The dream I had a week ago Saturday night will leave me food for thought for quite a while as it was a full plate. During the day, the weather and sunshine contributed to the first spring like day of the year and I spent a great deal of time outside, all the while smoking away on Mapacho. For those unfamiliar with the tobacco maestro, he is a potentiator of dreams, always reminding me that Ayahuasca visions and dreams are of the same world.
Monday, March 29, 2021
Monday, March 22, 2021
It’s all an act. I’m such a good actor I don’t even recognize I am acting so how would I comprehend the masterful dramatic performance of the ultimate actor? I’ve seen the master teacher and marvelled at how he transcends time. How he multiplies coincidences to the point of absurdity. How he wakes me from dreams at his whim to give me food for thought. How he laughs as I curse him and tell him I’m going to destroy him. He then whispers in my ear as I wake, “I’m going to kill you.” He continuously challenges me and watches me fall down. He speaks to me with the voice of a madman, contributing to my psychosis. As with the Goddess, he never has given up on me, though his curriculum is deadly.
Monday, March 15, 2021
He rubbed my nose in it. We used to do this to puppies when house training them. If they took a dump in the house we’d put their nose in the shit in order that they learn not to crap anymore on the carpet. I bring up this turn of phrase because it is in essence what my shadow did to me. I was weak when I first met him and I was so scared of his presence I ran away like a coward. Subsequently, when he told me truths about the world I recoiled from what he was telling me or I just flat out rejected the assertions. He was my adversary and I thought he was deceitful so I discarded what he said. The behaviour was reflexive on my part because he was so frightening and I just didn’t want to hear him out. Now I know better and am all ears.
Monday, March 8, 2021
To be birthed by the Goddess gives rise to the ability to become greater than the gods. The child coming forth from her contains both the masculine life force and the feminine life form. Into consciousness we are birthed with the potential to harmonize both powers. Instead of harbingers of either power, we can combine them into a harmonious whole and realize the appearance of the indestructible life force into the conscious world of forms, eventually discarding the body and becoming a perfected being following the example of the caterpillar’s metamorphosis into a butterfly. Her powers of intoxication must be the key to discovering and achieving this synthesis. Through rhythm and dance, the song of our lives beats outs the time signature that implores us to become whole and make our mother proud. I rise from darkness, a miracle.
Monday, March 1, 2021
It was 2017 when I turned 50 that I completed the holy climb up the mountain and discovered love is the answer. It was the fifth year of my involvement with plant medicines and I knew after that trip that I didn’t have to search anymore. I could be content with what I had discovered. I saw the unity within us all and that the elixir to make us come together is love. There was no certificate handed out denoting my enlightenment however I was aware I had the answer. At any rate, the caretakers and bestower of enlightenment frown upon the shortcut of drug use to obtain the status. It’s best to sit in meditation for a quarter century, pay obeisance to the guru, sweep up at the ashram, and hope the grace of wisdom and understanding descends upon you. See, even after all I have been through I maintain my wit and sarcasm.