weaving duality

I have the ability to confound and confuse with the games I play within my mind. I can walk the edge of sanity and invite the ideas swirling within my mind to come together and reveal universal truths.

Maybe I’m the one who is not real? Maybe I spent all my life denying my inner life and burying it in order that I could come forth and greedily soak up this incarnation. Maybe I should be the one in the darkness? Perhaps I’m the illegitimate one. Maybe I’m the parasite? It’s an interesting way to look at my incarnation. This once again brings me back to the story of Jacob and Esau in the Old Testament. Jacob is the one who came forth and took all the honours away from his twin brother Esau, who was portrayed as a hairy and stupid beast. When Jacob was fleeing Laban for his life, Laban being the father of Jacob's moon goddess wives Rachel and Leah, he was also running from the collective forces of Esau, who were coming to kill him. Jacob knew he was a deceitful thief and hadn’t reconciled with Esau, his shadow. I have a pretty good mystical grasp of the Bible so let me pull out a few verses from Genesis chapter 25 in the King James Version which is describing the birth of the twins Esau and Jacob to illustrate what I’m getting at here.

25 And the first came out red, all over like an hairy garment; and they called his name Esau.

26 And after that came his brother out, and his hand took hold on Esau's heel; and his name was called Jacob: and Isaac was threescore years old when she bare them.

The shadow is the firstborn and the alpha. If you dissect the etymology of Hebrew words used to describe Esau you’ll find they link back to the idea of an ‘eleph that is derivative of the ‘aleph; the symbol for the bull who represents the coursing power of the alpha male which is called the Ka in ancient Egypt and represented in that civilization as well by the bull. Ultimately, there is an untold story here that is describing a hidden power deep within all men that originally came forth first as the life force and through our cunning we took control and buried him in order to keep this adventure all to our self and burdened the redman with the appellation of demon. Later, in Genesis chapter 25 is described a situation where Jacob tricks Esau into giving up his firstborn birthright.

29 And Jacob sod pottage: and Esau came from the field, and he was faint:

30 And Esau said to Jacob, Feed me, I pray thee, with that same red pottage; for I am faint: therefore was his name called Edom.

31 And Jacob said, Sell me this day thy birthright.

32 And Esau said, Behold, I am at the point to die: and what profit shall this birthright do to me?

33 And Jacob said, Swear to me this day; and he sware unto him: and he sold his birthright unto Jacob.

34 Then Jacob gave Esau bread and pottage of lentiles; and he did eat and drink, and rose up, and went his way: thus Esau despised his birthright.

Wow. This knowledge starts to unravel the idea of the sacrifice of the firstborn. In order to claim kingship over self, I sacrificed the firstborn and took his birthright. Later, Jacob deceives his father Isaac into granting him the blessing of the firstborn in order to become a great nation, as Isaac nears death in chapter 27.

6 And Rebekah spake unto Jacob her son, saying, Behold, I heard thy father speak unto Esau thy brother, saying,

7 Bring me venison, and make me savoury meat, that I may eat, and bless thee before the Lord before my death.

8 Now therefore, my son, obey my voice according to that which I command thee.

9 Go now to the flock, and fetch me from thence two good kids of the goats; and I will make them savoury meat for thy father, such as he loveth:

10 And thou shalt bring it to thy father, that he may eat, and that he may bless thee before his death.

11 And Jacob said to Rebekah his mother, Behold, Esau my brother is a hairy man, and I am a smooth man:

12 My father peradventure will feel me, and I shall seem to him as a deceiver; and I shall bring a curse upon me, and not a blessing.

13 And his mother said unto him, Upon me be thy curse, my son: only obey my voice, and go fetch me them.

Because of the discovered deceit, Esau vows to kill Jacob.

42 And these words of Esau her elder son were told to Rebekah: and she sent and called Jacob her younger son, and said unto him, Behold, thy brother Esau, as touching thee, doth comfort himself, purposing to kill thee.

The situation comes to a head in chapter 32 as Jacob is returning from his exile where he had stayed with Laban and his two daughters for 14 years.

6 And the messengers returned to Jacob, saying, We came to thy brother Esau, and also he cometh to meet thee, and four hundred men with him.

7 Then Jacob was greatly afraid and distressed: and he divided the people that was with him, and the flocks, and herds, and the camels, into two bands;

9 And Jacob said, O God of my father Abraham, and God of my father Isaac, the Lord which saidst unto me, Return unto thy country, and to thy kindred, and I will deal well with thee:

11 Deliver me, I pray thee, from the hand of my brother, from the hand of Esau: for I fear him, lest he will come and smite me, and the mother with the children.

Jacob is delivered after spending the night wrestling with the angel of God who gives him the name Israel. The angel of God is a manifestation of the alpha male power that all heroes must contend with at some point in their journey if they are to be successful. 

My own experience suggests because whom we call the demon within can become your teacher, there is a co-dependency rooted in the dual nature of existence. I now know with clarity “I”, my bifurcated self, has two masculine polarities and I bury one of them and identify with the other. It’s a lot easier to understand what the ancient Egyptians were trying to teach with the stories of Horus and Set and what the Quariwari shamans of the pre-Columbian Andes were describing with tinkuy and taking the two halves of the man and reconciling them into the centre. In the ancient lore of India, it is the god Shiva who is this destructive power within man. Curiously, Shiva has a Datura leaf in his headdress and from my experiences in the Amazon I know of this Datura plant that they call toé and its ability to take you deep into the darkness of self.

I educated myself in the mythology of ancient Egypt as a casual perusal of my earlier blog posts certainly attests. I was fascinated by the rivalry between Horus and Set and the iconic story told about their conflict which is called, “The Contendings of Horus and Set.” The esoteric meaning embedded into this tale is this struggle for mastery within the man. He comes forth by day as the light in the guise of the hero Horus but the journey is not smooth sailing at all as the shadow, represented by the red and powerful beast Set, is intent on claiming kingship for himself. Thus, from the moment Horus comes into this world there is conflict between the two that is said to last 80 years. In other words, our whole life. Ancient Egypt was at its strongest and in its imperial glory when Set and Horus were united as the tying together of the Sema represents.

Set and Horus tying together the Sema

Within the iconography found throughout the land of ancient Kemet are curious images of the union of these two contending powers. The great god Harakhty of the double horizon who ushers in the light and the darkness speaks to this idea. Egypt became weak and eventually was overrun by foreign invaders after they ran Set out of the kingdom as those in power did not recognize the strength with which he imbued the nation and instead blamed all calamities on his influence. 

Ultimately, the ancient Egyptians were cognizant of this psychological split within the psyche of man but projected it onto royalty and left the commoner to a fate where they would never see the light. This split is discovered within an eternal conflict between two spheres of duality competing for rule over the psychic self which the ancient Egyptians mythologized in their story of the conflict between brothers struggling for the kingship of the land. This destiny is within us all; not just exclusively the purview of kings and queens. 

I have taken all the glory for myself on this path of awakening when in retrospect I’ve seen the split over and over again and am cognizant of the need for reconciliation and power sharing. I am everything. I am god. I am two. I’m Horus and Set. I’m Horus come forth but it is Set who is the power god of this world. I awaken and reclaim my kingdom yet I only have a share in it. In wholeness I truly am God, the dark and the light fully integrated, and that is the journey ahead where I see the blueprint and my destiny that awaits. It is only through the reconciliation of my consciousness which has come forth and the energetic tour de force that lays within that I reclaim my birthright and is a recognition that the two of us together is the reconstitution of God.

God is the sum of the light and the dark. This idea is perfect in that it is us who brings God forth through the reconciliation of our very nature. Reconciliation of duality brings us to God. I have come forth as the light but at the expense of the power I left buried in the shadow. I am Horus or as the Greeks equated him, Apollo. It’s no accident that upon alteration of my consciousness and descending into my very depths this buried power mocked me by loudly whispering, “Apollo, Apollo, Apollo” and then watching me run. This is the eternal struggle and within myth it is all found, hidden in plain sight. The names and the faces change but the drama retains its flavour. Dionysos is the great actor and keeps Apollo from losing himself in his narcissism. At the great oracle temple of Delphi, it is Apollo who grants the gift of prophecy to the Pythia during the ascendance of the vernal equinox; however, it is in the darkness of the winter months that Dionysos reclaims the temple and the surrounding mountains along with his followers, the maenads and satyrs, who celebrate our true nature in an orgy of sensual pleasure.

Now, I know what I have recounted here is very male-centric and does not touch on the destiny of the woman. There’s a good reason why and it is because I’m a man. I don’t know what a woman is struggling with. I view the pinnacle of womanhood as the Great Goddess and I owe the trajectory of my life to her grace. I am sure she is reflected in all women; in fact, she has told me so; however, I don’t know how that is reconciled within the woman. As a man, I know of my psychological split and the need to reconcile the two great powers at the fount of my being and once perfected I become ready for the grand reunion of divine feminine and divine masculine which in mythology is called the Hieros gamos. 

I am content with my discoveries and how I can weave all my knowledge into a coherent thread that I understand. I see the coalescing of world mythology into an overarching theme pointing at a great power within and going on a hero’s journey to write the rest of the story. Take the step and watch your world come alive.

return to ancient Egypt

The main reason I started writing in this blog space was a fascination with ancient Egypt due to my obsession with their religious beliefs. As I have progressed along my own spiritual path, it has remained a bedrock for me though I have followed a trajectory that has led me towards other civilizations and their myths and archetypes; all which I have found useful as I formed my own beliefs. I am actually a little bit proud I never fell for any of the systems out there in the spiritual supermarket trying their best to pull me in but instead focused on developing my own story and version of the truth of existence. I wouldn’t take my word for it or even believe what I have to tell you but as a narrative of my own construction I am quite content with all I have learnt and now understand. It’s quite amazing that here I am over twelve years later and I’ve circled back to ancient Egypt because of just how profound is the myth of Horus and Set. The ancient Egyptian ideas of the Ba and the Ka, as represented by the warring deities Horus and Set, have been a constant on this path I travel. The iconic ancient Egyptian narrative of this mythic battle called, ‘The Contendings of Horus and Set’ lays bare the inner psychological battle for mastery between the light and the dark that manifests into your everyday life.

The Greeks defined this dualistic notion of the conceptions of life as bios and zoë. Biological life is the idea behind the resurrection and the new sprouting grain at the beginning of the growing season. It is victory over death that has become the heart of a great deal of religious traditions in the west. This power in ancient Egypt is inherent in Osiris, who is killed by his brother - this monster Set, and then is resurrected in order to impregnate his wife Isis, who in turn births the son Horus. Horus grows up and battles Set in order to avenge his father as well as battle for the crown of his father. This story is enacted over and over again in the cultural milieu of ancient Egypt. The son Horus becomes the father and impregnates the mother who gives birth to the renewal of life and the chain of heredity lives on in the Pharaoh, warts and all. This power inherent in Osiris is then subjugated to the underground realm and gives impetus to the renewal and coming forth of all biological life. Where you find the presence of the conditions for life in combination with indestructible life, the zoë, you will have the rise of biological life.

 

In the myth, why does Set kill Osiris? If Set is the personification of the indestructible life force why does he naturally kill Osiris as representative of biological life? It is because the power of Set propels creation along through motion which creates the illusion of time. Time is lethal to all biological life. All forms, harbingers of biology, disintegrate through natural decay.

 

Humans are greedy, needy, and want to cling to this transient life we lead. The truth and conception of biological life is perverted in western religion into a concept of a resurrection of the body and subsequent immortality. That’s not science! Isn’t that funny; I’m invoking science into religion, ha ha. No, seriously, when biological life expires then the conception of who you are is dead. Kaput. See ya. The energy pattern that defines you in biological terms, if it is to continue on, will do so in your offspring and so forth. Your progeny carries on with your energy pattern, along with all your ancestors. That is undeniably biological life. For some that is a blessing and for some it is a curse.

 

That sounds cool but what about me? I want to live forever! You already do. You’re indestructible. Each biological manifestation of your Ka is called in ancient Egypt your double made from your master Ka. This is the zoë or as the ancient Egyptians called it, the Ka. It is represented by the ridiculously strong, powerful, and magical god Set. In the myths, Set is fighting for supremacy with the representatives of the Ba power who are Osiris and Horus. Eventually, Set is defeated and forced to leave the empire. What is surprising is this is reflected culturally in Egypt at the time as the downfall of their 3000-year empire. Seriously, when Set became anathema to Egyptian society, it eventually fell apart and collapsed. So, what is this power? It’s the life force that gives rise to all forms created by the feminine creative power. Where and how do I find and recognize this power? It’s your shadow; that voice deep within that is your master teacher, misunderstood and relegated to the demonic, that is teaching you to become the ultimate warrior through stress and challenge. He has no qualms about killing you if he must because he knows life is indestructible. Why do I want this? What’s in it for me? You want to live forever, right? This is your vehicle to enable that. Your shadow, the master teacher, is your boat that will sail you on into eternity and beyond. That’s right you can live on in perpetuity in two modalities: through bios and zoë. The ancient Egyptians even recognized this combination and called it the Akh.

 

It is a luminous being; today we would recognize it as a concept of enlightenment. What is being shown in this iconography is the merging of bios and zoë into a new power. From my standpoint, it looks like a conception of how to achieve conscious eternal life. The reason I say that is it seems that biological life is conscious but perishable. Indestructible life, the zoë, is subconscious and uses biological life to gain a foothold into consciousness. In the advanced thinking of the spiritual masters of ancient Egypt, they seem to have envisioned a vehicle that combines the two.

 

It presents to me with an interesting conception of the word enlightenment that we throw around nowadays. If you’re awake, preach love, and declare we are all one that usually gets you into the E-club though some celebrity and followers help back up your claim. Sorry about my sarcasm here. Anyways, I’m intrigued by this conception of enlightenment that my spiritual journey and probing into understanding what life is all about has unearthed. What do I know? It took me a while to admit it but I’m fully comfortable with the demon within; I’m bipolar and I have progressed in my journey from being scared and wanting to get rid of him into understanding he is my master teacher who means well in a very peculiar way. He’s transforming me into the ultimate warrior. So, I can see now that if we are to combine into this luminous being, he needs to forge steel out of the raw material I gave him to work with.

 

A favourite intellectual game of mine is to challenge prejudices and hierarchies. The life force is dominant and biological life cannot exist without this power. Because of this knowledge, my natural inclination is to believe that the king is the life force. Shouldn’t Set be one up on both Osiris and Horus in the ancient Egyptian pantheon because he is not subject to death? Not so fast… The life force is indestructible power however to come forth as self-aware it requires the manifestation of biological life. This is how the energy expresses itself and because the energy is a pulse, biological life by nature repeatedly comes and goes into consciousness. Biological life coming forth thus births two entries into conscious form: The bios and the zoë, imagined in ancient Egypt as the brothers Osiris and Set. To play the game they need each other. Without each other they are but potential. This is one of my favourite images from ancient Egypt, found in the Papyrus Jumilhac, because it explains so much. The bull depicted here is the life force as Set and this powerful animal is carrying Osiris as biological life. The two are exoterically opposed but secretly in the esoteric mystery, they need each other. In the far left panel is the son Horus with his father Osiris to his left, inert on a bier. Horus stands on a hippopotamus with his spear in dominant fashion. The hippo represents Set. The image is reminding us how we use the life force to give rise to our biological form and then subjugate and bury this power henceforth why I found it buried within the shadow. The middle frame shows Osiris without his phallus; the phallus being the representative of the masculine life force power.

Indulge me if you will because I want to show you how this myth is my story and it’s your story.

 

The masculine voice that talks to you when altering your consciousness is your shadow; it’s the hidden and indestructible zoë. The nature of psychedelics that is among the most frightening experiences within this human existence, at least for me, is the ability to access the darkness that lies within. There’s nothing to prepare you for it; nor can I try and explain or teach you how to approach this aspect of self. We all will react differently as a first timer. The game is on. It’s a game that can last years if the initial foray is not game over for you. Running from the fear is totally understandable. Fighting back is heroic. Understanding what is going on is next level. Suffice to say, this entity is your master teacher. Do with this information what you will. Approach with caution.

 

Some of my early Ayahuasca visions and encounters make a lot of sense now almost eight years later. My first foray into the unknown was an encounter with the sacred feminine who wanted me to come away with her. I understand it now as motherly instinct to protect; knowing that what I was going up against could kill me so she wanted to shield me from this situation. When I protested and said I was not done with my earthly incarnation and voyage, she offered me a cloak of protection against my enemies and told me I could call on her at any time. I didn’t know what she meant or why she was offering these items. The second ceremony I quickly learned why as the darkness came and steamrolled me. It was the worst night of my life; a thorough beat down. The third ceremony, the masculine voice came again and showed me paths: Paths to power and a path out of this predicament where I would just drop the idea of plant medicines. I declined the path to power and ran home where I mulled my options. I like adventure and I like knowledge. The fear activated within counselled me to drop the plant medicine path; my inner fortitude beckoned me to continue.

 

I enlisted the help of the Goddess and got up off the mat. Slowly, I regained my composure and set off to once again engage the subconscious. On came the attacks; the fits of panic and doubt; and the thoughts to stay away from the experience. I returned and I battled. Once I got a leg up, was a vision where the Goddess told me to take up my sword and go after this darkness. She then revealed this darkness was her husband and he kept her locked away in this castle made of gold. I made plans to defeat this enemy, eventually concluding the enemy was a part of me. I also couldn’t understand why she married this guy in the first place? I think there was a Star Wars moment in here somewhere where I realized the darkness was my father and I came to defeat him. I kept developing my new-found strength and soon within a ceremony I transformed into a jaguar, thus revealing that within me was now the recognition and available power of the life force along with my biological life. One of the most important concepts I learned on this path to power was to open the heart and run everything through the heart. This is paramount and without these lessons power will destroy you.

 

From this point forward in time, I had mastered fear and a four-year period ensued where I developed an amazing clarity of this game. The culmination occurred in the last few months where I put all the pieces together; added it all up and realized this darkness within, the shadow, is the master teacher and the holder of a vast reservoir of power available to me if I so choose to take it. The master teacher gives lessons in becoming a man, a warrior, and is a fount of wisdom. As I said earlier in this piece, it is through biological life that the zoë manifests. It is through my vessel that the master can transmit his traits. He does it through jaguar training school. If you choose to enrol, it can become a game of life and death and there are no training wheels to be offered. I can’t recommend it because it can be deadly.

 

It is hard to accept what I have learned on this path I chose. I became a man of knowledge and this knowledge can be a little unnerving and hard to both acquire and come to terms with. Cultural indoctrination runs deep and the natural inclination is to deny what you are being shown. My run in with my buried shadow, a man stomped out by culture, I never expected to turn out this way. He was a bad man who scared the shit out of me. I was shocked to learn of his identity and to learn of his methods for teaching me to become a warrior. To be like the master.

 

So, that my friends is the journey where the Ka, as the life force, uses the Ba for the manifestation into consciousness of its power. The relationship is symbiotic and necessary in order for actualization of the potential that lies within the life force. It’s why as a teacher this power is relentless and accepts only mastery. Who you may think is your greatest enemy could be in fact your greatest teacher. A previously unfathomable outcome is now within reach.

 

I returned to the teachings of the sages of ancient Egypt from a time long ago because as the knowledge turns into understanding I have come to realize that what they taught is what I have independently verified. The myths of Horus of Set and their constant fighting mirrors my own internal struggle and recently I was able to separate it out into the bipolar nature of my being that were in essence my biological life and the universal life force behind life which the Greeks called bios and zoë and from a masculine point of view are the Greek Apollo and Dionysos. What the masters of ancient Egypt taught was you can harmonize these two into one called an Akh. I haven’t reached that point and I can’t verify if it is true however I have no reason to not believe them because what they have taught up until now on my path has been remarkably the real deal, if you can understand metaphor and throw off cultural misconceptions. When I researched this concept of Akh further, I came across the identification of the bird to which it was most likely referring and that bird is a heron. Observing a heron in the wild you will notice its call is a penetrating, “ack, ack, ack.” I’ve heard it before and I have commented to myself it sounds like a dinosaur. Anyway, as my understanding increases the omens take form. Around the pond where I walk the dog at night, a heron has taken up residence, calls out in the night time sky, “ack, ack, ack,” and glides to its nest over top of me. Of course it does, I thought to myself. I’m on the verge of its secret.

 

The butterfly comes forth from the caterpillar in this lifetime. It is interesting to project this transformation out among say many lifetimes and think about our own lives. If you view our energetic form as constructed as eternal then reincarnation into different biological containers becomes a plausible idea. What would be the purpose behind reincarnation? For fun and adventure? Possibly. Desire? That’s a big one. Or are they all elements of the game and the game is transformation along the lines of the example set by the butterfly. Eventually, we will transform our biological impetus in combination with the eternal life force that powers us up into the shining radiant entity called the Akh. Perhaps this is all fanciful speculation but I do know the butterfly is the most common symbol I come across when I access altered states of consciousness. Its behaviour must be pointing me towards something I can figure out the more knowledge I synthesize on this incredible journey.

avatars of consciousness

Consciousness is what is. Our universe is the result of mental processes which I can explain by metaphor such as the dreaming mind that creates worlds. Our individual capacity to do this is primitive; imagine mastering dreaming, which at this point of proficiency would be having control over your projection of consciousness. With this ability as the creator, you can create innumerable worlds designed to challenge or entertain and within these worlds we would naturally leave avatars for the perceptive among us to make the connection back to source, as the actions of these symbols leave undeniable clues for the initiated. The mystery can’t be mysterious without these subtle clues; instead, it is just forever unknown and well, where’s the fun in that game? Consciousness as a singularity further consists of two opposites, the divine feminine and masculine polarities. The feminine creates form and the masculine is the magical energy that brings the form alive. To conceptualize this, here’s an image of a serpent and a jaguar.

In this sublime metaphor, you can see the serpent body created the form of our universe. Within that form roams the jaguar as the primal energy who lights up this world. The jaguar is the life force. In ancient Egypt, its raw form was known as the Ka and the personification of its magical properties in the deity Heka; in the Indus Valley it is the composite power of the seven chakras caressed by the kundalini serpent, and in the Far East it is known as Qi; energy that resides and emanates from our spinal cord.

The plant medicine Huachuma is a potentiator of the life force to a level where you feel within its pulsing presence. The biggest variable in working with the energy load of Huachuma is set and setting and it’s exponentially amplified; as a consequence, the biggest factor of the experience includes where and who you are hanging around with for the day because what happens is you magnify your energy while others are amplifying their energy. The abundance of energy present within the natural setting also becomes apparent. If you can find a harmonic convergence with nature or someone else’s energy then magic happens. It took me a while to figure that out; I have always felt it but I never added up the pieces until experiencing it this recent trip. I can now understand this phenomenon can occur by grasping the love exuded within your environment as well as a shared interest between a group of people. While there is mutual attraction and synergy while drinking Huachuma, energy fields collide and harmonize, and it can be pretty intense.

Huachuma gives you the key to heaven. That statement has a hidden meaning because humans like to take things literally and will look for a door to heaven. We all fall for it. Huachuma will get you high and eventually give you this key to open the door and that’s all you got to do! I’ll be honest with anyone who asks about the key however I would kind of like to leave it at saying it gives you the key to heaven and let whomever embarks on that path to figure it out for themselves because it is how I was taught. You are given a clue but lack understanding as it takes a while to put all into practice. I can tell you what the key is however until you experience it for yourself it will not compute. For instance, I started drinking Huachuma five years ago. Three times each in 2015 and 2016 and then five ceremonies in 2017. I had a a two and a half year absence until this recent trip where I participated in six ceremonies and as a result, the sum total of all the ceremonies eventually allowed me to understand the key.

Humans and their mental activities are peculiar. There is so much truth to what we intuitively perceive and also what we experience when we perturb our consciousness vibration by only the slightest amount and enter a different reality. The realms of heaven and hell that our culture of logic and reason have discarded, do in fact exist. So does god and the devil. In fact, I’d be bold enough to state that in heaven you meet god and in hell you meet the devil but they are the same dude and that dude is you. Within, we carry these archetypes that constantly re-appear within the culture no matter where we plant our flag. Indeed, Huachuma gives you the key to enter into either of these realms.

My recent trip to Peru was another touchstone along this never ending path to who knows where. The plant medicine teacher Huachumon instructs with the light touch of a feather. A day with Huachuma can be pretty magical however you are given the choice in how you want to proceed. If you wish to be miserable then you can drown in your sorrows. Your state of mind or to put it bluntly, your lack of a state of mind is the key. I had done my fair share of work with Huachuma over five years and have always found the experience to have peaks and valleys where I vacillate between euphoric feelings of an all pervasive cosmic love, connection, and unity to a crashing down into the hell realms. As a beginner, you naturally assign these states to the effects of the medicine. I followed a similar progression with Ayahuasca, starting when I became very paranoid the second time I drank and had a bad trip. Instead of recognizing that the plant was revealing the paranoia within, I assigned one of the effects of Ayahuasca as inducing paranoia. Isn’t that one of the great things about this whole journey? It’s an advanced level course in self-discovery where your prejudices slowly crumble before you and you see it all starts with your own bad self.

My experiences with Huachuma have been similar. I was always slightly dismayed by the hell regions I would get pulled into that would send my mind into a feedback loop that was hard to snap out of in short order. The lesson kept repeating until finally I got it! It was me and it was a choice. The darkness lay within and if I wanted to embrace it then it came forth. All I had to do was choose love. It was so simple, yet the feather of instruction had to become as heavy as a hammer in order to drive home this realization. I remember it vividly when it happened: We were swimming in a tributary off the main Amazon river, which is an enchanted slice of heaven in the jungle which never disappoints. The sun was shining and the ambiance was perfect. I floated on the river and felt the waves of bliss. I swam towards the riverbank as a cloud covered the sun and the light-level dipped. A sharp turn in my outlook ensued and my thoughts once again turned dark. I caught myself right away before the dalliance with my shadow and knew it didn’t have to be like this. I embraced love again and looked up at the trees as the cloud cleared and the sunlight streamed through the leaves of the trees. Just then, a flock of exquisite butterflies passed by overhead. They were an obvious sign that I finally got it. Later, in the Andes mountains on this latest trip, at the Chavin temple the butterflies returned, showing me the intricate nature and harmonization of the energy as two butterflies flew together in lockstep with such grace and poise. The divine feminine is such a maestra at taking raw energy and creating such displays of beauty.

I recently came upon something I had read over seven years ago by a neurologist who had gone into a seven-day coma after contracting meningitis. Upon regaining waking consciousness, he was able to describe quite vividly his experience while in this altered state. The most striking thing I read concerned this woman who escorted him through these realms, who assured him he was loved, and had nothing to worry about. She was curiously surrounded by an innumerable amount of butterflies. I thought to myself, I know this woman. I have met her many times and she is the reason I always return to that land beyond shared consensus reality.

It gets stranger still. For most of my journey, someone else was with me. A woman. She was young, and I remember what she looked like in complete detail. She had high cheekbones and deep-blue eyes. Golden brown tresses framed her lovely face. When first I saw her, we were riding along together on an intricately patterned surface, which after a moment I recognized as the wing of a butterfly. In fact, millions of butterflies were all around us—vast fluttering waves of them, dipping down into the woods and coming back up around us again. It was a river of life and color, moving through the air. The woman’s outfit was simple, like a peasant’s, but its colors—powder blue, indigo, and pastel orange-peach—had the same overwhelming, super-vivid aliveness that everything else had. She looked at me with a look that, if you saw it for five seconds, would make your whole life up to that point worth living, no matter what had happened in it so far. It was not a romantic look. It was not a look of friendship. It was a look that was somehow beyond all these, beyond all the different compartments of love we have down here on earth. It was something higher, holding all those other kinds of love within itself while at the same time being much bigger than all of them.

https://evolutionnews.org/2012/10/near_death_expe_1/

I have had plant medicine ceremonies that we read about in the literature and think to yourself, "wow I want to have that vision." I have transformed into a jaguar. I have been in the presence of a giant boa constrictor who wrapped itself lovingly around me. I have gone into the hell realms and scared myself shitless. I have been to the castle made of gold and been welcomed by the Goddess. I have experienced a bliss like no other and met beings composed of nothing more than love and light. Through it all, the one thing that has remained constant is the presence of the butterfly. It’s the link between my ordinary world of perception and the visionary.

indestructible life

It’s important to study mythology and the goddesses and gods if you are a seeker of wisdom and knowledge. Contained within these myths, are wisdom bombs that withstand the test of time and are a check against the obfuscation of language and culture. The indestructible life force behind the body and powering you up is the eternal energy that just is. The Greeks had a word for it, called zoë, which they differentiated from individual biological life of a perishable nature which they called bios. This speaks towards the importance of language and the different meanings of life that we have lost that were ingrained into the Greek mind. This same situation pops up again with our conception of love which we leave as a catch all and depend on modifiers to describe how we are feeling. The Greeks in turn, used multiple and differing words all related to the core concept of love, that related precisely to the specific feeling whether it be romantic love, brotherly love, a mother’s love, unconditional love, and so on.

It is a good exercise to open the mind. My English language steers me in the direction of thinking about life with just the one meaning and that it begins and ends with my biological body and I treat everyone as an individual who concentrates life within their own personal biosphere. I don’t ever give thought to a power behind all life that gives rise to everything and is the arcing presence behind the creation of life because language shields me from this way of thinking. I don’t feel immortal because I have little exposure to a legitimate concept that bestows immortality upon us however there is a force that is indestructible and it is the power behind everything; an energy which the Greeks called zoë.

You can’t kill or destroy this power. A gun does nothing. You can’t stomp it out or burn it. You can try and tear it to pieces but it just adopts a new form or reforms. It lies behind all and is forever coming and going in a cycle of creation and destruction, vibrating in a constant transformational flux. Zoë uses the power of the Goddess to keep reappearing. The feminine is the creator that gives birth to recurring biological forms, allowing the divine actor to take the stage once again and perform the dance of life. The life form is the vehicle for zoë to reappear in our world; the ever-changing and transformational glory of indestructible life.

In my never ending journey on a ship of fools, I’m starting to understand this power called zoë. My biological body is a finite structure animated by this power. This eternal power doesn’t expire and is forever pulsing with a huge amount of energy. It’s the body that eventually slows down and has trouble accessing the power. There is an advantage to this slowing down though as awareness increases and you can sit with yourself and get a feel for what is happening: to you and all around you. I was walking on a path in the woods yesterday and came across a patch of overgrowth that had all these bees and deer flies buzzing about. I knew that was the power concentrated in a little insect and the buzz was the sound of the energy. It was popping, zinging, and having a glorious time. I felt like I was in the midst of a day with Huachuma, with my senses alive and noticing all this wonder. A butterfly came into my view and the majestic fluttering while riding the wind gave me a glimpse of the artistry contained within this power.

It got me thinking about how I have encountered this power in my mythological studies. The ancient Egyptian Heb Sed festival stands out as a celebration of the virility of the Pharaoh. He shows off his strength and concludes this display by maintaining an erection and masturbating to completion. For real! They had an elaborate ceremony for this act. The ability to prove he is still virile is a testament to the power still coursing through him. There is a depiction in a tomb of a courtier of Amenhotep III that describes a renewal of the Pharaoh’s power in which the starry serpent of the sky, as the goddess Hathor, is invoked in order to propitiate the continued strength of the king through granting him this much needed power. I also remembered in Lao Tzu's ancient Chinese Tao Te Ching, the passage where the power is being described as coming forth pure in the erection of an infant male.

Being full of power is like being a baby.

Scorpions don’t sting, tigers don’t attack, eagles don’t strike.

Soft bones, weak muscles, but a firm grasp.

Ignorant of the intercourse of man and woman, yet the baby penis is erect.

True and perfect energy!

All day long screaming and crying, but never getting hoarse.

True and perfect harmony! To know harmony is to know what’s eternal.

To know what’s eternal is enlightenment.

Increase of life is full of portent: the strong heart exhausts the vital breath.

The full-grown is on the edge of age. Not the Way.

Lao Tzu: Tao Te Ching, A Book about the Way and the Power of the Way – Ursula K. Le Guin

To know what’s eternal is enlightenment! Plant medicine teachers reveal the eternal and the homework is to understand it. Then you know. Additionally, how much is our sexuality connected and tied to this power and why does it makes us feel so alive? I thought of how zoë enlivens our bodies and gives us that feeling of strength and virility; personified by the ancient Olympian and the modern decathlete. Also, the bodybuilder who takes this power and shapes it in the human form. Plus, the artist who creates and the scientist who discovers by accessing the creativity, wonder, and wisdom within this power. I also wondered about how the power is taking this amalgamation of flesh and bone and granting it the charge needed to act. I thought of how we can express this power and how it manifests within creation. In the jaguar, you see in the ferocity of the animal this power and in the fur the patterns displaying its savage grandeur. The flower coming forth is the grace inherent in life. The eyeball and its exquisite intricacy and stunning beauty defy words.

This power is mostly hidden. It’s always there with us but for the most part we are oblivious to it and once again because of language we never think about it or go looking for it. There are ways to access it however and in order to re-introduce yourself to this power you have to find a way to change your consciousness. I know of a few methods. A surefire way to directly access this power is through the plant medicine Huachuma. It will sharpen your senses and allow you to recognize this power free flowing throughout your body. At first, it is quite the strange experience as you feel this coursing energy envelop your body. With experience, you will then be able to start to work with the energy. Strong, powerful, lustful, challenging, teaching, rewarding, and connection are some words that come to mind. Connection is the biggie. Through the commonality of this power between all it becomes possible to make connections with nature, others, and yourself through a sub-channel of communication we don’t normally use. Perhaps that is not correct. I think we do use this mode of communication all the time but we don’t know we are engaging in this transmission. It involves harmony and resonance with others. Mental telepathy is a thing; we just don’t have the requisite experience and natural ability to change consciousness enough to recognize it. Plant medicines will show you it is possible and help you cultivate this power. At its core, this power is vibration. All life is vibration and the language of frequency plays out on a scale hidden to us until we unmask its use through changing our consciousness. Changing consciousness allows us to experience the world from a different perspective instead of the frequency we normally lock to that obfuscates much of what is going on behind the scenes. The way we operate in the world is oblivious to this power and the fundamental connection we have to all life, and to zoë.

The ancient Egyptians referenced this power in their art as someone’s double which was the connecting same source life force running through us all that came from the power of the Goddess called sekhem.

Ka power represented as a double

The Hindus call it the subtle body (sukshma sarira) which is the expression of the chakra system and their power centres within. Zoë is the power expressed by the kundalini serpent that rises on up through the chakras. The energy that propels the serpent upwards is zoë. The expression of the power sexually results in bliss and waves of serpent energy coursing throughout the body. It leaves and ever returns, thus the need to recharge. Fully charged, you can eventually express the energy via a different modality. It can still be strong and pulsing sexualized energy but instead of the genital route you can enliven your subtle body and make it shine and pulse. It’s called working with the power and through it you can heal and fully enliven your spiritual centres. This is true enlightenment through tantric practice for anyone who is interested. All of us on the pure and holy path towards enlightenment run from tantra because of its association to sexual power and sex isn’t spiritual; it’s dirty right?

The ancient Minoan god Dionysos is the image of indestructible life. In the myth, zoë is always returning through the auspices of the goddess Ariadne; he mystically impregnates his wife who subsequently becomes his mother.

Dionysos and Ariadne on the Derveni krater from the Thessaloniki Archaeological Museum

The ancient Egyptians called this phenomenon the kamutef which means "bull of his mother."

Ithyphallic Amen-Kamutef from Luxor Temple

Originally in mythology, the ever-coming god was sent away, ridiculed, and torn apart by the Titans but this immortal god always returns. The god is zoë; the one behind all life. Dionysos, once discovered, is the liberator par excellence, freeing one from care, worry, and the self through madness, ecstasy, and potent unmixed wine; the wine being an all-inclusive symbol of intoxication that throws off the chains of self-restraint and cultural expectations. At its best you are free to love all; at its worst you kick down the door of repression and upset the guardians of society.

Dionysos can be described as a he-she. Dionysos is the link between the living and the dead and thus he appears in the Greek Eleusinian Mysteries with Persephone as she descends into the underworld and returns with new life. The awesome power you can feel flowing through you is Dionysos. I will do my best not to pronoun Dionysos as the presence of the god encompasses all. Dionysos is the new life of the grape that appears courtesy of the sun and the rain. Dionysos is a vegetarian and the god also eats raw meat. Dionysos comes forth as a creator, as a vegetarian Dionysos preserves life, and by trapping wild animals in the forest and rending them alive, tearing their flesh and devouring it, the god is also the destroyer. The god is a paradox encompassing life and embracing death. Dionysos dances delightfully upon the thread that binds the living with the deceased. 

Dionysos could just be the god for our tumultuous time. The god is a liberator from the restraints of society and culture, allowing all to embrace their passions and kinks. Transgenderism, free love, freedom from identification, and gender fluidity are all in Dionysos’ retinue. These underground currents within society always return to challenge the status quo and invite cultural revolution or repression. Shall we send the liberator god away once again or this time integrate the perverse into society? A little has to be let in or the dam is going to break. Can’t you see it is happening now? Society is being challenged and walls are coming down. Chaos is rushing in. History informs us of the coming backlash and repression or alternatively the crumbling of a civilization. However beware of the forces that rush in when society collapses as that is never predictable. There’s no escaping this influence and it will always be a part of the fabric of life and our attempts to organize and preserve our way of life. The forces of authoritarianism stand at the ready to take advantage of the Dionysian impulse within all civilizations.

Dionysos is the axis mundi who is the link between the dreamer and the dream. The god is the complete psyche; madness and all. Dionysos is the joker and wild card who upsets the jenga of expectations and conformity and lets it all ride on the outcome of a game of chance. The god resides in the orderly pack of playing cards, shuffling the deck, and inserting wild outcomes of chance within the game of life. Dionysos gets on the roller-coaster of life and turns it up to 11. You think you have it together and then Dionysos comes along to upset the perfectly stacked applecart or to scare the living shit out of you and chase you all the way home. Face it, the potential for self-destruction is such a kick, especially when you are indestructible. What game can I play to give this sensation junkie a thrill? How long can I keep up the game and keep upsetting the pillars of society before I’m asked to leave? Conversely have you ever felt you didn’t fit in, especially when you were a teenager? Didn’t you feel there was something funny about the game adults were playing that you knew was bullshit, so you rebelled? But you grew up and decided to fit in and play that game. The strategies you developed as a kid to fit in you levelled up in order to fit into the adult game. Everything eventually has its reckoning. I want to be free. 

sekhem and huachuma

I received a reminder recently about ancient Egypt and the power of the Goddess, which is contained in their concept of Sekhem. This energy is the ultimate power in the universe that is used to generate and create. We get this definition of the power here from Egyptologist Dr. Ramses Seleem:

The Sekhem is the electromagnetic body, which circulates in and out of the human body, bringing in the five currents of earth energy to nourish the human soul.  This body is responsible for the healing of disease.  The physicians of ancient Egypt, were therefore, called the priests of Sekhemet.

The Illustrated Egyptian Book of the Dead, Dr. Ramses Seleem, page 94.

An aspect of Hathor, the Great Goddess of Egypt, is the raging lioness called Sekhemet that personifies this power. She sustains life and she can take it away, so for instance when the Pharaoh Amenhotep III was in declining health he commissioned hundreds of idols of the Goddess to be crafted in order to try and curry favour with her healing power. It is no accident that the great physician sage of ancient Egypt, Imhotep, claims as his mother Sekhemet. The rattling instrument called the sistrum that is used to call upon the Goddess was also known as Sekhem. The song brought into existence by the shaking of the sistrum creates the energy field which powers each individual soul. We are all notes of the eternal song.

Ihy - the child of Hathor with sistrum

A while back I wrote a blog post where I tracked the ancient Egyptian concept of the Ka power in all of us which is the life force. For most it is a latent and subtle power that animates you and without Ka you’re dead. During times of agitation or excitation you get hits of adrenaline where you notice you are full of energy which is the amplification of this power. Taking notice of this state of agitation allows you to get a better understanding of this power that courses through you and propels you on through life. Basically it gets you up in the morning but there is a limit to how you can experience it and a lot of people like to do death defying things such as skydiving or anything that gives you a rush because you feel that power and it is quite exhilarating. Sekhem is the source of the life force Ka power within us.

What I have noticed about the plant medicine Huachuma is it's a potentiator of the life force power within us as it amplifies pretty much everything. Once you start working with it you notice this effect and the first few times you drink it’s all new so your reaction is: what the fuck is going on? because everything comes alive and you start noticing nature and its wonder and glory; everything is much more vibrant as in actually vibrating and you feel the electrical surge within you. It’s pulsing energy that affects everything from your feelings, thoughts, and senses; right down to your physical form. A lot of the reaction depends upon your state and what you have previously cultivated. The biggest lessons I learned early on in this latest semester at SpiritQuest involved my constant struggles with being in my head, trying to get out of my head, and then into my heart. I’ve done it enough now that I have learned when I struggle with plant medicines it’s because I’m in my head and I’m thinking. Plant medicines take those thoughts and balloon them into crazy territory and fill you with thoughts of doom and gloom plus paranoia. This happens enough that you can start to work with these reactions and soon you realize externally everything is fine but internally you are struggling. Finally with enough lessons and practice you realize that if I am going to be in my head then I’ve made this choice to create hell on earth. You can extrapolate from the teachings your normal sense of day to day life where you are constantly using the mind and you're projecting and judging things; you’re creating the worst case scenario; you’re thinking of scarcity and am I going to survive and how am I going to get through this? You’re creating this hell on earth for yourself and it clearly shows you that in no uncertain terms so you do this enough and eventually you see this is what as a plant teacher Huachuma is going to get through to you. Now that I have drank seventeen times I realized I can remain ignorant for only so long before taking notice that Huachuma is teaching and it is not doing it in a way that is pounding it into to you but it’s just continually showing the student over and over again the choices made and their effects. The choices are realized immediately while you are in it and you can see obviously this is going to affect me in a subtler way when I’m back in my everyday world integrating my experiences. The opposite reaction lines up with the advice of the maestros and maestras who are looking at you telling you to get out of your head and get into your heart as that’s where you ultimately want to be. That’s a choice you make and even if you have trouble making it stick you still will say to yourself okay I will give this a shot because the head case model isn’t working; I’m going to get into my heart and I’m going to express love and see the beauty of everything around me and the beauty that is in other people. I’m going to stop judging them and just accept them for who they are and accept myself for who I am and that is also amplified to the point where you experience bliss and the best day of your life. It’s the best day you have ever experienced because you are in your heart. You are still challenged by your situation but within this unity and this love you feel for everyone, things just don’t matter and you realize that as long as I maintain this love no matter what happens we will always be there for each other and I can always find this piece of heaven by making a choice to live my life this way. There is the opposite reaction where you can choose to come back into the world and live within your head and create a hell for yourself. When you do make this choice you are able to at least be cognizant of it and then stop if you so please, get back into your heart, and start to live with this abundance of love for everything. This power unlocked by the plant medicine is a great teacher.

That’s what Huachuma in its classic teaching does for you but it goes further still. It is a potentiator but I have also noticed that my energy can be juiced after coming forth as masculine energy. I have found that if you can harmonize with another energy field, feminine in my case, then the feminine is what the ancient Egyptians call Sekhem power or the Shakti/Kundalini serpent power of the Hindus. Huachuma potentiates energy and when you harmonize with another's energy field it is a multiplier. The energy I’ve described as serpent power harmonizes with your store of power. The combination then courses through you and personally it goes into my heart and starts my heart fluttering like crazy which is the most ridiculous feeling of so much power that I have ever come across. I’ve only ever been able to do it if there is in the setting this abundance of realized goddess energy within my sphere of influence. I’ve been in Huachuma before when there hasn’t been this energy around and it’s been like a blissful good day but it hasn’t gone the extra step that goes beyond the boundaries of normal experience. The two sacred energies harmonize as one. I can feel it just enveloping me and I know from approaching others and touching them or sharing the energy that they can feel it as well. It leads me back to what I did learn from studying ancient Egyptians and how they discerned this available energy. They were bang on in describing it as this raging energy that comes from the Goddess and when you access it and then are able to become a conduit for it then it is intoxicating. Since I’ve returned home I have missed it so much and am eager to return and just explore the energy. It’s not like a drug where you want to live permanently in that state rather I want to know and understand it better with the eventuality of sharing it with all.

I remember having a taste of this the first time I ever drank Ayahuasca in the form of the coming of the Goddess and I commented afterwards that men who find this Goddess I could easily see spending the rest of their life trying to make the connection again. This energy has appeared for me again as the Goddess in some Ayahuasca ceremonies but not all. It’s a good reason why I stayed on this quest despite hardship; knowing that she might reappear. Huachuma in the proper set and setting is my way in now to consistently channel her energy. 

full circle

At mid life I embarked upon a voyage to find the origins of religious beliefs. I was pretty skeptical of the whole construct of religion in general but I had enough of an open mind to wonder why people have these beliefs and I was curious as to why they formed in humankind in the past. I figured that there must have been an impetus for them and looking back into the prescientific mind of the species would give me an understanding and then I could draw my own conclusions from the inquiry. I was not at all expecting the journey to be as far reaching and life changing as it unfolded, taking me across the globe in search of answers. It shortly became within a burning passion to discover the truth as each specific inquiry opened up more doors and avenues to follow. I discovered the land of the Pharaohs early on it and I followed that path using the intellectual gifts I had been blessed with to try and penetrate what they were getting at with their belief system. With a certain arrogance that serves me well, I became skeptical of the consensus narrative that they were a civilization obsessed with death and I set out to figure out what they were getting at on my own. So I did that and my beliefs are for the most part independent of accepted beliefs. Right or wrong, that’s how it is. I feel this defines my life, animates my contrarian spirit, and I’m richer for it. It is hard to see beyond culture if you are always falling for its narrative.

There are a couple concepts from ancient Egypt that I took a deep dive into and they centre around the Ba and the Ka. The Ba is the eternal essence of what makes you, you. You could vaguely call it the soul and it has a connection to the heart. The ancient Egyptians were fond of word play and the sound used for the Ba backwards was their word for the heart. The Ka, on the other hand, is undeniably the life force as it was represented in hieroglyphs as a bull as well as food offerings. On temple walls you can see the ram headed god Khnum creating duplicate Kas from a master record. The ancient Egyptians believed we were eternal, had a definite self, and experienced many incarnations that were iterations from a master source. This had a pretty profound impact on me and I explored this concept further all the while continuing to search for the origins of these beliefs the ancient Egyptians held with impressive conviction. I deduced that through observation of the cosmos as well as the agricultural cycle the priests could formulate a belief system for the human that would mimic what they observed. Similar cultures and their deities and beliefs could be shown to conform to this idea. The proverbial fly in the ointment was the art and pyramid/coffin texts of the ancient Egyptians. There was nothing orderly about it nor was there any easy way to try and understand what its esotericism was pointing towards. Scholars have placed them within the domain of wishful thinking upon the content of what is in the funerary sphere and afterlife. Eventually my path of seeking would lead to shamanism, experientially entering into the world of shamanism, and discovering an occult world of teachers, spirits, demons, and many challenges that once unlocked would open many more doors, all ready to enter into and discover their hidden secrets.

All the while I kept reading and discovering, all in the name of truth. The philosophical speculations of the Hindi culture I was quite impressed with, especially concerning the idea of no self and that we are all the godhead in a dramatic interpretation of what constitutes reality, as in the million masks of god and the one and the many. I doubled down on the idea of the self being but an illusion and went in search of a way to destroy the ego after first denigrating it. Somebody smart once said a fool who persists in his folly will soon become wise (William Blake). After pursuing this path I abandoned the idea I could fully destroy the self while in this incarnation which then led to a seeking of unity. To fast forward through this journey, I eventually found unity through being separate. I learned that though I viewed myself as separate I was in fact inexorably connected to the all, unable to extricate myself from it. I could have ended my searching here as I had discovered a fundamental unity of all and was shown love is the glue that holds us all together. I’m a knowledge junkie however and so on I went, not satiated with this truth. The problem with continual seeking is coming to the understanding that there are no absolutes. Truth is dependent on circumstance, knowledge, and environment. It seems very easy to take down an argument that is not flexible as I have discovered my truth has no staying power. I had at the time realized we are all one and that the self was transient. The voyage of discovery continued on and I soon realized that the unity I had trumpeted as everything was just the 180 degree opposite of the self I had toppled over. I saw that the fundamental energy of the universe is always on the move and cycles between unity and self. Unity is the seed and the ultimate expression of self is the beautiful flower come forth and this all repeats. That seeking ship of fools continues on in the voyage of discovery, taking a sledgehammer to my beliefs, and not allowing me to rest. A great maestro I know, the venerable don Howard, is fond of saying “there’s always more."

I figured the ship had set a non stop course and assumed it was full steam ahead on a linear path. Finally this weekend I realized the ship’s course is in all likelihood circular because I was reminded of my studies of ancient Egypt and it rang a bell within that allowed my own beliefs to come full circle. With their concept of the Ba I see the eternal soul and the fount of my existence. This heart is common to everything. My own heart beats and connects me to the frequency of the all, which is the rhythmic dance of love. The underlying fount of everything is a universal heart beat tapping out a rhythm of love. With the Ka I see my life force energy that waxes and wanes, a pulse of energy that comes forth again and again as the self, though different guises of that self, and then returns to a fundamental unity, the beating of the heart ensuring I never lose my way. 

lady of terror, lady of life

Continuing on with the topic of the life force which is called Ka in ancient Egypt, Qi in Taoist thinking, Prana in Yogic systems that references the Kundalini power resident in all, and the Nephesh in the Torah, there would be different levels of this power resident in the physical body that would determine your energy. I'm always reminded of a puppy when thinking of something that is full of this power. The ancient Egyptians would represent it iconographically as a bull; a bull being an excellent example of this coursing energy.

They would also represent the power as food material as the ingestion would reinvigorate your levels of this energy. As we age this power within us wanes, we start to lose the ability to fight off sickness and disease, and our material bodies perish. Of course, the ancient Egyptians noticed this and with their ideas of duality constituting creation, and the division into male and female constituent parts, called the activeness of this energy Sekhem. The vitality of the energy, Ka, flows through you. In Greek mythology the closest connection seems to be the beautiful goddess Psyche.

Cupid and Psyche (1798) by François Pascal Simon Gérard

The rattling musical instrument that is sacred to the ancient Egyptian goddess Hathor, called a sistrum, is representative of the Sekhem energy.

Ihy with Sistrum at the temple of Hathor in Denderah

In the Amazonian basin, an indigenous shaman would use a bundle of leaves called a chacapa to control the flow of this vibrational energy during an Ayahuasca ceremony.

A bundle of leaves known as a Chacapa

The double crown of ancient Egypt could be known as the Sekhemty which denotes the power resident in the Pharaoh, who would be the master of Upper and Lower Egypt, which can also symbolize the spiritual and material worlds (the as above, so below concept).

Horus at Edfu wearing Sekhemty

One of the titles of Osiris, who is representing the soul coming to incarnate in matter and being left for dead, is "Great Sekhem" and this concept is reinforcing that the ultimate expression of power and greatness is resident in the soul and it is through the power provided by Sekhem that this is realized.

The god Osiris is frequently given the epithet "Great Sekhem" or "Foremost of Powers," and the sekhem is therefore commonly found as an emblem and a fetish in connection with the underworld deity.
Reading Egyptian Art, Richard H. Wilkinson, page 183.

As well, the Sekhem sceptre was held by persons making offerings at tombs and waved over the offerings to activate the Ka power which would re-animate the deceased in the next life.

Seti I at Abydos with Sekhem sceptre

In the art of the ancient Egyptians, the face of divinity was for the most part never displayed straight on, always in profile, except in the case of Hathor and of the goddess Sekhemet. This is because the face of the god contained frightful amounts of this great power. The energy of the sistrum was derived from the face of Hathor.

For, as the Egyptians never tired of reiterating, direct contact with the face of powerful beings is dangerous, and again and again we read in prayers to a deity, 'May your merciful face be towards me'. In the face resides the kind of power called sekhem, which is also one of the names of the sistrum and is obviously linked with the name of Sekhmet 'the Powerful One'.
Hathor Rising, The Power of the Goddess in Ancient Egypt, Alison Roberts, page 57.

Sekhemet, the powerful one, is an aspect of the great goddess Hathor. (The Greek goddess Psyche, instead of being an aspect of Aphrodite, the Greek counterpart of Hathor, is mythologized as a rival to the beauty of Aphrodite.)

Sekhemet

Agitated water in a boiling state always brings to my mind the raging goddess Sekhemet. Her name is derived from the Sekhem which is essentially what you need to know about her power.

Sekhemet in hieroglyphics

Being full of this power, she is represented as a lioness; a raging source of animalistic energy who can create and also destroy. She rages; she brings pestilence and disease; and she can restore health to the sick. The great Pharaoh of the 18th dynasty, Amenhotep III, in his later years in seriously declining health, commissioned hundreds of statues of Sekhemet on the temple grounds, known as Isheru, in the form of the goddess Mut at Karnak in order to gain favour with Sekhemet so that she would restore health and vitality back upon him. She is a reminder that the difference between medicine and poison is all in the dosage and a clue that the healing action of medicine is essentially targeted energy that directly affects the compromised life form. Sekhemet is the patron goddess of physicians and the priesthood dedicated to her were all accomplished doctors in their own right, thus the epithet of Sekhemet the "lady of terror" could become the "lady of life". When seated in a statue portrayal, Sekhemet is shown holding the ankh; the symbolism being she grants life by activating the Ka power inherent within all life forms and thus animating creation. This would apply cosmologically on a grand scale or the power resident within you and I.

Sekhemet sitting at the Louvre

Sekhemet as the "lady of terror" can be compared favourably to the Hindu goddess Kali. Kali comes from the Sanskrit conception of time which is kala and the connection is that time leads to death which in the material plane is inescapable. If you are ignorant of your divine origins then the idea of death and dissolution is indeed terrifying. A cursory look at Hindu mythology demonstrates parallels with the idea of the Sekhem powering the Ka that I have been expounding upon in this entry. Shiva, who does the dance to propel creation along and at the same time is causing its destruction, is said to be powered by his wife Parvati of whom Kali is an aspect. This image shows the superior power of Kali over that of Shiva which parallels the idea that Ka power is nothing without the Sekhem.

Kali dominating Shiva

When depicted standing, Sekhemet holds a papyrus scepter, a symbol of Lower Egypt, which represents the flourishing and verdant created material world as opposed to the symbolic spiritual realm that Upper Egypt can represent.

Sekhemet standing with Papyrus sceptre

The sun disc on her head is symbolic of her presence in the realm of time known as neheh to the ancient Egyptians. It is representative of the cyclical nature of the time paradigm which us creatures of the created world are subject to and these cycles of birth and death, and of creation and destruction, are universal principles known to the ancient Egyptians as Maat. Tellingly, another epithet of Sekhemet is "The One Who Loves Maat and Who Detests Evil." Statues of Sekhemet are found scattered throughout the ruins of ancient Egypt and the base materials used are traditionally igneous rocks such as basalt or granite; the volcanic rocks being a great symbol of the explosive and fiery nature of the essence of Sekhemet. In the 18th dynasty, upon the rise of the god Amun-Re to prominence at Thebes, the mother goddess wife of his, Mut, took on many of the aspects of Sekhemet. Amun-Re is the universal hidden light that illuminates creation and Mut is the great mother as Sekhemet who is the complementary aspect of this principle and powers that manifest in our world. Within all of us is this light that comes from the source and on a cosmic scale the light operates as the source of spiritual life and love. Their son Khonsu is the mummified child who has the latent power of a healer which is present within all of humanity.

Khonsu 

Taking this idea further, the celestial representation of these powers are Sekhemet and her husband Ptah; Ptah being an amalgamation of the sky and earth separated by the Heh gods. Ptah is the Greek Hephaestus, who is the great craftsman of the material world.

Seti I worshipping Ptah at Abydos

He does not create unless the raging power of Sekhemet is active within him just like Amun-Re does not bestow his light upon the world without the active feminine principle represented by Mut. The child of Ptah and Sekhemet is the beautiful child Nefertem; the Atum child who is the androgyne, the origin of all whose division enabled the ennead of Iunu (Heliopolis) to come into existence and form the material world we know and allowed the soul as Osiris to manifest into creation.

Nefertem

Sekhmet. Most distinguished of the lioness goddesses and consort of Ptah (or Ptah-Sokar) of Memphis, mother of Nefertem. An early reference in the Pyramid Texts credits her with conceiving the king of Egypt (who was often portrayed as a lion), and she is portrayed in the Fourth Dynasty as passing the life force to King Snefru.
The Great Goddesses of Egypt, Barbara S. Lesko, page 273.

The great Imhotep of ancient Egypt, the one who comes in peace, claims his heritage from the great powers of Ptah and Sekhemet. Imhotep was a teacher, sage, healer, craftsman/builder, and magician of the 3rd dynasty of such renown that he was elevated to a status of a demigod in successive generations in ancient Egypt.

Imhotep

The Greeks represented their patron of healing, Asclepius, as being synonymous with Imhotep. The iconic staff, emblematic of healing that us moderns have borrowed from the Greeks, is entwined with the serpent; serpent power representing the power to heal (and harm). Imhotep is the true historical pioneer healer who should be given his proper due and ultimately his power to heal comes from the great goddess Sekhemet.

The greek god of healing Asclepius with serpent entwined staff

The oppressive and destructive heat of the Egyptian mid-day sun was also thought to come from the powers of Sekhemet which further solidified her terrifying aspect. In this aspect, she was known as "Nesert" which means the flame. The "Lady of Pestilence" was also greatly feared because of the sickness she could unleash without warning upon the population. Another of her epithets was the "Red Lady", this moniker symbolizing her association with Lower Egypt and the desert fringes of civilization.

The long dress worn by the goddess is often coloured red, and one of Sekhmet's epithets was 'mistress of red linen' symbolizing either her Lower Egypt or her warlike nature. Sometimes her garment has a rosette pattern over each nipple and while this has been suggested to reflect patterns in the shoulder hair of lions it is perhaps more likely that the pattern reflects an astronomical symbolism of the 'shoulder star' of the constellation Leo which is marked in Egyptian astronomical paintings. 
The Complete Gods and Goddesses of Ancient Egypt, Richard H. Wilkinson, page 182.

This connection of the rosette pattern to the constellation of Leo is an enigmatic one. Perhaps it can lend some weight to the age old debate of the origin of the great Sphinx on the Gizah plateau and who it ultimately represents. The feline characteristics and plateau connections to Hathor do tantalizing suggest the Sphinx is Hathor in her guise as the lioness Sekhemet.

Great Sphinx on the Gizah plateau

Sphinxes were symbols of three great goddesses of the Mediterranean: Hathor, Astarte, and Isis. Hathor votaries declared her to be "the mother of the gods, and the creators of the heavens and the earth, and of everything which is in them." She assumed the powers of "every solar god." When Ra, the sun god, was displeased with humans he asked Hathor to slay them all. She did. In the Hathor style the hair divides into two equal curls falling below the shoulders onto the breast. The Hathor style is traceable to the Middle Kingdom of Egypt (about 2500 BC) and Sphinxes that wear their hair like Hathor are found in Crete, Hittite Anatolia, and Syria.
Book of the Sphinx, Willis Goth Regier, page 168.

Hathor's presence and worship at Gizah is well documented:

The southern side of the valley temple of Khafre (Chephren) at Giza is known to have been dedicated to Hathor, and the title 'priestess of Hathor' becomes common from the 4th dynasty on.
The Complete Gods and Goddesses of Ancient Egypt, Richard H. Wilkinson, page144.

The valley temple of Khafre at Giza records on its facade the names of only two goddesses: Hathor, representing southern Egypt, and Bastet, representing the north.
The Complete Gods and Goddesses of Ancient Egypt, Richard H. Wilkinson, page 178.

The ancient Egyptian name for the Sphinx on the Gizah plateau is Per-Hol which means the place of Horus. The ancient Egyptian name for Hathor is Hwt-Her which means the "House of Horus." Taking this idea even further, the Sphinx was known in the New Kingdom and onwards as Horemakhet which has been translated as "Horus in the horizon." But would you now be surprised if I told you that akhet is another name for Hathor as the dawn? This means the designation Horemakhet is describing Horus as the light appearing in the dawn, which is Hathor as the akhet, essentially the light emanating from the house provided by the Goddess. As well, the Sphinx forms the rising sun in the east between the pyramids of Khafre and Khufu:

Approached from the east-southeast, the Sphinx’s head appears on the horizon between the Khafre and Khufu pyramids, like the sun disk between two mountains in the hieroglyph “akhet” or horizon. 
http://www.aeraweb.org/sphinx-project/national-park/

Akhet in hieroglyphics

Once again, the idea is symbolizing the light rising from the mother goddess Hathor who is being represented as the Sphinx. The lion was regarded as the guardian of the eastern and western horizon and in the above hieroglyph for the akhet, lions could be substituted for the mountains. The Gizah plateau in theory should have two guardian sphinxes at the eastern and western gateways for the sun's entrance into and out of the underworld.

Two felines representing mountains

It cannot be overstated how important was the power of this Goddess to the ancient Egyptians. Horus is representing the Ba in ancient Egypt, the born again soul to us, which is the actualization or coming forth of the light that is inherent in all of us engendered symbolically from the remembering of the slain Osiris and subsequent impregnation of his sister-wife Isis. 

The Egyptian tree goddess (whether identified as Hathor or another goddess) is often shown dispensing water to the birdlike bas (souls) of deceased persons in later papyrus and tomb paintings. Interestingly, near the Giza plateau there still survived in the 1950s a deep and very ancient well in the midst of a grove of sycamores.
The Great Goddesses of Egypt, Barbara S. Lesko, page 84.

There is a myth about Sekhemet being sent to destroy humankind and ultimately pacified as alluded to above. Perhaps the Sphinx is a magical amulet at Gizah on a grander scale designed to keep her in a calm state! This aspect of terror continues today as in Arabic the Great Sphinx is known as Abu al-Hul, “the father of terror.” Sekhemet is associated with the "Eye of Re" that in one myth was sent to destroy humankind because they were not following the laws of Re and thus she was to reintroduce justice in the form of Maat. As an aside, you can see a parallel here with the flood stories of antiquity which concern the rebelliousness of man and the desire of the god(s) to punish them. The feminine principle is connected to water and thus a great flood comes to destroy them. Anyway, Sekhemet was sent to earth in the form of a lioness and the carnage began, soon threatening to destroy all of humankind. There was no stopping Sekhemet in her rage at this point. A solution was found by pouring 7,000 jugs of beer mixed with red pomegranate juice into the Nile, which now resembled blood. Sekhemet eagerly drank of this blood and became so drunk the eventual hangover lasted for three days. She awoke in a pacified state and humankind was spared. A feast day was established in which everyone drank beer stained with pomegranate juice in reverence to "the Mistress and lady of the tomb, gracious one, destroyer of rebellion, mighty one of enchantments."

From a personal standpoint I can see a connection with the terror of Sekhemet juxtaposed with her healing aspect in conjunction with psychedelic plant medicines such as Ayahuasca. The Ayahuasca journey at its core reveals the interplay of the masculine and feminine energies to the drinker, which to the non-initiated can be overwhelming and absolutely terrifying, but within this experience is this incredible ability to heal.

As I have shown, it was the Goddess in ancient Egypt who ultimately controlled the power within creation to not only give vitality to the life force that flows through all living things but she also powered the creation of the physical world. As Sekhemet, she healed and she destroyed. In addition, the Goddess' ultimate act was to enable the light within us all, known as Horus, to come forth. It is the destiny of all of humankind to realize our divine nature and to this we owe a debt of gratitude that can never be repaid to the unselfishness and love of the great Goddess.