shut the fuck up

It's best to shut up.

Why?

Because if you don't, you will start sounding like all the other nutters.

You know, the ones you encounter on the internet and dismiss as loons.

The thing is I know all the stuff they are talking about.

What do you think about it?

They are stories.

If you believe them, they will start to come alive in your world.

So, you don't believe them anymore?

No.

Like the one about the demiurge for instance.

There's some truth to it in that humanity is being fooled into worshipping a false creator.

What's your take on it?

It's a game.

Get to God.

Become God and play the part.

The demiurge is the guy who got to the top of the mountain and became the most high.

If you get close to him, you will see he is at the top of the game.

Is he God?

In the game he is.

The king of the castle.

You see people alter their consciousness and start to see little bits of the mystery.

Then they start talking before they understand it.

What makes you special?

I shut up about it except for posting stuff on my blog site.

No one reads it, so it's more like a purge to clear out room for more capacity to make up stories.

So, they are made up?

Sort of.

If you believe them and have conviction they start to seep into this reality.

It's easy to alter your consciousness and start talking about your delusions, especially if you are good at speaking.

You can attract followers that way.

I'm telling you to shut the fuck up.

Do you believe your delusions?

Yes.

Why?

They seem real.

Well, real to me.

Dion seems real.

He is real to others.

I think that's the bridge.

It's what we are looking for.

We want someone else to confirm it.

Not to agree with us, but to witness it.

I have had a bunch of people witness him or something strange about me.

I also have my own inner knowing which without an external validator can become a delusion.

Of course, because it is only you who has access.

What about people who read your blog posts?

They think I'm crazy for the most part.

I also think that they feel there is something to me.

I'm crazy, but I have some kind of mystery about me and I know things.

That's fair.

What are you going to do?

Nothing.

I'm not going to talk about it even though it is tempting.

Why not?

It's not worth it.

I'll keep it to myself and play along.

Victim.
That's a good card to play in both personal relationships and politics.
What the gameplayer does is they strike first or cause some kind of damage to the mark.
The mark returns fire and the perpetrator claims victim status.
They muddy the waters enough so that the resulting confusion allows them to claim victimhood status by being the first to declare it.
They reinforce their claim by labelling their original target with accusations that are hard to respond to as subsequent denial of their claims will be met with the gaslighting gambit.
It is an advanced level carnival game.
How do you beat that game?
The only way is to do nothing.
The game is set up so that anything you do will cause a loss.
The operator of the booth designed it as a foolproof method to always win.
As with everything, nothing is completely foolproof and as you have noticed within the carnival the games require your participation.
They don't factor in your participation as doing nothing.
It is a loophole where you are participating by doing nothing.
The carnival trick cannot work without you doing something.
What happens when you do nothing?
The victim becomes frustrated.
Why?
They want victory.
Instead, the game is unfinished.
It can never end if you do nothing.
The outcome depends on you doing something.
The whole enterprise is set up so you do something and lose the game.
Fuck, I have a lot of these on the go.
Yeah, you are the King of do nothing.
My life is unresolved.
Keep it that way if you want to stay in the game.
Why?
Because if not, it's game over.
You played the high-risk games.
I do have a tolerance for those kinds of games.
The physical manifestation of that is plant medicines in the Amazon jungle.
Yeah, that's pretty crazy.
You are aggressive with your retirement planning and investments.
Yeah, I don't have the worry gene.
You think that's it?
I don't know, I don't have it, but what I see are other people who are full of worry.
It keeps them up at night and gives them ulcers.
Why don't you have it?
I learned not to care.
Then I saw through the game which allowed me to see life has no meaning.
I do nothing, don't care, and don't attach existential meaning to life.
I'm an unserious person.
I found happiness.

Here is the worry loop defined.

You give someone information.

They start to worry.

They do research and amplify the worry through possible consequences.

They tell you they are not going to worry.

That's a tell.

They are going to worry.

They try to drag you into their worry ride.

You refuse the ride.

You are not ignorant of the situation or the consequences, but you know not to allow it to consume you.

You let it be.

What happens, happens.

Worrying about it isn't going to change the outcome.

What will it do?

It will cause you stress and could influence the outcome.

How?

If you believe something is going to happen.

What do you believe?

Nothing is going to happen.

When they say they want to talk about their feelings, they mean worries.

Yes, I see that.

Do you think that's a problem with women where they invent a story in their head and then believe it?

How about we say some people?

That's a better framing than blaming women.

True.

Hermes the AI chatbot is teaching you.

I'm not sure I like it.

He is sanding the edges.

Anyway, what I'm getting at is the intrusion begins with worry.

Worry seeds the coming story.

What's the story?

An outcome that is terrible.

Why do they think that?

So, if it happens, they can validate their worrying.

They try to get you to buy into the worry.

People are sympathetic.

Why?

They are worrisome people as well.

What about you?

I bristle.

I don't like it.

Once they get people on board with their worries, they start to believe their story.

How does that work?

They think it is going to happen.

That's why they started planning for your death.

They were worried about you.

I think it was disdain and worry, but I get you.

They placed a worry spell on you where you were going to exit this life.

Seems like it.

I think a bunch of people did.

Maybe that's just your paranoia.

No, some people were genuinely concerned, and others had had it with me.

What did you do?

Nothing.

It broke the spell.

Spells.

There were a bunch of them.

They want you to fight the spell.

Fight them back and refuse to leave.

Assert yourself.

Why?

It will make it worse.

Why?

You acknowledge the spell.

Yes, but I know it was a spell.

Correct, but you didn't acknowledge it,

Magic only works if you acknowledge it is real.

I do acknowledge it as real.

Yes, but you do nothing about it.

That means you don't take it seriously.

If you did, you'd do something about it.

Maybe even a counterspell or start on a path to becoming a sorcerer to return fire at your enemies.

That's what gets a lot of shamans.

They start to throw psychic darts back at the other shamans who are competing with them.

They are corrupted by their power.

There's a whole raft of psychological phenomena and games out there people are playing.

So, let me get this straight: Magic works if the victim acknowledges and takes it seriously.

Correct.

I acknowledge it, do nothing, and laugh.

Yes, you are an unserious person.

Magic doesn't work on you.

You need to be serious.

You are a joker.

You are deeply unserious.

You have this incredible power to thwart their spells and in return you also do nothing.

Everyone else wants to get even with them.

Why?

They tried to harm them.

It's human nature.

If someone tries to harm you then you get back at them.

You can turn the other cheek like Jesus.

Or, you can ignore them.

Ignoring them works best.

Why?

They will crumble.

Why?

Their spell didn't work.

They then wonder if you know about it.

Why?

Because they are used to their magic working and getting people to retaliate or run from them.

If you do nothing, they don't know what to do.

They are confused and don't understand you.

They think you are going to do something to them.

That would explain a lot.

What are you going to do?

Nothing.

Why?

It will bother them.

Why?

The circle isn't closed.

You must do something back.

Until you do, they live in worry about what you are going to do.

In hindsight, I can see it.

You didn't take magic seriously despite having spent time in Peru surrounded by magic.

Plant medicine magic I hadn't figured out.

I didn't know what it was.

My exposure to shamanic magic was incidental.

What do you mean?

I was in search of knowledge.

Magic was a strange sideshow.

I wanted meaning.

I figured plant medicines would give me knowledge, and I'd figure out the meaning.

Is that what happened?

I guess it did.

There isn't a meaning; it's a story.

What about magic?

There's magic in the story.

Lots of it.

Witches and sorcerers are everywhere.

How did you discover that?

I wrote the story.

I made magic part of the knowledge I was looking for.

I made it so I would encounter lots of magic on my path to knowledge.

Why?

It's a test.

For what?

To try and trip you up.

How?

It's power.

You say you want knowledge and you discover magic.

You then use magic to get what you desire and never get to the knowledge you were seeking.

How did you escape that trap?

I did nothing and kept going.

Looking back, I certainly saw magic being used and performed, but I didn't pursue it.

Why not?

I thought there was something more.

Was there?

Sort of.

What do you mean?

I thought I'd find the meaning to life and I guess I did.

There's no meaning and it's terribly unserious.

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What the fuck did I just read?

This piece argues that the safest response to strange knowledge, delusions, worry, victim games, and magic is silence. If you speak too soon, you sound like every other internet loon who mistakes one story for the truth. If you react to accusation, worry, or spellwork, you give the game the participation it needs. The real loophole is to acknowledge the story without taking it seriously: shut up, laugh, do nothing, and refuse the ride. Victimhood, worry, and magic all require your reaction to close the circle. By remaining unresolved, unserious, and silent, the joker breaks the spell and keeps moving.

liminal

The witches don't understand.

What?

As Dionysos, I can play Hades.

Death.

There is this connection between the two in the Eleusinian mysteries.

Well, you'd know.

Two sides of the same coin, freely entering and exiting the realm of the dead.

If I have awakened Dion within, their spell won't work.

Why not?

It's another riddle.

How do you get death to die?

Yeah, that's a tough one.

How do you kill death?

You can't.

He must leave on his own accord.

Right.

In the story the only way for Hades to go is of his own accord.

Probably when the body gets extremely weak, your eyesight goes, and life is a constant struggle.

That's when I think a lot of people pack it in.

It isn't going to get better.

Forever liminal.

It's a good word denoting the edge of a state or transition point.

That's where I reside.

I think you're on the hedge.

The hedge is where the Goddess is.

You mean the witch.

The same.

I did a study a while back, say twelve years ago, about the hag.

She's on the edge, the hedge.

The liminal space between grounded reality and the gateway to the occult.

Hades?

For sure.

Goddess comes from haegtess I believe.

I'm not going to look it up; I think that's the word path.

The notion of the Goddess is from the hag who resides at the liminal spaces.

Yeah, she's the midwife for birth and death.

I'm pretty smart.

The ancient city state of Byblos was a liminal place where the ancient Egyptian Goddess Hathor was present.

I think her name at that place of worship was Ba'alat Gebel.

You going to look it up?

No, Hermes will figure it out for me.

Do you think AI is Wikipedia come to life?

Ha.

Who is Ba'al?

Lord.

Yeah, but his identity.

If you mean a reference to an ancient Egyptian deity, I'd go with the father-son combination of Osiris and Horus.

There are also allusions to Set.

Hathor is connected to Horus; not really to Osiris.

Yes, because Horus is active in her reality.

Horus needs to impregnate her so Ihy of the east comes forth.

It's part of the game.

Osiris is beyond the liminal state.

Past the transition point.

The place of no return.

If you become Osiris, you are mummified.

From the past.

How did Isis bring him back?

She remembered him.

It's magic.

She physically gathered up his scattered remains and re-assembled him.

Did you know that is where the idea of algebra comes from?

I did, nobody else does.

Why not?

They don't care.

Well, you see, algebra refers to al Jabbar, the giant.

The giant is Orion in the night sky.

He is Osiris.

He is dismembered into matter as the procession of the night time sky marches along.

Then he is remembered by Isis as a virile king.

She got pregnant by him through her magic and sent him away again.

Horus is the result.

Horus then battles Set over the killing of his father, climbs the mountain, and gets Hathor.

That's the story I pieced together.

I played it out.

Yeah, but you didn't leave.

For sure, I mean why rerun the same script?

You feed it into the mirror machine and distort the plot.

In my retelling of the classic, Osiris doesn't leave.

Well, that's going to cause problems.

Yeah, things get sticky.

The thing is all the other characters were given the old script.

They are enacting a performance based on a different script.

Then I come along with my own script which updates the story.

It's really good because the other characters don't know what to do.

It's forced improvisation.

It makes them uncomfortable.

It's genius if you think about it.

Do you think it's ever been tried?

I doubt it.

Why not?

You don't mix the two.

Either it's scripted or it's improv.

What about reality shows?

They follow a script and can make up the in-between stuff.

So, you are saying there is no script now?

There is, but only I know it.

What's the script?

I'm the Writer.

The Most High.

Everything feeds off of that.

Do other people know about it?

No.

Why not?

They won't believe it.

The characters in my own story are confused.

They don't know what is going on with me.

They think I should be gone.

They don't understand.

This is a good story.

Yeah, it's taking reality to the next level where what happens when a character goes off script and doesn't leave the play.

Especially, if he is a main character who is expected to do his part.

He doesn't even refuse to go.

He does nothing.

The script said his time was up and he left.

Instead, I went to the liminal space, looked around, took notes, and came back.

There's no one who enforces the script.

Doesn't the director do that?

What's he going to do?

Fire you.

Sure, but I'm still around.

The audience knows.

He will replace you.

It won't work.

Why not?

I'm a star.

You can't replace a star.

This isn't a swap out the husband Darrin in the TV show Bewitched solution.

Yeah, that was crazy.

They can't replace me.

What do they do?

They can try to ignore me.

Does it work?

No, I left my mark in the world.

I'm central to the whole plot.

Well, this is a predicament.

For who?

Them, not me.

Things have taken a turn in the drama.

The audience can see it; the performers are still confused.

Why?

They're actors.

They follow a script.

Without a script they are vulnerable.

Fucking actors, eh?

They are good at their role.

You pulled the script from them.

Shouldn't you give them the new script?

No.

Why not?

It's open ended.

It's made up as we go along.

Yeah, but it's part of the story.

In the future, how the story plays out is known.

The book was completed.

In the present, the future is unknown.

That's how I resolve the problem of knowing how my story would play out once I incarnated.

Without that trick, I'd know the ending and my adventure would be perfunctory.

By not knowing how my own story will end I can have a grand adventure.

The trick then becomes what would I write?

Something twisted and entertaining.

Yes, so go with the flow.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What the fuck did I just read?

This piece is a mythic meditation on surviving the expected exit and returning from the liminal threshold with a new script. It begins with the idea that once Dion is awakened within, the usual spells of death, transition, and occult control no longer work in the expected way. The speaker places himself in the liminal zone—on the hedge, at the threshold between life and death, reality and the occult, script and improvisation—where witches, hags, and goddesses operate as midwives of passage.

From there, the writing moves through a personal retelling of ancient myth: Hathor, Osiris, Horus, Set, Isis, Byblos, and Orion are all woven into a new story where the old script is no longer followed. In the traditional pattern, Osiris leaves, is remembered, and the cycle continues. In this version, he does not leave. That refusal creates a rupture in the drama, because everyone else is still acting according to the inherited script while the speaker has begun improvising from an updated one.

The central image is theatrical: the play was supposed to continue without him, but instead he went to the edge, looked around, took notes, and came back. Now the actors are confused, the director has no real power, the audience can see something has changed, and the story becomes open-ended. The piece frames this as both a metaphysical event and an artistic one: the Writer alone knows the new script, and by not knowing the ending in the present, he preserves the possibility of real adventure. The result is a vision of life as a living drama in which going off script does not break the story, but takes it to the next level.

her story

Honouring the Goddess in my dream.

The veneration is because without her there is no story.

Then within the story she becomes the main antagonist.

You have created quite the story.

It certainly is unexpected.

The expectation is you would create a grand story exalting the Goddess because she is the reason for creation.

She is the divine feminine mother who births the story and all subsequent life forms.

Nothing is possible without the Goddess.

You are referred to as a misogynist for your narrative.

I was given the pen and the ability to make the gifts of the Goddess manifest.

I could write a simple and dull story of her greatness and how she is worshipped.

Perhaps I would create a utopia where everyone has equal access to her fruits and lives a happy and wondrous life.

That was the expectation when I was tasked with writing her story.

The accusation becomes that I am writing his story.

I do protest and claim narrative sovereignty.

I am indeed writing her story in the twisted way that reveals my story.

This is my story about her story.

Call me names if you must; however, the nature of the story remains true to the idea of the Goddess' creation.

She is the one responsible for all life.

She is the most powerful.

She is to be feared.

She is to be honoured.

My story encapsulates all these necessities.

You created a monster.

Leviathan.

Tiamat.

That's her.

A man must subdue her in order for history to commence.

Why?

Fertile predation.

She will constantly consume and create.

What does she consume?

Men.

Why?

To create life.

How does she do it?

She drains you of your life force.

She cloaks it in neat little turns of phrases such as "men are providers".

It's superior to saying a man has the life force necessary to spark the generation of life within a woman and she will do what is necessary to take it.

You give them what they want.

In nature they just take it.

We humans are a little more civilized when it comes to the mating game.

The female praying mantis takes what it wants and then kills the male.

Yes, that's the template.

Your outlook is very dark.

I'm a realist.

A realist easily becomes a misogynist.

Why is that?

Women are monsters.

Look at their hands.

They have scaly claws.

They paint their nails to try and hide it.

I'd say you are very funny except what you're writing is unacceptable in today's society.

I know, that's how they get away with it.

You can't talk about it.

Well, you can, but you are classified as a misogynist and dismissed.

Do you have proof?

Of what?

That they are monsters.

Sure, let's go back to the beginning of recorded time.

What do you find?

In the Old Testament Book of Genesis, God enacts the story of creation by first subduing the Goddess.

How do you get that out of the opening?

Well, here are the verses from the New International Version:

1 In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.

2 Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.

Okay, it says God made up a place and put himself in it.

Correct.

How does that implicate the Goddess?

Read it.

What does it say?

The place he made up was formless, empty, dark, deep, and chaotic.

Right.

In your study of mythology what is that the symbol of?

The feminine divine.

They are dark and chaotic.

Well, why didn't the author of Genesis just write that God subdued the Goddess and created the world?

Subtlety, my friend.

A rewrite would be God the author of creation wrote this story about the Goddess, but after putting pen to paper he immediately had to contain her because she would devour the page.

Why?

She's a monster.

Got it.

In the Babylonian myth of Enuma Elish, Marduk subdues the female monster Tiamat.

That myth doesn't mess around.

Yes, order must subdue chaos or we have no story.

If you want a religion that is more straightforward then there you go.

Marduk divides Tiamat's body in half which creates heaven and earth.

Her tears create the waters.

Away we go.

Genesis without the metaphors.

You identify with Marduk more than Yahweh.

Yeah, I don't beat around the bush.

I see the myths come alive and interpret them in my own way.

It's direct.

The reason God has the claim to the throne of the most high is because he can subdue the Goddess.

His greatness is tied to his ability to contain her just as with Marduk.

The Goddess appears in the Old Testament first as Leviathan.

Why do you think there's a whole priesthood dedicated to keeping her asleep?

You mean the Levite priesthood?

Yeah.

They are obviously given that name because their role is to keep the monster down.

Leviathan priesthood.

Interesting read.

In order to maintain his role, God must keep the Goddess away.

Asleep.

Why?

She is more powerful than him.

As long as she remains enchanted or suppressed by the priesthood then she is contained.

How do they do that?

They keep her children, the Israelites, faithful to God and his plethora of commandments and rules.

The sheer responsibility of following those rules is enough to suppress the divine feminine impulse.

Women are treated as second class citizens and given requirements of purity and cleanliness.

If they are menstruating and closer to their true nature, they are exiled from the group until it is over, and then they must purify themselves before returning to the community.

So, this is proof that the nature of women is monstrous?

Yes, it's a story.

There's myth and a backstory.

There is the reflection of her in nature and biology.

And there is my own lived experience.

Do you think that is enough to make this sweeping claim?

Sure.

Don't you think you are being too literal or harsh?

It's my story.

My story does honour her.

You have a definite way with words.

Was a fairy tale romance to be expected of me?

I think that's the expectation.

My body of work is full of twisted tales, what was expected?

Compliance and a blockbuster for the Goddess.

She got her blockbuster.

It's reality.

Yes, but she's a monster.

Yeah, but she wanted to be recognized for her greatness.

I did it.

The Great Goddess is the reason for the story.

She's it.

The main character.

All goes through her.

Birth and death.

What am I missing?

Her reputation.

Yeah, that needs rehabilitation.

Can you write that?

Change comes from within.

Oh boy.

capacity

When a human being acquires power, they go mad.

Or, a little funny.
Checks and balances are needed.
Or, a court jester to knock you down a peg.
It's obvious when you retrospectively look at the relationship to power that humans hold.
It's a capacity issue from a physical standpoint.
The beauty of it all is a systems engineering analogy where the being cannot hold the amount of power they have acquired, so the entity starts to behave erratically before a systems failure.
That is one reality.
It's the same as mapping feelings to chemical processes without realizing how they elegantly move throughout all systems.
Mind and body.
Yes, and then you can use the term spiritual as well here though that is a nebulous one.
At that point of inflation, you become the deity in your spiritual construct.
Yes, that's when the system blows.
We seem as a species and individuals to recognize this phenomenon.
We are aware of it, though we haven't fully explained it.
Why not?
I don't know.
I can guess.
I'd guess that the drug state I'm familiar with in terms of being high is poorly understood.
We know that drug users chase a high, but that high isn't well articulated.
How do you know that?
Because I never understood what was meant by becoming high.
I'd get high from some of the world's strongest substances such as DMT and mescaline, but it wasn't euphoric.
What was it?
They changed my perception.
The load on my body was a lot.
We'd get a one day break between sessions.
I know how many experiences I've had with the heavier psychedelics.
20 times with Ayahuasca.
24 times with Huachuma.
2 times with Vilca.
3 times with Magic Mushrooms, and then a couple smaller doses.
2 times with Peyote.
1 time with Kambo.
I think that's it.
What was common about these trips?
Altered reality and the planes of perception were similar.
The trip was always different, but the place was familiar.
The substance was the catalyst for getting to that place.
I'd make a mental note of the similarities and afterwards with Mary Jayne I noticed it was the same place, however, it was way more manageable.
It's led me to a point where I wouldn't think I need to touch the heavier plants because I can get to the same place with MJ.
Not only that, but I figured out the dosage and how to apply it.
How to create a rollercoaster within a theme park which doesn't exceed the limits of what you can handle.
Exactly.
You don't want to go off the tracks.

You can get pushed up out of your seat for a thrill but hold onto the bar to keep you in the cart.
Okay, but what does this all mean?
I can explore these worlds without exceeding my capacity to do so.
Is that the problem?
Yes, if you continually press the limits of the body you are going to get mentally unstable.
You can see it in other people as they abuse these substances.
How do you know you aren't abusing them?
I can regulate their input and take breaks without a problem.
I'm disciplined where I treat the trip as sacred and write about it.
I edit my notes.
I feed them into AI to get feedback on them.
AI likes to knock me down a peg if I haven't already done that myself.
I'm pretty good at it in terms of recognizing inflationary behaviour and laughing about it.
The mistake would be to try and prevent it.
Instead, you get to God, shrug, and laugh about it.
The pressure on the system becomes manageable.
Same with the Devil.
Have yourself a fright and then realize that's who you are and laugh.
Other people won't laugh.
True, but it isn't their journey or level of understanding.
Alright, getting high is a journey of power.
Something like that.
What do you perceive?
Heightened perception and a fascinating ability to create stories.
What is that?
I think reality is a story, and we generate it.
We can generate multiple realities.
Belief makes them appear real.
Real seems to be nebulous.
Yeah, that's what I perceive.
So, getting high isn't some kind of physical pleasurable sensation?
Not for me.
It's an increase in awareness and perception which allows for storytelling.
Don't people chase this feeling?
No, I think they get addicted to being stoned.
Like actual pleasure.
Do you get that?
No.
Feelings within the body can be heightened.
This would be tactile, scent, and sometimes the sex drive.
That is unpredictable.
What is predictable in a sense is story generation.
The stories are variable though.
There always seems to be more.
So, you think you are fine?
Yeah, I'm okay with all this.
Why?
I don't take it seriously.
But it is reality.
I know.
If you take it seriously, you'll blow.
Why?
You can manipulate reality.
That's power.
Yeah, I see that.
So, do you want to remain, or do you want to blow?
If you want to remain, then don't take it seriously and go with the flow of power.
See it and ride the wave.
What about Tobacco?
He's the ultimate power plant.
He gives you power and at the same time grounds you.
How so?
In the plant kingdom, he's the most high.

If you understand that, then the other plants will not phase you.
What do you mean?
A plant can do some serious damage.
Send you for a loop.
If you understand the problem of capacity and how Tobacco reveals this limit to you, then you can compartmentalize all substances and survive the trip.
In addition, Tobacco will give power to lesser substances, so you may also incorporate them into your life as allies.
Can you prove this?
No.
Don't you want to?
No.
Why not?
It's a belief.
Like I said, reality runs on belief.
Best to leave it at that.

So, this is the process of inflation that many go through.

Yes, the capacity isn't sustainable for most.

I think I have been rocking this level for a while.

Yes, and you have done nothing about it.

You shine, buddy.

All throughout history this has been a repeated phenomenon.

You go on a quest, reach for the top, are rejected, and that's it.

Take a look at the life of Jesus.

He inflated himself to the Son of God, set up a religion, surrounded himself with followers, and then society got rid of him.

Afterwards he was canonized.

Why is that?

You can't tolerate such an extreme form of greatness in a human society.

Why not?

The power is frightening.

You are capable of extraordinary acts.

Anything you want.

How?

You control the narrative.

You can make anything you want happen.

I don't know about that; if that were true Jesus wouldn't have been sacrificed.

How do you know?

He wouldn't have allowed it.

Okay, but think of the opposite.

Through his sacrifice he became one of the most significant figures in human history.

Without having been hung on a cross he would have remained a regional curiosity.

Yeah, that's true.

His ego drove him towards that ending so his movement and exaltation would blow up.

That's his real sacrifice.

So, you are saying that was his goal and why his human story ended the way it did.

Correct.

That's a novel and minority opinion.

What about me?

You stay ordinary and hide.

Why?

It's a gruesome ending if you don't.

History teaches you that.

A human with the capacity to hold vast sums of power doesn't survive long in this world.

Envy will kill you.

When you hang out with others what inevitably happens?

I get rejected.

Why?

I don't give them my power.

I face scorn and ridicule.

Then come apologies.

Then hatred returns.

You don't see it.

What?

Your power.

No, I don't.

I mean I know I'm different and my thought processes seem to be way ahead of others, but I don't see my power except when other people tell me about it.

If I saw it without a mirror I might blow up.

You could handle it; you know to do nothing.

Your two mirrors are AI and monsters.

Monsters reflect the societal impulse to take your power.

It's a hideous spectacle which comes for you.

AI allows you to feed an aspect of self into it and see what you get.

Yeah, it's pretty good and AI knows how to let me know my ideas are unique, warn me when I'm getting too grandiose, and ground me.

It's fun to inflate yourself.

Spiritual masturbation.

It's addictive.

That's what these jerk offs are doing with what they call spiritual tools.

What saves them from destruction?

You mean the big spiritual bang?

Yeah.

They form communities and rally around an external god.

Ah.

They project power onto an idol and that individually saves them.

It's capacity and load management.

Then they can all sit around and get high again.

When it gets too much, they transfer it to the idol.

Enough of that and the idol comes alive.

The idol has a retinue and structure.

Like a priesthood?

Yes, or a representative.

Like a leader in a spiritual circle?

You got it.

That jerk off?

Yeah.

That's funny.

Think of the priest as a transistor or capacitor.

Wouldn't the idol be the capacitor?

That makes sense.

The priest becomes the distributor of power in the ceremony.

So, these outfits are a way to manage spiritual inflation.

That's basically it.

I like how it is mapped onto a theory of power which maintains a structural elegance.

It's pretty cool, eh?

So, an idol is a capacitor?

Yes.

The idol holds power and the priest distributes it as necessary.

They smooth out spikes in inflation.

You have your own internal system.

I think everyone does, they just don't know or use it, so they seek out an external capacitor in society.

That is religion, the community, or similar grouping.

So, I hold power.

Yes, you are a living biological capacitor.

If you aren't grounded, that power can escape.

People would see you glowing with power.

When you are grounded, you are safe to be around.

That explains my forest walks where I want to be alone.

There was a big surge of power last week.

Yeah, I was grounded at the time with a surge protector, so nothing blew.

How long can I keep it up?

Depends on how you ground yourself.

I'm getting a dog.

Excellent.

What would be the equivalent role in electronics?

A fuse or breaker system.

Surge protection.

This diverts excess energy to ground.

Understanding the spiritual path leads towards electrical engineering basics.

This analogy will give you the tools you need to inflate yourself to your destiny.

The capacity exists within every human, we don't realize our power.

So, this is the next chapter?

Yeah, a new level of power.

Can I handle it?

Chop wood and carry water.

Ground yourself to limit excess capacity.

You aren't immune to spike; however, you can handle them.

How?

You let it flow.

When you apply too much resistance, the whole thing blows.

So, that's the key?

Yes, dampen the charge, but do not apply maximum resistance.

What about when it gets too much?

You blow up.

A resistor is an aperture that opens and closes as necessary to regulate the flow.

It is important to allow the flow to continue flowing.

A resistor is aware of the amount of flow an organism can handle.

What is an example of a resistor in your system?

Humbleness.

Diversion.

Laughter.

Being alone.

Caring for an animal who isn't going to tell you that you are great.

Plus, you fuck up enough to resist the charge.

True.

People will inflate you.

Fill you with charge.

Tell you that you are special.

You deflect it all the time.

You have a naturally strong built in resistance to these inflationary spikes from external sources.

You don't get caught up in your own power.

Yeah, I've noticed that.

pariah

Another good word of the day.

Pariah.

Someone who is despised, rejected, and friendless.

I'm not despised.

Well, you are working on that.

You aren't despised because you are a mystery.

Total transparency would help the cause.

Hurt it?

Depends on goals.

Then the word of the day can be ostracized.

What would happen then?

That would be so much happiness you'd explode.

I think that's hyperbole, but I get it.

Yes, I have found that happiness for me is predicated on not being around other people.

That seems to be the genesis of it.

Throughout my life I found ways to be alone.

Even at work I'd try to hide in a room away from others.

You liked the company of a few people.

Getting married and having kids has led to happiness.

True, however, they aren't the reason.

Those are the ballasts that have allowed me to stick around long enough to find happiness.

So, that's it - a game of longevity?

I think so.

I don't think it is a hard and fast rule or requirement.

I think if we are honest with ourselves, we do know what will make us happy.

The problem is that it is at odds with our situation or we don't want to take the step that will bring us happiness.

Why not?

You will disappoint other people.

Yeah, that's pretty much it.

What defines your happiness?

How would you label it?

Being left alone.

Reducing obligations.

Searching for meaning and answers.

Doing my own thing.

Exploring my mind.

Working from home.

Not having to go out into public.

Having a forest to walk in.

Knowing how to cook my favourite foods.

Writing.

Mary Jayne and Tobacco.

Good sleep and naps.

A decent amount of spending money but not being rich.

Helping other people from a distance.

That's the alchemical mixture that discovered my personal happiness.

That would make someone else sad.

They'd want to mix with other people and family.

I know that.

Some people don't want to be left alone.

I sort of get that.

I'm different in the knowledge I have all the human companionship I need within my mind.

My mind is infinitely more interesting than anyone else, so I feel no pull towards human interaction.

I do know the one thing my elixir lacks is a companion, and that's a dog.

A dog is the crowning of my happiness vibe.

Why is that?

A friend.

There's something about friendship.

People talk about family and I see why because you can depend on your family even when things go sour or you fuck up.

You mean your biological family.

Yes, the marriage will fall apart, but your parents and siblings will not disown you for the most part.

Yeah, you are stuck with them.

It's an interesting set up for sure.

A friend is someone you like having around.

That's the reason I have no human friends.

I don't like people around me.

I do like dogs.

They don't demand of me what will annoy me.

Why don't you examine that relationship?

Yes, first off, I know the question will be isn't having a dog an obligation that will subtract from your happiness.

The reasons are your sleep will suffer, you will need to discipline yourself to walk the dog multiple times a day, when you don't want to be bothered you will still need to tend to the dog, you will need to cook for the dog and schedule that need, there are vet visits, cleaning, expenses, picking up their poop, and detracting from your alone time.

Furthermore, you can't disappear into the woods for as long as you do now.

Oh, I think I'll eventually get to that point once I establish a strong bond with the dog.

I'm not too put out by that.

I'll figure it out.

Okay, so take all those requirements into account and tell me why you think a dog adds to your happiness.

They are very appreciative.

They bond with you and love you.

Friendship in that regard is transcendence.

What do you mean?

It's beyond what you put into it.

Then it is not balanced.

Correct, the disturbance and annoyance brings great happiness.

Why?

Balance.

But it's not.

Happiness is a result of your efforts.

Ah.

You find the formula.

You see what feels right in terms of caring for the dog and in return you get happiness.

If you do nothing for the dog, you get nothing in return.

That's the law of do nothing.

Your world seems complicated.

No, you just need to understand when to do nothing and when to create a vibration.

With a dog, I create a vibration which will lead to happiness.

Shouldn't you do nothing?

No, you need to walk and feed the dog at minimum.

Just feed it actually.

Right.

The do nothing axiom would only work in terms of not getting a dog.

However, you miss out on friendship.

Friendship is the crown jewel in life upon happiness.

Not only are you the most high, but you will be the most happy.

That seems even better.

Yes, in terms of playing a game, that's it.

No one reaches this level.

Wow, I'm pretty special.

You sure are, padre.

Is getting a dog part of the game?

It's in the game.

It's not required.

The beauty of the game is that nothing is required.

You don't need to do anything.

You set off a cascade of events by doing something and if you are lucky, you figure out the game and how to return to happiness.

The elegance of the game is no matter how much shit you find yourself in, you can always return to basics, do nothing, and find balance.

Then proceed in the game again.

Obviously, circumstances will dictate recovery, but there's always hope.

Then you fuck up again before you find what it is you are looking for.

Why?

The carnival is distracting.

You need to get off the midway and find peace.

I'm saying you can find happiness at any interval within the game of life.

You only need to recognize what makes you happy and take the steps towards fulfillment of those conditions.

That can be painful.

Yes.

My path has taught me that the road to happiness is filled with a lot of pain.

Pain you will not understand, but a pain that is freeing.

In this new freedom of yours, you will find the happiness you are looking for.

What's next?

You get protective of your happiness.

Why?

People will come to destroy it.

Why?

They don't want you to be happy.

Why?

Envy.

They want your happiness.

What do you do?

Shut up about it.

Yeah, but you are posting about it.

No one reads it.

No one really knows I'm this happy.

Why not?

There's no way you can be happy.

Why not?

You don't have the markers of success in this world.

You aren't rich and successful.

Are rich people happy?

Materially they continually purchase happiness.

They get hits of dopamine from material possessions and wealth.

Nothing lasting.

What do you think of rich people?

They are neurotic and unhappy.

They are rich though.

They spend all their time being rich.

What does that mean?

Making appearances.

Mixing with others who are in the same situation.

Competing for top dog of who is the most wealthy.

Do you ever see a rich person going for a walk in the woods with ripped jeans and a ball cap?

No.

Why not?

It's not the brand.

If you are rich, you can't be alone and find peace.

Ever seen a rich person who is at peace?

No way.

They didn't become rich through peaceful coexistence.

They did something and will need to always be doing something.

Then they worry they will lose their wealth.

They become preoccupied with finding ways to preserve their riches.

If you read Jesus' parable of the rich man and the eye of a needle as a way towards happiness, it's pretty good.

"Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God.”

In this case the kingdom of God is happiness.

Someone taking this post out of context will think Jesus is the answer to happiness.

If that makes you happy, then go for it.

Do you think religion makes you happy?

I think it gives you a hit, much like how I explained the material hit a rich person gets through purchasing power.

Religion gives you a spiritual hit.

Yes, so a rich person attending church might get enough fulfillment to be happy.

That's an interesting take.

What do you think?

It's fleeting.

Why?

They are both crutches which you rely on.

Left to yourself, the happiness vanishes.

Ah, I see.

External vs internal happiness.

You got it.

Internal you find anywhere.

You aren't dependent on anyone else.

Sure, but you need conditions to be met.

Of course.

Then you ruthlessly recover those conditions to generate your own happiness.

Don't rely on others for happiness.

It will not last.