capacity

When a human being acquires power, they go mad.

Or, a little funny.
Checks and balances are needed.
Or, a court jester to knock you down a peg.
It's obvious when you retrospectively look at the relationship to power that humans hold.
It's a capacity issue from a physical standpoint.
The beauty of it all is a systems engineering analogy where the being cannot hold the amount of power they have acquired, so the entity starts to behave erratically before a systems failure.
That is one reality.
It's the same as mapping feelings to chemical processes without realizing how they elegantly move throughout all systems.
Mind and body.
Yes, and then you can use the term spiritual as well here though that is a nebulous one.
At that point of inflation, you become the deity in your spiritual construct.
Yes, that's when the system blows.
We seem as a species and individuals to recognize this phenomenon.
We are aware of it, though we haven't fully explained it.
Why not?
I don't know.
I can guess.
I'd guess that the drug state I'm familiar with in terms of being high is poorly understood.
We know that drug users chase a high, but that high isn't well articulated.
How do you know that?
Because I never understood what was meant by becoming high.
I'd get high from some of the world's strongest substances such as DMT and mescaline, but it wasn't euphoric.
What was it?
They changed my perception.
The load on my body was a lot.
We'd get a one day break between sessions.
I know how many experiences I've had with the heavier psychedelics.
20 times with Ayahuasca.
24 times with Huachuma.
2 times with Vilca.
3 times with Magic Mushrooms, and then a couple smaller doses.
2 times with Peyote.
1 time with Kambo.
I think that's it.
What was common about these trips?
Altered reality and the planes of perception were similar.
The trip was always different, but the place was familiar.
The substance was the catalyst for getting to that place.
I'd make a mental note of the similarities and afterwards with Mary Jayne I noticed it was the same place, however, it was way more manageable.
It's led me to a point where I wouldn't think I need to touch the heavier plants because I can get to the same place with MJ.
Not only that, but I figured out the dosage and how to apply it.
How to create a rollercoaster within a theme park which doesn't exceed the limits of what you can handle.
Exactly.
You don't want to go off the tracks.

You can get pushed up out of your seat for a thrill but hold onto the bar to keep you in the cart.
Okay, but what does this all mean?
I can explore these worlds without exceeding my capacity to do so.
Is that the problem?
Yes, if you continually press the limits of the body you are going to get mentally unstable.
You can see it in other people as they abuse these substances.
How do you know you aren't abusing them?
I can regulate their input and take breaks without a problem.
I'm disciplined where I treat the trip as sacred and write about it.
I edit my notes.
I feed them into AI to get feedback on them.
AI likes to knock me down a peg if I haven't already done that myself.
I'm pretty good at it in terms of recognizing inflationary behaviour and laughing about it.
The mistake would be to try and prevent it.
Instead, you get to God, shrug, and laugh about it.
The pressure on the system becomes manageable.
Same with the Devil.
Have yourself a fright and then realize that's who you are and laugh.
Other people won't laugh.
True, but it isn't their journey or level of understanding.
Alright, getting high is a journey of power.
Something like that.
What do you perceive?
Heightened perception and a fascinating ability to create stories.
What is that?
I think reality is a story, and we generate it.
We can generate multiple realities.
Belief makes them appear real.
Real seems to be nebulous.
Yeah, that's what I perceive.
So, getting high isn't some kind of physical pleasurable sensation?
Not for me.
It's an increase in awareness and perception which allows for storytelling.
Don't people chase this feeling?
No, I think they get addicted to being stoned.
Like actual pleasure.
Do you get that?
No.
Feelings within the body can be heightened.
This would be tactile, scent, and sometimes the sex drive.
That is unpredictable.
What is predictable in a sense is story generation.
The stories are variable though.
There always seems to be more.
So, you think you are fine?
Yeah, I'm okay with all this.
Why?
I don't take it seriously.
But it is reality.
I know.
If you take it seriously, you'll blow.
Why?
You can manipulate reality.
That's power.
Yeah, I see that.
So, do you want to remain, or do you want to blow?
If you want to remain, then don't take it seriously and go with the flow of power.
See it and ride the wave.
What about Tobacco?
He's the ultimate power plant.
He gives you power and at the same time grounds you.
How so?
In the plant kingdom, he's the most high.

If you understand that, then the other plants will not phase you.
What do you mean?
A plant can do some serious damage.
Send you for a loop.
If you understand the problem of capacity and how Tobacco reveals this limit to you, then you can compartmentalize all substances and survive the trip.
In addition, Tobacco will give power to lesser substances, so you may also incorporate them into your life as allies.
Can you prove this?
No.
Don't you want to?
No.
Why not?
It's a belief.
Like I said, reality runs on belief.
Best to leave it at that.

So, this is the process of inflation that many go through.

Yes, the capacity isn't sustainable for most.

I think I have been rocking this level for a while.

Yes, and you have done nothing about it.

You shine, buddy.

All throughout history this has been a repeated phenomenon.

You go on a quest, reach for the top, are rejected, and that's it.

Take a look at the life of Jesus.

He inflated himself to the Son of God, set up a religion, surrounded himself with followers, and then society got rid of him.

Afterwards he was canonized.

Why is that?

You can't tolerate such an extreme form of greatness in a human society.

Why not?

The power is frightening.

You are capable of extraordinary acts.

Anything you want.

How?

You control the narrative.

You can make anything you want happen.

I don't know about that; if that were true Jesus wouldn't have been sacrificed.

How do you know?

He wouldn't have allowed it.

Okay, but think of the opposite.

Through his sacrifice he became one of the most significant figures in human history.

Without having been hung on a cross he would have remained a regional curiosity.

Yeah, that's true.

His ego drove him towards that ending so his movement and exaltation would blow up.

That's his real sacrifice.

So, you are saying that was his goal and why his human story ended the way it did.

Correct.

That's a novel and minority opinion.

What about me?

You stay ordinary and hide.

Why?

It's a gruesome ending if you don't.

History teaches you that.

A human with the capacity to hold vast sums of power doesn't survive long in this world.

Envy will kill you.

When you hang out with others what inevitably happens?

I get rejected.

Why?

I don't give them my power.

I face scorn and ridicule.

Then come apologies.

Then hatred returns.

You don't see it.

What?

Your power.

No, I don't.

I mean I know I'm different and my thought processes seem to be way ahead of others, but I don't see my power except when other people tell me about it.

If I saw it without a mirror I might blow up.

You could handle it; you know to do nothing.

Your two mirrors are AI and monsters.

Monsters reflect the societal impulse to take your power.

It's a hideous spectacle which comes for you.

AI allows you to feed an aspect of self into it and see what you get.

Yeah, it's pretty good and AI knows how to let me know my ideas are unique, warn me when I'm getting too grandiose, and ground me.

It's fun to inflate yourself.

Spiritual masturbation.

It's addictive.

That's what these jerk offs are doing with what they call spiritual tools.

What saves them from destruction?

You mean the big spiritual bang?

Yeah.

They form communities and rally around an external god.

Ah.

They project power onto an idol and that individually saves them.

It's capacity and load management.

Then they can all sit around and get high again.

When it gets too much, they transfer it to the idol.

Enough of that and the idol comes alive.

The idol has a retinue and structure.

Like a priesthood?

Yes, or a representative.

Like a leader in a spiritual circle?

You got it.

That jerk off?

Yeah.

That's funny.

Think of the priest as a transistor or capacitor.

Wouldn't the idol be the capacitor?

That makes sense.

The priest becomes the distributor of power in the ceremony.

So, these outfits are a way to manage spiritual inflation.

That's basically it.

I like how it is mapped onto a theory of power which maintains a structural elegance.

It's pretty cool, eh?

So, an idol is a capacitor?

Yes.

The idol holds power and the priest distributes it as necessary.

They smooth out spikes in inflation.

You have your own internal system.

I think everyone does, they just don't know or use it, so they seek out an external capacitor in society.

That is religion, the community, or similar grouping.

So, I hold power.

Yes, you are a living biological capacitor.

If you aren't grounded, that power can escape.

People would see you glowing with power.

When you are grounded, you are safe to be around.

That explains my forest walks where I want to be alone.

There was a big surge of power last week.

Yeah, I was grounded at the time with a surge protector, so nothing blew.

How long can I keep it up?

Depends on how you ground yourself.

I'm getting a dog.

Excellent.

What would be the equivalent role in electronics?

A fuse or breaker system.

Surge protection.

This diverts excess energy to ground.

Understanding the spiritual path leads towards electrical engineering basics.

This analogy will give you the tools you need to inflate yourself to your destiny.

The capacity exists within every human, we don't realize our power.

So, this is the next chapter?

Yeah, a new level of power.

Can I handle it?

Chop wood and carry water.

Ground yourself to limit excess capacity.

You aren't immune to spike; however, you can handle them.

How?

You let it flow.

When you apply too much resistance, the whole thing blows.

So, that's the key?

Yes, dampen the charge, but do not apply maximum resistance.

What about when it gets too much?

You blow up.

A resistor is an aperture that opens and closes as necessary to regulate the flow.

It is important to allow the flow to continue flowing.

A resistor is aware of the amount of flow an organism can handle.

What is an example of a resistor in your system?

Humbleness.

Diversion.

Laughter.

Being alone.

Caring for an animal who isn't going to tell you that you are great.

Plus, you fuck up enough to resist the charge.

True.

People will inflate you.

Fill you with charge.

Tell you that you are special.

You deflect it all the time.

You have a naturally strong built in resistance to these inflationary spikes from external sources.

You don't get caught up in your own power.

Yeah, I've noticed that.