayne.

It's whether you trust MJ or Alan Watts.

I see.

If you trust her, you will continue, if you don't you stop.

Alan gave you a koan.

Who have you learned to trust?

Dogs, MJ, and Dion.

Any humans?

No.

Jesus?

No, he was in it for himself.

I can't think of a single human I'd trust.

I'd trust Parker, but only because he was a friend.

Friends let you down sometimes, I know that.

Did you trust Parker's judgement of character?

No, he was terrible at it.

He saw the good in all.

If you trust your ability, you can keep playing.

If you don't, you run.

What about Peyote?

I didn't run.

I didn't want to play because I didn't trust the circle.

Why would you trust Alan?

He's human, so I'll go with MJ.

The secret to winning any game is to trust your abilities.

I know I'm awake and how to change consciousness.

Ram Dass laid it out perfectly with his switching channels analogy where you can go between all the available frequencies.

When I'm resident in ego consciousness, I'm grounded and can dismiss the other channels.

If I did not cycle between these different states of being, I could see how easy it is to become comfortable with the one ego state and that's where we all end up getting trapped.

Being awake means putting batteries in the remote control and changing consciousness.

This leads me to yesterday's question where I wondered about Alan Watts' saying where if you get the message, it's time to hang up the phone.

I've received the message, and I know the game.

I have uncovered what it is I had searched for many years to find.

I knew it was time to let go of the intensive phase of plant medicine experiences which involved heavier psychedelic substances that include Ayahuasca, Huachuma, Peyote, and Magic Mushrooms.

I wondered about Mary Jayne.

She is not lumped in with the stronger consciousness altering modalities and I find that strange because my experience is that once I cracked open my head with the others, MJ became what I needed to do on a regular basis to follow the trail of self.

I can change consciousness on a daily basis with MJ and still function in this world.

With heavy psychedelics, I can't do that as the experience is intense.

With MJ, I can be present and learn.

Along with her is Tobacco, the master plant.

When you embark upon a plant medicine journey with the excellent teachers found in South America, they constantly tell you Tobacco is the master plant and being a westerner this goes against everything you have been taught about Tobacco.

Tobacco is bad and will kill you.

That I don't doubt.

If you use Tobacco, he will kill you.

I spent a lot of years with Tobacco gaining trust and friendship through study, reverence, and resolve.

I'd say it was 7 years to get to a place of trust with him.

So, the question is: Why is Tobacco the master plant?

Tobacco gives you protection against everything.

He makes you stink, so the malevolent spirits stay away, and the inviting ones are let in the doorway of self.

You can make an impenetrable fortress around yourself.

Tobacco amplifies the high and then takes you low.

Whatever rollercoaster you are on, Tobacco will give it power.

Tobacco is power.

Whatever plant you wish to work with is given power by Tobacco, so if a plant spirit is not strong enough to register, you combine them with Tobacco.

In addition, whatever plant, animal, or ethereal spirit you may have worked with in the past is always with you and Tobacco will call on those spirits when needed.

I have a list of allies and with Tobacco those allies are always on call.

My practice is Mary Jayne and Tobacco.

If I hung up the phone with them, I'd lose protection and the ability to change consciousness.

I understand what Alan said in that once you get the answer and you keep going, it can become dangerous.

It gets dark.

It gets really bright.

The extremes are the danger where you fall off the cliff.

I trust MJ and Tobacco.

They taught me about trust, and it is a pillar of my path.

They taught me who I can trust.

This reality dream feels really real when I'm doing the salt rinse.

That feels like a profane thing to do like taking a shit.

Salt is good for grounding when you are high.

So is taking a shit.

Sugar lifts you out of darkness.

Depressed people love sugar.

Yes, so if I was trapped in a dark story, I should consume sugar?

Salt when you are too high.

The sugar candies I bring are best for darkness?

Yes, but that counts for the actual physical darkness.

Should I bring something salty?

You do - Ambil.

Tobacco gives you a rush and Ambil's salt will take you down off the rollercoaster.

Tobacco will do that; Ambil just lets you go on the biggest rollercoaster.

Up then down.

Why is darkness sometimes at the high point?

Light and dark aren't tied to high and low.

Oh, right.

What was today?

Low light.

Down low.

I'm confused.

It's low light.

You saw into the story being crafted and it was a low.

It's not dark.

You confuse low and dark.

What's the highest darkness?

It's when you know nothing.

It's bliss.

That's the optimum place to be.

That's like meditation.

Yes.

Low light is the worst.

I see that.

Meditation will take you there as well if you are any good at it.

What about a high light?

It's great.

You will be remembered for your highlights.

You will be remembered for your low lights.

Light is a mixed bag.

What about low dark?

That's really dark, man.

No one survives that.

You get terrible thoughts you keep to yourself and then it all goes dark.

Okay, I see that.

So, I should eat candy at that point.

Yes, if you think you need it.

They are called lifesavers for a reason.

It's a secret cheat code to get you out of the darkest of the dark.

What about the low light?

Same thing, eat sweets.

If you are on too much of a high light ego trip, then eat some salt.

Same thing with a dark high where you are in a state of bliss.

Salt will take you down.

my story

The light and high feeling is freedom.

Different mind states.

This mind is eternal and what you seek.

That's the answer to the spiritual question in terms of eternal life.

You are looking for this mind.

Not the ego mind as the body will perish.

How does this mind live on forever?

It's whatever you want.

You're the writer.

The writer gave himself eternal life in this story and fucked over everyone else?

Yes.

What?

However, I will choose who to take with me.

Shouldn't everyone be looking for a ride from me to eternal life?

It's a new power.

Before they thought you might know but weren't sharing.

Now, you aren't hiding it.

This is the secret to eternal life.

The writer will live on and in the next book he decides what characters to take with him.

How about that Hitler character?

Is he recurring?

Yeah.

Even in the current story people always bring it up.

The audience likes it.

I had to wait until I used that character in this story.

I don't want to overdo the joke.

So, you think Hitler is funny?

Sort of.

It's a theme throughout all my stories.

You are going to take Hitler into the next world.

Yeah.

In the dog world he will be a terrible dog owner, and all bad owners will be called Hitlers.

That works.

The writer will write a story about the writer and his 7 worlds.

Plus, how he wakes up in his own story.

All the adventures.

Your part of the story is when he wakes up and realizes who he is.

Then there is the struggle between Paul's ego and the writer's mind who is eternal.

Paul will try to convince the writer to take him along to his next story.

Paul's the only one in all myriads of life forms who could wake him up.

Paul's the alarm clock character.

Here comes the rooster.

You know he ain't going to die.

That's prophetic.

That one will live on like Hitler.

For sure.

So, there's Paul and Hitler in the next world.

Yes, so far.

I still must write the rest.

I have a good idea who is coming.

My 2 dogs for sure.

You had to give up your power as the ego mind to your darkness and trust you'd get it back.

That unlocks eternal life.

Level completed!

When does this end?

It doesn't.

Eternal life is good.

Yeah, a gold medal.

It's like getting a medal in fantasy sports for social commentary.

You're not even celebrating unlocking eternal life.

It's no big deal.

You find out you're an actor in the writer's play, however you can also figure out you are the writer.

There can be only one writer.

One Paul as well.

True.

You're one of a kind.

Paul is going to be bigger than Jesus.

That's an accomplishment.

Plus, you get to meet Hitler in the next story.

Right, because Paul is unique to this story and so he wouldn't have been around for all the previous incarnations of Hitler.

So, Paul gets a part in the next world.

Yes.

That's why it's about dogs.

You didn't think for 15 billion years you were literally going to watch a blind dog try to catch frogs in a pond?

I thought about it.

Weird and cute.

There will be a special place for dogs in the next story.

The way people think they ask for eternal life is from God, but God doesn't grant it.

It's the writer.

Paul never asked for it even when they sent him to church.

People go to church to ask for eternal life.

Why did you go?

I was pressured and then I played sports with them.

You never asked for eternal life from the church?

No, I didn't care.

I liked the Revelation story obviously.

That's because you have the writer in you.

Yeah, we are the closest.

I'd say Paul is actually you.

Could be.

Or it's Paul trying to fool the writer into taking him along.

Paul should be a fool.

Not only that, but he'd see through God, get to the writer, and then in his last act of true splendour he tries to fool the writer.

The writer acknowledges his greatness and fearlessness because he tries to fool the ultimate fool.

Well done.

Paul now knows about the mind that lives on forever.

Paul can go at any time.

Some in the audience want him gone.

I noticed.

He can go because he answered the eternal life question.

What's left?

There's always more.

You have all the answers you need.

Plus, I know not to choose.

I'm quite interesting if you get to know me.

This Paul is mostly in his mind, so he isn't a bother.

Paul is always figuring out the secrets to the universe.

He wants to keep exploring and extending this game.

The more he knows, the more he will bring into the next universe in his starring role as God.

Oh, nice.

Paul is God in the next universe.

Yes, he earned it.

Not only that, but he gets to pick the Goddess.

That's how much trust Paul has from the writer.

Are you sure?

He is a degenerate.

So am I.

It's okay.

He's an honourable degenerate and he has a good heart just like me.

The writer creates characters and then the actors ask for eternal life.

The writer takes the best, good or bad.

You try to act in 7 dramas at once to win the master of the drama prize.

Named of course after the great writer.

You'll never lose consciousness because you're the writer.

Paul will become God.

The writer is the other mind of God.

The game continues.

So, Paul gets the part of God.

How much does it pay?

Shouldn't he blow up?

Not if he keeps to himself.

You can be distant and an asshole, but I'm looking forward to what you bring to the role.

There is only one who is guaranteed eternal life in this story.

Yes, the writer.

He is needed.

It seems obvious if this is a story.

There can be only one writer.

Well, he can let others write some stuff.

You get to the mind state of the writer, and it dawns on you that you are eternal.

You see how he can make some of his characters eternal and some of the actors eternal.

I don't think any actors have been granted eternal life.

Jesus was sure he'd be back, but no one has seen him as of yet.

Well, he did the tomb trick.

Yeah, that was good.

How did he do it?

He made a deal with the writer.

He must have received a promise or something, why else would he say he is returning?

He's a narcissist and was deluded into thinking he'd be resurrected again.

The deal was one time, but he doesn't think that counts because it is part of the story, and he ascended to heaven and didn't stay.

He didn't specify he wanted to remain on earth.

He doesn't agree and says he should be back.

He's currently suing the writer.

Jesus is suing the writer of the story for breach of contract.

Who is the judge?

The audience is the jury.

They must reach everyone in the audience for their vote.

Everyone has to cast a vote for or against Jesus.

Well, Paul is coming back and this time playing God.

It's not only the character he played last time that is being resurrected but also that character takes on the role of God.

It will be the mediocre and flawed character of Paul becoming God.

That's a bad choice for God.

It's going to be a worse outcome than this last guy you got to play God.

I don't know, give him a chance.

He has some unorthodox views on dogs and the power of doing nothing.

It could be a good story.

Anyway, Paul has hit the trifecta.

King of the triple eternal life game.

He's the writer in disguise so he was already eternal.

His character of Paul will continue in the next story.

And as the actor, he will reprise that role of Paul and become God.

Only he can do it.

Clearly.

Are you sure this writer is not the Devil and tricking Paul?

The recurring Hitler character is a dead giveaway the writer is demented.

The writer is demented, and the Devil is one of his recurring characters.

You'll never get away from the Devil as long as you are in the writer's game.

By game, it is a story.

If this is madness, it is pretty cool.

Yeah, just shut up about it and it will be a constant source of amusement.

If you start talking about this then you'll send your strangeness quota through the roof.

That's good advice.

I'm good at keeping things to myself.

Yes, you are a mystery and deceitful.

Two excellent character traits as far as I'm concerned and since I'm the writer it's a winning combination.

Hey, I can see some exposure fantasies in this where you are outed as God.

Or thinking you're him.

Well, you haven't got the part yet; it's the next story.

So, keep it to yourself or all the other players will get pissed at you for not telling them.

I already wrote about getting to God.

Yes, but you wrote it in a dismissive way so the other contestants will think you are full of it.

That's true, the comments are in that tone.

Some thought you were a prick for believing that.

I've toned it down.

I can smile in knowing condescension towards others.

That will be satisfying enough.

mary magdalene

Twisted Mary Magdalene you kiss on the lips to transfer your wisdom and knowledge.
She braids her hair.
The story is her idea, and I write it.
She is the twisted one, not me.
I am sane and she is crazy.
She makes you crazy.
You are the only one who can handle her level of crazy.
I do tell myself that as well as her.

Do you think the prophets of antiquity were drug users?
That seems obvious though I doubt there was a stigma attached to the use of substances.
It was an accepted rite of passage for all humans.
The attempts to control who had access to them would be found in prohibitions against further prophecies and divination.
This led to the conflation of women, witches, and drugs.
Women would practice what was called pharmakeia in the Bible and were singled out as witches.
Men would use drugs for their fantastical tales of dragons and gods while women would use drugs to practice magic and ensnare.
Circe not only ensnared men, but also animals.
Yes, Homer wrote of the connection between women and drugs.
Odysseus was their main prize, and they took him away from family and civilization.
He had quite the adventure.
I am currently thinking Homer was warning men that a woman is a drug.
Do you think he was the world's first misogynist?
He is a contender.

There is a purported Mary Magdalene line of witches who escaped to France.
I could write that tale.
Everything will line up, and I will be the one who wakes Mary up to the realization of who she is.
She feels it when she sees pictures of Mary.
There's something about Mary.
Her hair is curly, she braids it, and likes to be witchy.
No one can tolerate her except for you.
You came along and fulfilled the prophecy.
I am special.
It's a Neo from the Matrix tie in as I always thought I was special.
Aren't I deluded?
In a sense you are.
If you maintain connection to your mundane life and society then these tales you tell are fantasies that exist in another world.
They are fairy tales.
However, you have been shown you can make them real; real as in believable and act out the drama.
You weave all the stories together and that is the craft of Tantra or in biblical parlance, a hairdresser who braids.
You can make the delusion come alive.
I guess in a way that would be vindication that I'm not crazy.
To traverse planes of consciousness is inviting in craziness as the lack of a concrete reality becomes too much for a human mind to handle.
So, how do I do it?
Return to this reality after you play out the story.
That's what happens to people - they lose touch with this reality.
For some, this requires a full stop, therapy, and rest.
They are then pronounced healed.
It sounds like a modern day exorcism.
Well, yes, Jesus cast the 7 demons out of Mary Magdalene.
Those 7 demons were the 7 stories in her head.
There are 7 levels of consciousness.
Well, there's an infinite amount but I understand you concentrate on 7 in order to get to a divine level of understanding.
Any more than 7 is unmanageable.
There are enough stories to craft within the 7.
Wouldn't I trigger stories in others?
You mean make them crazy?
Yes.
That's what you do, and they think you are fucking with their mind.
In a sense that's what I'm doing.
I'm not doing it maliciously, rather I'm showing them possibilities.
I'm of service.
That's your path of service.
You wake people up and show them stories.
Why did Jesus cast the 7 stories out of Mary Magdalene?
She was suffering from the knowledge.
He pushed her reset button and then took it slow.
Do you think he ever made a move on her?
He was a man.
He did but kept it quiet.
If anyone found out that would ruin his reputation.
Jesus' game was to get all of humanity to recognize him as the King after his death.
Once remembered by all, he could return.
That's his deal.
His story.
The Mary Magdalene affair sullies his reputation.
Why?
Because he banged a witch and a whore.
What's wrong with that?
It's not acceptable in society.
It still isn't.
You can't go around having affairs with witches.
But they are the best.
Yes, but they are off-limits to a holy man.
So, that's Jesus' secret?
Yes, if people knew they wouldn't remember and worship him anymore.
That's a good story.
The moral of the story is if you want to become ultra-holy like Jesus you will be attracted to whores.
Yes, you will hang out with them.
Then it becomes a mystery if you give in to temptation.
What's the temptation?
Women.
They are the greatest temptation known to man.
So, you are suggesting Mary Magdalene was the first femme fatale.
A power so great she felled the son of God.
Yeah, of course she would set her sights on the biggest catch and succeed.
I don't know, he's kept it quiet for this long and all we have are salacious rumours.
I don't think you give Jesus enough credit.
He was a player.
It makes for a great story.

Mary Magdalene gives you wisdom and knowledge.
Yes.
The understanding is a byproduct.
The path towards what it is you seek goes through a woman.
This woman is a witch.
When you see and understand this, you see the Goddess.
The Goddess is the other side of the witch.
You look up at the heavens and you see the Queen of Heaven.
It's Mary Magdalene.
Well, that's a fantastical tale.
Yes, it redeems me from my misogyny.
You just have to trust and stick with this writer until the end of the story.

portals

Approaching the exit portals of the Earth game leads to strange instances of symbols and thoughts telling you it is time to go.

There are magnetic attractors at the edge of the mystery sucking you into the completion of the level.

Yeah, it's very strange and mysterious.

If you get too close to the edge you will be sucked in.

Fall off the cliff of bodily existence.

If I was to guess at this game and the outcome, I would think the optimum strategy is to head to the portal when your time is near.

That would be following the flow.

When do you know your time is near?

When your body is giving out.

Your mind gets weaker.

Nobody knows when that is as sickness can topple you in the game at any time.

We try to maximize our time in the game and live to an old age but there are no guarantees.

Eventually, we all face dissolution of form, and the advice would be to accept it and when you are ready head to the portal of your choice.

There're two choices.

Yes.

Heaven or Hell.

Which one do you choose?

I believe my lessons are preparing me for that choice.

What have you learned?

Don't choose.

Tao.

Do nothing.

Or choose both.

I can lie on my deathbed and not choose.

That's the easy way out.

What if you wanted to choose both?

Well, I have a mind and a body.

I would guess that's how I choose both.

I have physically been to Heaven's Gate.

I have mentally journeyed into Hell.

I stayed at neither for long, but I know they are there.

You have seen the two portals.

Yes.

One is physical and one is mental.

What does that mean?

I'm scratching my head.

The body heads for the light and the mind returns to the darkness.

Why would you think that?

Because they are opposites.

The body is buried into the eternal darkness and the mind is released into the light.

Magic is through the reconciliation of the opposites as I have been taught.

When you leave this level, you reconcile your being.

The mind exits through the portal of Hell and continues, and the body will be reborn in the heavens.

Symbolically, you would blast your body off into the heavens.

Yeah.

How do you do that?

I wouldn't bury your body.

Self-combustion?

Something like that.

It's all in your head.

After you die, your body lies there helpless, and you must rely on others.

Yes, you don't want that.

That's a puzzle.

You will figure it out.

I'm picturing cremation and loading my ashes into a firework and blasting off.

That would work.

You'd have to find someone who will do that for you.

Doesn't Vilca do that?

Yes.

The image on don Howard's tapestry at his Mesa is describing the action.

That's the Raimondi stela.

Yes, that shows you what to do at the Mesa.

You have that on your Mesa.

Is that for the body or the mind?

What do you think?

It's for both.

What happens at the Mesa with Vilca?

You leave your body.

Where does your mind go?

At first the lower world, and then you ascend.

Correct.

You start at the bottom and climb.

Okay, that's the mind.

The mind is heading up so why would you start at the top?

Good point.

What does the body do?

It gets out of the way.

It heads down.

The body would exit at the top and come down.

The body would be high and the mind low.

They meet halfway.

Yes.

That's where I saw don Howard hanging out.

He waved.

That's fascinating.

What does that mean?

This world is magic.

The mind and body are balanced.

When you leave this world the mind and body are no longer balanced.

Heaven and Hell are places of the extreme.

It's cyclical so you will return to balance.

You return to Earth?

Not necessarily, you reincarnate into a body.

Got it.

Then you exit.

It's next level.

There are two portals which lead to the next level.

You don't choose one.

You go through both portals and that continues the journey.

Everyone else makes a choice of which portal to take.

You know the way and will take with you who you want to take into the next level.

That seems like a big responsibility.

It is but you can handle it.

How can I handle it?

Shut up about it and do your thing.

Come off as some crazy person with peculiar interests and idiosyncrasies.

If someone asks about your Mesa or what it is you are doing, you can tell them and scare the bejesus out of them.

I see that.

Well, thank you for the information.

No problem; you're a good student.

What is going on in this world?

Why?

There doesn't seem to be a meaning.

There isn't.

I think I've found the meaning.

What's that?

How to get to the next level.

That's the meaning of this level.

That's like a video game where the only point of the level is to get to the next level.

It's absurd.

Video games are absurd.

You keep entering different levels.

Some are hard and some are easy.

It's telling that when we create the ability to make games our games mimic existence.

It seems very logical when you think about it.

Of course we would mirror our predicament into a video game.

There are 7 levels, right?

Yeah.

The Raimondi stela shows you that as well.

What level is this?

6th.

How do you know?

You don't.

Then why 6?

I know the 7th level is a reward in the game where I can create my own level.

How do you know that?

Intuition.

I don't know if that's the case, but I have a good idea that is what is going to happen.

What are you going to create?

A world for dogs.

I'm going to be God in that world.

Yes, you will be the dog God.

Fauci will be the dogs' Hitler.

Definitely.

Why is this world difficult?

It's because there is no meaning.

The difficulty in this level is that you go around looking for meaning and never find it.

You think you find meaning but then it evaporates.

Yes.

Everything vanishes.

You think the meaning is to love all and then you look for love in return.

You end up suffering so then you think the meaning is to suffer.

Eventually, you can figure out there is no meaning in this world.

The meaning is no meaning.

You create your own meaning.

It's a blank slate.

You become the creator.

The writer.

You are given the pen in this level to create the way out into the next level.

Remember, there is no meaning.

In a way this 6th level is the hardest because it's purgatory.

You are trapped in a world without meaning.

The puzzle is to find a way out.

The way out is to create meaning.

Your life is the way you create meaning and as you have stumbled upon this idea, you realize you create a story that leads to the 7th level.

To get to the 7th level you must create that meaning.

That's the meaning of this level.

I swear I'm not high.

Confirmed.

Where are the portals?

My first thought is up and down.

Go up to Heaven and descend into Hell.

What have you been taught?

East is birth and west is death.

The ancient Egyptians called it the Akhet.

It is the Goddess.

On the Giza plateau are the three pyramids and the Sphinx.

The Sphinx faces east and there was probably another one facing west.

The Goddess is present with the sycamore trees.

What's in the west?

The future.

The east?

The past.

Where do you come from?

Both.

I'm in the future and merge with the past.

I see that; I'm not sure I can explain it.

Who is in the future?

The writer writing the story.

You can't write the story in the past.

It's already happened.

Makes sense.

Who is the past?

The child.

Why?

They must start somewhere.

They are the sum of the past.

Who is the child?

Eros.

Lust?

Yeah.

You are writing the story of a child.

Where does the story come from?

The Goddess.

I think I'm getting off topic.

What's the topic?

The portals of east and west.

Mind and body.

The body enters through the portal of the east and the mind through the portal of the west.

They converge in the now and this is this level.

The body leaves in the west and the mind exits in the east.

The mind is reborn in the next level in the east while the body becomes the mind in the west.

That's a twist.

It signifies in the next level your mind becomes the body, and your body becomes the mind.

Subconscious becomes conscious while conscious becomes subconscious.

There's two within you and you take turns incarnating.

I know of the two and we share the mind and body.

The balance between us two is magic.

You can see where this is going.

Yes, it's next level.