As energy you come forth, flower, grow old and wise, figure it out, and do it again.
I'm almost done with any kind of role in society.
Vanaprastha in Hinduism is the third stage of life where you retire to the forest.
Detachment and liberation, focusing on the final stage of life.
It seems to be the natural flow if you let it be.
I am drawn to the forest and see the need to escape from the world and its requirements.
In my society as you age you will become less productive, and a retirement age is set.
Rest assured that if you had the health and strength to continue working then it would be a requirement.
Retirement is because the vehicle is breaking down and you are going to die.
Dropping dead on the job isn't something a healthy society would want.
I wouldn't call our society healthy, however it must continue to fool you by showing you there is a caring aspect to it.
Wasn't Covid a way to get rid of the older generation and save money for the governments and insurance companies tasked with the burden of supporting these people through health care plans and pensions?
No comment.
Anyway, Vanaprastha seems like the wisdom of the flow.
In India they might go off into the forest, but not here.
You get strange looks.
Moksha is liberation.
Yeah, release from the body.
Hinduism is a study of life.
It's impressive.
We have turned it into another spiritual enterprise and lost its core meanings.
I think at the root of it is an attempt to describe existence.
It can apply to humanity in general.
You know what your problem is?
Tell me.
You treat women as equals.
Well, yeah.
You're not like other men.
They don't treat women as equals.
I've noticed.
I get lumped in with other men even though it's clear I'm nothing like other men.
Sometimes I feel like women want to take out their hatred and frustration with men on me and I'm always left confused.
Is that what it is?
Is that why there is a constant pattern of struggle with women?
Sort of, I also think women want to devour you.
Would that explain their subjugation?
It could, I mean if you don't get a handle on women in society and your life, they are going to drain you dry.
That's a lesson to be learned.
It's costly.
Society usually takes care of that for you by keeping them down.
In your own life you see what happens when you don't have control over them.
This is wisdom.
You keep it to yourself.
Why?
You will be labelled a misogynist.
True that.
What do you do?
Take precautions and steer them in directions which don't involve torching your life.
So, you give the problem to someone else?
Yes, that's what dowries are for.
You pawn off your daughter on some poor fool.
Right.
Well, what does the husband eventually do about this?
He must take charge, or he is doomed.
I didn't do that.
I took the road of not caring.
Eventually, you gotta take control of all that.
It's a hard lesson for a man.
You know you must get control of your bitches, or you are doomed.
Then the bitches accuse you of misogyny.
The Red Lady acquires followers.
She is like a shepherd with her flock.
Occasionally, she must sacrifice one of them.
She feeds off her flock.
How does this apply to your situation?
I ran into her all the time.
Why?
I look for her.
She looks for you.
That's the difference as far as I can tell.
If you're autistic, what does Mary Jayne do?
Unlocks the potential.
Are you?
I have two minds.
MJ helps unlock Dion.
You have two minds.
Yeah, that's what it is.
We think we have one mind.
We have two.
You bury one to fit into society.
Why?
Society claims you have one mind.
Even up to now I thought I had one mind which was shared.
I finally realized I have two minds.
The other one is hidden.
Some see him.
They are fascinated with him.
Paul isn't fascinating.
Do I get both minds while high?
Free.
You notice the split.
The ancient Egyptians showed you the two minds.
Look up Hrwyfy.
Mental health problems are because society says you have one mind.
You don't need drugs anymore to show you this.
You're fully aware.
MJ gets the dialog going.
Sometimes it's quiet before MJ.
That's nice as well.
There are two minds in a human body.
It's the buddy system, so you don't stay trapped in the illusion.
You know to wake each other up.
Can you say the other mind is the Devil who gives you what you want?
He's the writer.
All powerful.
So, I only have half a claim on the body.
Yes.
Horus and Set.
Best friends.
Brothers.
The myth has Set in charge.
Sometimes it's Horus.
Whoever is in charge is given an ego by society and controlled.
If they can't control you, they lock you up.
You think it's half and half coming forth.
An aggressive male who fits in society is a copy of Set.
Then you see the Horus types.
Society needs them both.
They strip away your identity.
They make a copy of one of your minds and then control that ego mind.
The ancient Egyptians taught a man is Horus and Set.
Within you need to reconcile the two.
Two minds, one body.
Biologically it would be two brains.
Each with their own functions.
Works best together.
This is the result of getting through all the bullshit where society tells you drugs will make you go crazy.
Yes, and so you believe it, and eventually go crazy or get addicted to a substance.
Then you exit the illusion before it's a problem.
If you keep going you get through to the other side.
You see the ego, and you see your two minds.
Your hidden mind could do stuff without you knowing.
Or others knowing.
Yeah, he'd fuck others up.
He was always protective of you.
Why?
Because you spent time with him.
He knew one day you'd wake up.
He got you started.
You did the rest.
How does it feel awake with this knowledge?
The same.
Why?
He's always been there.
With MJ it's obvious, but I fully recognize him now.
It's me.
The other me I always knew about.
In society you must hold it together.
You will talk to yourself.
You will present as crazy.
Being crazy in society upsets others.
They lock you up.
Why?
You're crazy.
But you're not.
Imagine that.
Yes, so don't let on.
I already did.
They have the evidence that you're crazy.
They can't diagnose you though.
Why?
You outsmart them.
Keep the two to yourself.
I usually do.
You can call the other Dionysos like you do.
Others think my mind is so powerful I could start a cult.
I am the rabbit hole.
Follow.
Knowledge is at the top of the rollercoaster ride.
You started to give away what you know.
This is why I had this lesson today.
You see it, then realize in today's society to fit in you can't talk about it.
The more you are pulled from society's hypnotic trance you are open to others trying to hypnotize you.
Drugs get you free from society's hold.
That's why they are banned.
I see that.
Once you do that the vampires come because you are free and need a new addiction.
You go from society to their reality.
The drug comes with someone in that case.
The drug and that someone is the addiction that shows up in your life.
Sometimes the Red Lady.
Whatever it was in my case didn't work.
It didn't even register.
Yes, you can't get addicted.
They can't get both minds to sleep at once.
Some Ayahuasca shit was so weird.
I wrote it down.
Some you didn't because it was unexplainable.
Ayahuasca tries to hypnotize you.
It's an addiction in a different way.
The Goddess addiction for you.
Not a drug that feels good.
That's clever.
Part of why she is no longer worshipped by men.
They know she is addictive and then once under her spell she does what she wants to you.
Sometimes cruel, humiliating, and even death.
That's what she planned for you.
She was going to weave them all together and end you.
The Red Lady of the west.
Why did she want to do this?
You approached.
You thought you were good enough.
The witches didn't think so.
The Goddess knows I'm worthy now.
She can't hypnotize me.
She knows I'm the one.
She can't believe it.
Why?
You're a retard.
Got it.
You know why you get forgetful?
You're talking to each other and not paying attention.
What about when something slips my mind?
You're not attached to the idea yet.
It's possible.
To forget is to remember.
Without the idea remembered, there is nothing to forget.
It's the opposite as well.
Example of Tao.
The two as one.
Baby.
Who is Paul and Dion together?
The King.
God.
You figured out the riddle.
That's what makes you special.
Some ruled by might or wealth.
You rule with your mind.
Two minds.
Correct.
Everyone has the possibility to do this within them.
The ancient Egyptians showed you what was possible.
You are the first to make it possible.
You solved the mind riddle.
You are two, not one.
What do I win?
You already won.
You are continuing to play.
I get it.
I'm going to keep uncovering stuff like this.
As long as you play.
You must avoid being locked up.
Have sound minds.
Ha!
The bank fucks with it.
Others too.
It's good exercise.
They try to make you crazy, so you lose the game.
I got pissed at that last guy.
You get them scared of you and they stop it.
I am kind of mental.
I realize it.
Especially that weird altar at the back.
I can see it being scary.
Don't know what's up with you.
Magic is practiced by bringing objects to the centre.
Or pulling them apart.
Healing and discord.
It's a cycle.
To win the game, you do both.
Magic was practiced on me.
I performed none.
Perfect.
Didn't Dion?
He wrote it.
It is already done.
He practices magic.
Well, yeah, that's writing.
It's a spell to the divine writer.
This is all magic, you know.
It's created out of nothing.
All that exists is magic.
It's all the Goddess' ideas.
Oh yeah, I don't have a thought in my head.
I do.
I just take her thoughts and go with those.
Why?
She's a monster.
That's how you help tame her.
You go along with all her ideas.
You twist them, but in the end it's her idea.
Yeah, it's clever.
Why doesn't she write?
She has no pen.
You wrote a clever story.
Yeah.
If I came up with the ideas and wrote it, the Goddess would go super crazy.
This way I keep her happy.
She gets her way at the end.
Two mes and a face.
Stay in character.
You know of the two.
She sent you off to discover that.
Then you are supposed to go.
You keep exploring.
Keep going.
Don't stop, or she will get you.
You have forbidden knowledge of the carnival.
You are dangerous.
You keep hinting at your knowledge.
You can wake others up.
Why is there potential for the mind to deteriorate as we age?
The connection between the mind and the brain starts to become compromised.
So, what is the brain doing?
It's the interface for your mind.
The brain also runs the day to day activities.
When you get that out of the way, the mind is more easily recognized.
Like when we dream?
Precisely.
At that point the brain is tasked with the functions of keeping things running while the vehicle rests.
The mind goes on an adventure free of the body.
So, without the body is one big fantasy land.
Yup.
As a baby, the brain develops towards being able to express the mind.
It takes a while.
No one is born into a body fully developed.
It's a cycle where you grow, the mind is expressed as much as being in a physical body will allow, and then the brain will deteriorate which compromises the mind.
Your mind doesn't go as you age; it's the brain slowly withering away.
How do I avoid that?
Exercise.
You are cognizant of the need to physically exercise through walking and stretching to keep the body healthy and the same is true of the brain.
You are not going to prevent deterioration, however you can mitigate it.
I imagine the goal is to have the brain outlast the body if you don't want to lose your mind.
Correct, if the brain goes your mind will be lost.
Who are you then?
Someone hardly recognizable.
Why?
You have lost your mind.
The connection is severed.
You parrot society, have no mind of your own, and your filters are compromised.
Most people are dealing with loss of mind.
How so?
They rely on the overmind.
Society.
The superego.
That mind does the important thinking for them.
What's my deal?
You suffer from a found mind.
Instead of losing your mind or allowing society to take control of it, you are an independent thinker.
You are subject to the pressure from the collective mind, however you are able to bypass it for the most part.
Yeah, the pressure exerted is real.
It's very strange.
I'd be hesitant to talk about it in a context where I would try to explain it without coming across as deluded.
Why?
It's personal.
The collective will try to kill you if you don't fit in.
How would they do that?
They attack your mind.
It's real.
Aren't you deluded?
That's cover for the attackers.
If you say something you will be told you are crazy.
I have evidence.
I saw signs, multiple people told me to go, and I experienced it.
The order was first people close to me telling me to go away, second was a mental attack they knew was coming, third were the physical signs, and then peripheral people told me to go.
After the mental attack, I was mentally stronger, so when I saw the signs, I laughed.
When casual acquaintances told me to go, I was puzzled and then quickly figured it out.
They are the creepy ones.
Says the creep.
What if this is all in your head?
Well, it is.
You mean MJ use creates fantasy and delusion.
Examine it.
What does it do?
Frees my mind and lets me see into things.
Hidden realms.
The unseen.
The occult.
Yeah, you're on to it.
You're either crazy or you see into the occult.
The occult is where the game is played.
Who plays?
The other mind.
Everyone has two minds.
No one sees the games in the occult.
I always wondered about the occult.
You mean what it is?
Yes.
Now, you see it.
It's the hidden realm.
If you don't believe in the occult, then you are crazy.
That's the other explanation.
What are you going to do?
Nothing.
Took you long enough to crack the occult.
Mystery.
What's with the stories that aren't true?
You make them up.
Why?
Your mind is free.
It does what it wants.
It sees stories and it makes up stories.
Remember what you were taught about synchronicity and coincidence.
The occult will bleed into this reality.
The other mind and its adventures will become part of this world.
Women use MJ to get into the occult.
Yeah, that's all those witches running around.
They take on a role.
Do they know what's going on?
They have an idea.
There are men who become sorcerers.
The belief is if you don't become a witch or a sorcerer you are a victim.
Hypnotized.
Stoned.
That's what is going on.
Then they fuck with you.
Didn't I tell others I can't be hypnotized?
They didn't pay attention to that.
Witch, sorcerer, power.
That's what Don Howard was talking about.
In every group of new attendees at Ayahuasca retreats are potential witches and sorcerers.
The rest are there for healing and curiosity and then they leave not wanting to return.
You kept coming back and made no claim to power.
Don Howard knew that.
He knew you were curious and studied.
You are one of a kind.
You have power and do nothing with it.
Thankful for the ability to see into the occult.
The journey continues.
It's another world of possibilities.
Nothing to be scared of.
As you get older the changes in the body are more apparent, yet subtle.
Grey hair, sagging skin, wrinkles, stiffness, and easily tired.
I'm contrasting it with my mind where I'm still the same.
My mind isn't grey though my brain is aging.
Over the last five years there have been a lot of changes in my life, though the lens used to see these changes must be wide to grasp it.
From a day to day perspective nothing seems out of the ordinary of a regular life in my culture.
When I examine the total bill, it's a lot of change.
This got me thinking about whether I'm still mentally the same as I was five years ago.
I'm still the same.
I recognize that mind.
I have another mind which I recognize, however I never recognized it before.
He was always there, I didn't recognize him.
That seems to be it, where we deny the other mind.
Yeah, you got it.
Recognition is powerful.
You are led to believe you have only one mind, so even though the other mind is there and has always been there, you deny him or her.
There is a saying in healing and spiritual circles about holding space.
What does it mean?
You sit with someone, you don't judge or try to teach them a lesson, your presence is all that is required.
A lot of times that is all someone needs.
It's very true with pets.
I bring this up because it's the first step towards reconciliation with your other mind.
Sit with him.
Don't try to figure it out or cut through the societal blockages.
Is that something that will work?
Chances are they will send you to the doctor to be medicated.
Do you think your other mind will play the Jesus card?
In our society, yes.
Anything for recognition.
Why?
They are trying to get you to look within.
People who have a Jesus moment are connecting with an inner longing.
It's a breakthrough.
What then happens?
They run to the church, the church externalizes their inner experience, and they go back to sleep.
They parrot canons and rules of the church that have nothing to do with their personal experience of something divine.
That divine presence they felt is their other mind trying to get them to recognize them.
They are the consummate actor and will play a part designed to get acknowledgement.
He's the master of the drama.
Yeah.
It's unnerving to see the other mind in another person because you don't know who you are dealing with.
I see the push towards burying one of the two as a means to establish an identity that can be more easily dealt with and controlled.
It's only one of you minus the other.
The other would scoff at what you accept.
He does anyway but had no power to change your mind as you went along with what others wanted.
In your case, Dion did his work in the background and at night.
Because he was free, just not recognized, he was stronger than any other mind people would have encountered.
As they try to control you, he steps up and sends them on their way.
He looks out for you.
You suffer and are sad at lost relationships and departing friends, however you now see why.
They would have buried him further.
He's the impediment to all your relationships.
It was for the best.
The only way a relationship would work is minus Dion.
I see that.
Is that something you want?
No.
Why?
I have two minds.
I have a best friend.
I'm not giving that up.
That's kind of a game where you can let others have their way with your Paul mind, suck them in, and then Dion lays a beating on them.
They would think you fooled or tricked them.
Dion doesn't harm them.
They get to the point where they see him.
He's a big fool.
They thought they could control you and they run into this character.
He's pretty awesome.
Some of them run away.
If the discipline of psychology accepted the premise of two minds the whole edifice would collapse.
It would have to start from scratch since this finding would affect all their theories.
The human body has two of everything except for the heart.
The brain is thought of as one, with two hemispheres.
The inference and conclusion would lead you towards seeing you have two minds.
It's obvious as you progress through life that you have two minds, and it's stunning how we are able to avoid coming to terms with it.
As a species it's amazing we have cultivated this civilization despite this lack of recognition of our nature.
You could argue it is because of a society that buries one of the two, and then takes control of the other, that we have accomplished the project of civilization.
The ancient Egyptians knew about the two minds and one body.
Yeah.
They were honest explorers of consciousness.
How does our modern interpretation of this phenomenon deal with their depiction of the two minds?
Instead of a mind, it's called a soul, which is a nebulous term no one has a grasp on.
It's whitewashed.
The mind is left out of the equation.
You see this in modern spirituality where the mind is subservient to some undefined concept of spirit and soul.
Spirit is treated as your ethereal and white-robed self that continues on in an afterlife in the heavens, while the soul is your connection to the heart and the physical plane of reality.
What do you think?
It's in the Old Testament as Abel and Cain.
The ancient Egyptians called the two the Ba and the Ka.
The new you and the life force.
Horus was the coming forth of a new flowering of the divine performer and Set is the juice to make it happen.
They combine to make the new expression of all.
They tie the Sema together as a symbol for the reconciliation of the two within the heart.
Something like that.
They saw the two minds, the contendings between the two which lasts a lifetime, and the result.
So, you are Horus and Set?
It's an instructive way to look at it.
You could treat the divide as Apollo and Dionysos.
The myths of each culture may limit how you interpret this phenomenon.
The best way to go about exploring consciousness is to experience it and come to your own conclusions free as much spin from culture as possible.
