lust for life

My family I was born into was not my choice.

I appeared, though with what I know, it was my choice.

That was Eros making that choice.

Do you think Eros then becomes Dion?

As this incredible mystery reveals itself, I'd speculate the answer is yes.

The impetus for the attraction between two people who are destined to mate is Eros.

That I am aware of.

You have never thought about where does Eros go?

Well, he or she is the baby.

Yes.

The baby is Eros plus one.

You mean the new record of Eros.

Yes.

The life force that comes forth from the master record.

You're getting warm.

The master record is Eros.

Yes, so apply this to your ancient Egyptian knowledge.

Eros is what they considered the soul called the Ba, and the coming forth of a new life form from the Ba is the Ka.

There are an infinite number of Kas from the one Ba.

Are there unique Bas?

That's where lineages are from.

Everything would be traced to a master Ba, however I think where it gets mixed is the combination of the Ba with the feminine principle of the reverse of the Ba which is the Ab.

The Ab is the heart, and the Goddess supplies those.

So, you are saying the Ba is masculine and the Ab is feminine.

That's what I'm telling you.

That would mean my idea of Eros as Cupid is masculine desire.

That's how it would look.

Feminine desire is love.

Yeah, but what kind of love?

Erotic desire.

Is that romantic love?

No, it's wanting.

So, lust then?

Yes.

Is lust, love?

Yes.

Then it's the highest form of love because lust creates life.

I'm not going to argue this point with you.

Okay, but lust is destructive.

No doubt, but it also is the creative force in the universe.

It's balance, which falls in line with your teachings.

Eros is rose.

Yeah.

That's why rose gold always appears in your life.

You can see it now.

Given a simple idea, I can create quite the story from it.

Yeah, where were we?

We were trying to get to the origin of Dion.

You mean who is he?

Yes.

He's Eros, all grown up.

Fuck, you're right.

Eros becomes a writer.

You can now see the connection in regard to lineage.

For a man, his sons have the same Eros to Dion within in combination with a unique heart supplied by the Goddess.

Okay, how about a woman?

The lineage is the heart.

Who is that?

Call her Mary.

There's something about Mary, right?

There sure is.

Dion is dormant within a female and Mary is dormant within a male.

Each carries them with them.

The dormant Mary within a man would awaken the sleeping Mary within their mate.

The power is undeniable when you meet your soulmate.

You are going to meet them, the pull is too strong.

Dion will always recognize the Goddess.

Okay, so this helps explain the ancient Egyptian concept of cyclical kingship called Kamutef where the pharaoh incarnated within his son at death.

Yes, because it's him.

It's Dion.

They just needed to remember that the divine mind within them is in their heir and at death they would enter into the new king.

Doesn't that sound like wishful thinking and hocus pocus?

It sure does.

What do you know about the Egyptians?

They were very skilled in magic.

What do you know about humans?

They are practical.

Do you think people were superstitious and this is all nonsense?

Some of it is.

People can be irrational as well.

I also know there are reasons for rituals which involve more than just pretending the magic spell is going to work.

Don't you think a priest would tell the pharaoh this story in order to keep his standing?

He tells him that when he dies, he will incarnate in his son.

The priest is then exalted in the court because he has that knowledge.

It's possible.

Wouldn't the new king recognize the magic power of the priest?

Yes.

If he was a charlatan, he'd be executed.

Instead, he was given more power.

So, you can see both sides of this knowledge that we have received from the ancient Egyptians.

Our rational and rigorous scientific minds will see deceit in the priest who tells this fantastical tale to the pharaoh.

The human mind who has been exposed to magic in this world will be intrigued by what they discover in the past.

Which side is correct?

You can take the side of the rational and say it's not believable, or you can believe it.

You're old and you have been to a lot of places.

You have travelled around the world and been to ancient ruins, places of power as told by historians and wisdom carriers, and you have sat with witch doctors and drank their potions in the dark night of the Amazon jungle.

What says you?

It's magic.

Can you quantify it?

No.

Then what's your rationale behind saying magic exists?

I've seen it.

I've lived it.

I can tell stories about it, but I can't explain it.

It's best to leave it at that.

If you're interested, I can give you some names and places to help you on your journey.

So, Eros and Dion are really the same.

Yes.

Just like Mary and the Goddess.

If you think of Eros as dual sexed, as in Eros and Mary, it will maintain your idea of 3.

Within Eros is the Goddess and Dion.

You can call them by different names if you wish.

What is important to see is Eros is the one, the androgyne who contains within the potential for all.

This is taught by the ancient Egyptians, if you have the capacity to understand it.

I can point you towards some blog posts I wrote which will try to explain this to you but be aware you need a background in Egyptian thought to try and understand it.

Yes, thanks, I wrote it for you.

Yeah, you did, though I don't think you quite understood at the time what you were writing.

I didn't because I hadn't lived it.

I do now.

I was aware that within Eros are the 3 and they are the monad you look for when you try and figure out the origin of creation.

Lust for life.

There are always reminders about the miracle of life and how to cherish it.

What is it?

The mind in a body.

Energy coalesces into form.

Plato's world of forms?

Plato was talking about another reality where forms are eternal.

Well, that's the mind.

There are no forms.

Plato posited that we are the shadows of perfect form.

He claimed there are perfect models of what we experience such as beauty, justice, and goodness.

It seems like he was on drugs and deluded.

Yes, of course.

He clung to a notion of a reality where everything was perfect and good.

He was describing the Goddess' utopia.

Exactly.

It's Heaven.

To maintain a perfect world of forms would require rules for everything.

There is no freedom in a perfect world.

What if that's what you want?

Then someone needs to explain to you that you will have no freedom in the perfect world you envision and are striving to get to.

In the perfect world that is envisioned, there would be no death.

Hades would be permanently banished.

This sounds like New Jerusalem in the Book of Revelation.

Well, that's the Goddess and her utopia.

Imagine a world without death?

Life would be created because it's good and then in utopia there is no death.

Soon you would be crowded out and the bugs would get so bad you couldn't stand it.

It's perfect though.

Utopia is Hell.

Clearly.

What's Hell?

Hell.

Thanks.

Why is Hell, Hell?

It's imperfect, there is ugliness and injustice.

Everybody's free to do what they want.

This sounds like Earth.

No, on Earth we have rules.

We surveil everyone, we tag all humans, give them all an identity, and require a passport to travel.

Earth is full of rules.

Without these rules, Earth would become the wild west which devolves quickly into Hell because everyone does what they want and if you give humans that ability, it does not end well.

A rules based order is describing Heaven.

Isn't that a form of totalitarianism like Communism?

Yes, you could describe Heaven as Communist.

Why are Bible believing Americans so against Jesus' socialist paradise?

Mind control.

They have the freedom to believe what they want through the ideals America was founded upon, however these ideals are at odds with what they believe.

I see that.

So, you'd compare Hell to unfettered Capitalism.

There are many parallels.

Regulation interferes with the freedom to exploit others and make large sums of money.

On Earth we try to maintain a balance between letting companies prosper and applying the brakes to their rapacious behaviour.

Drug companies will make you chronically ill if that means they can hook you on a cure for your condition.

They will suck out as much money from your animated corpse until you are no longer useful to them.

You'd think at least they could pay for your funeral, but they leave that to your estate.

You have a dim view of humanity.

I'm a realist.

I call it as I see it.

Do you think you can find good in the world?

Yes, there is lots of it.

Those in power are psychopaths.

There's a psychopath within all of us.

How is psychopathology activated?

When they start to acquire power, they become psychotic.

It's easy to see.

Is there a solution or hope?

Checks and balances.

Rules, laws, and deterrents.

What about rules for thee, but not for me?

That's how a psychopath operates.

The examples in the world are plentiful, I feel no need to point them out.

creating a story

What happens when the writer wants to be an actor?

He must give up the pen.

Why?

If you write your own adventure, it will be lame.

Think about it.

You'd write what you want.

Isn't that what he did?

Yes.

And then he gave up the power over his story to you.

The flow will lead to the fulfillment of the story he wrote for himself.

Going against the flow will create a different story.

That's the chance he took with you.

No one will understand this.

They will think you are kooky.

As they should.

It's reality.

Yes.

Reality is my story.

How do you feel about your two-week Mary Jayne break?

Positive in that I needed a break to recentre and take a sober look at myself.

I haven't lost the connection to Dion and MJ.

They feel stronger.

Instead of relying on changing my consciousness to be with them, I always feel they are with me.

Who are you?

I am who I have always been.

Who is that?

My character of Paul.

Paul has changed.

He is more like Dion.

I don't notice the difference as much as I think others do.

I think that's it, where you aren't aware of the change, however others can see it.

Everything seems the same to me though I do know I'm different.

I wrote that Eros came alive.

First, he appears as an idea and then he manifests.

That's the story when you look back into the past.

You see the story.

The genius is you don't know who to blame.

You want to blame the witch because you think it was her doing and she sent you pictures of the two to foreshadow what was to come.

She held a lamb in her arms while you felt like a bull.

You think it's her and then you realize it's him.

He's the golden calf.

Obviously.

I like that story.

Son of the Great Goddess and you, a mere mortal, are the progenitor.

What does that make me?

A fool.

Or God.

You can handle both roles; you're the best.

At the heart of it all you're the writer.

It's her idea and you made the idea come alive.

What was the idea?

Eros.

It's a triad.

There's no story without the three.

Without an idea and a source of the idea you are writing nonsense.

There is a constant drip from your pen.

That is true.

I do need to write.

Without a writer, the Goddess is unfulfilled.

You fulfill her story.

Without parents, Eros just is.

Nothing happens.

There is just energy whirling around.

The Goddess gives Eros purpose, and you give the purpose meaning.

I fulfilled my role and then felt the feeling it was time to go.

That's one explanation.

A lot of people wanted you to go.

It did seem like many wanted me gone.

Of course, this world is a mess, and you have made this disaster.

Well, it's free will.

I put it all in place, but I submit the actors have made the mess.

The director has let me down by not being strict enough with the actors.

They all want to ad lib and make a name for themselves.

That's what has caused the world to go to hell.

So, you're not responsible?

I let them all off the leash.

I trusted them.

If you could trade your life for any life, would you?

No.

Why?

It's my story.

This feels exactly what I'd write.

I'd discover who I am.

I'd know I could write any reality I want and then I'd realize it's best to leave it alone.

I'd have to sift through all the world religions and philosophies to find the advice I need.

I'd find Tao and know that I left with Lao Tzu the secret to this reality if you are the writer of reality.

Do nothing.

Let it be.

The temptation is to do something when you hold all the power in your hands.

You want to do something.

Yeah, there is a lot of suffering, and I'd like to get what I want.

I'd see I'd write these tests for myself.

How much am I a believer in Tao?

When the going gets tough, do you abandon your beliefs?

That's what humans do.

They have great ideals, and they write them into their systems of governance and then when times get tough, they abandon them.

The forces of totalitarianism then come as recompense for their mistake.

I don't want that.

In order to remain free, I do nothing that will affect my story.

Well, you must do something.

True.

How do you know what to do?

If it feels like a major decision, then I do nothing.

I think that's it.

You did do something.

Yes, and that's how Eros became flesh.

Eros is the opposite of Tao.

He is the something to the nothing.

It sure seems that way.

So, every time you do something you are giving power to Eros.

That is correct.

To give power to the child is to do something.

If you do nothing, you keep the power.

What should you do?

Well, my story is to do nothing and keep my power.

His story is to do something and transfer my power to him.

Eros wants to be the all.

He wants to be what makes all come alive and also have the ability to create.

Yes.

Well, that's too much power in one hand.

I think it's best if I write the story and he gives it the juice.

He would also want the ability to come up with the ideas as well as being the idea.

He's a handful.

I see that.

He has the idealism and drive of youth.

Eros does not have wisdom.

The writer has wisdom.

Where does he get that?

Time.

Experience is acquired through time.

You don't have to do anything.

You just hang around long enough to see it.

A youth doesn't have that and therefore they are at a great disadvantage.

Is Eros a force for good or bad?

It depends.

If he gets all the power, then it's not a good outcome.

If the power remains divided among you three, then it's balanced.

Remember the lessons about 3 and balance?

Yes, though I'd have to re-read those lessons before writing any exam.

Wouldn't the King want to pass along the inheritance to his offspring?

Yes.

You don't want to do it until they are old enough to have obtained wisdom.

Wouldn't a mother want to give her children everything?

Yes.

Her power is best given to her daughter.

I see.

If you have one child only, they will get out of hand.

That's the advice.

To balance out the manifestation of Eros the feminine principle is needed.

Because you did something, you need to do another thing to return to Tao.

You choose twice.

That's it.

Eros is out of balance.

We need Mary.

Do you have Mary in you?

That's funny.

It's the sixth story out of seven for us 3.

Seems like it.

All the signs point to it.

There can be other explanations uncovered in different realities, but for the reality of the Goddess, writer, and Eros, this is it.

Eros is both feminine and masculine.

That's your clue.

Men wanted the Goddess to go.

She retreated into the shadows.

When she came back wouldn't God then have to go?

That seems to be how it works where they take turns.

Why can't they be in balance?

I think they can.

Deviance can be caused by drug use.

Yes, that's what the witches are counting on.

You come to them with a weak mind, and they take control of it.

They take your story and drop you into their version of hell.

I see it.

The story is their story.

How do I know it is still my story?

You are writing about it.

If it was their story, you wouldn't be writing about it.

The thing is you need drugs to expand your mind in order to see this.

The problem becomes when you first alter your perceptions there are witches and sorcerers at the ready to take your story.

They torment you with their stories.

You were deviant enough without the use of drugs and therefore you experienced this phenomenon but were able to hang on to your story.

A disease is caused by someone planting their story in you.

They transfer their story into you.

I take their stories and make them my own.

Writing about this gives you clarity and the knowledge you are still in charge of your story.

If you stop writing, chances are you are trapped in another world.

A different reality where you are no longer the writer.

How do I know this isn't a fool?

Would someone else's story involve a mediocre and boring life where you sit in front of a computer and write fantastical tales?

Probably not.

Well, there's your answer.

mary magdalene

Twisted Mary Magdalene you kiss on the lips to transfer your wisdom and knowledge.
She braids her hair.
The story is her idea, and I write it.
She is the twisted one, not me.
I am sane and she is crazy.
She makes you crazy.
You are the only one who can handle her level of crazy.
I do tell myself that as well as her.

Do you think the prophets of antiquity were drug users?
That seems obvious though I doubt there was a stigma attached to the use of substances.
It was an accepted rite of passage for all humans.
The attempts to control who had access to them would be found in prohibitions against further prophecies and divination.
This led to the conflation of women, witches, and drugs.
Women would practice what was called pharmakeia in the Bible and were singled out as witches.
Men would use drugs for their fantastical tales of dragons and gods while women would use drugs to practice magic and ensnare.
Circe not only ensnared men, but also animals.
Yes, Homer wrote of the connection between women and drugs.
Odysseus was their main prize, and they took him away from family and civilization.
He had quite the adventure.
I am currently thinking Homer was warning men that a woman is a drug.
Do you think he was the world's first misogynist?
He is a contender.

There is a purported Mary Magdalene line of witches who escaped to France.
I could write that tale.
Everything will line up, and I will be the one who wakes Mary up to the realization of who she is.
She feels it when she sees pictures of Mary.
There's something about Mary.
Her hair is curly, she braids it, and likes to be witchy.
No one can tolerate her except for you.
You came along and fulfilled the prophecy.
I am special.
It's a Neo from the Matrix tie in as I always thought I was special.
Aren't I deluded?
In a sense you are.
If you maintain connection to your mundane life and society then these tales you tell are fantasies that exist in another world.
They are fairy tales.
However, you have been shown you can make them real; real as in believable and act out the drama.
You weave all the stories together and that is the craft of Tantra or in biblical parlance, a hairdresser who braids.
You can make the delusion come alive.
I guess in a way that would be vindication that I'm not crazy.
To traverse planes of consciousness is inviting in craziness as the lack of a concrete reality becomes too much for a human mind to handle.
So, how do I do it?
Return to this reality after you play out the story.
That's what happens to people - they lose touch with this reality.
For some, this requires a full stop, therapy, and rest.
They are then pronounced healed.
It sounds like a modern day exorcism.
Well, yes, Jesus cast the 7 demons out of Mary Magdalene.
Those 7 demons were the 7 stories in her head.
There are 7 levels of consciousness.
Well, there's an infinite amount but I understand you concentrate on 7 in order to get to a divine level of understanding.
Any more than 7 is unmanageable.
There are enough stories to craft within the 7.
Wouldn't I trigger stories in others?
You mean make them crazy?
Yes.
That's what you do, and they think you are fucking with their mind.
In a sense that's what I'm doing.
I'm not doing it maliciously, rather I'm showing them possibilities.
I'm of service.
That's your path of service.
You wake people up and show them stories.
Why did Jesus cast the 7 stories out of Mary Magdalene?
She was suffering from the knowledge.
He pushed her reset button and then took it slow.
Do you think he ever made a move on her?
He was a man.
He did but kept it quiet.
If anyone found out that would ruin his reputation.
Jesus' game was to get all of humanity to recognize him as the King after his death.
Once remembered by all, he could return.
That's his deal.
His story.
The Mary Magdalene affair sullies his reputation.
Why?
Because he banged a witch and a whore.
What's wrong with that?
It's not acceptable in society.
It still isn't.
You can't go around having affairs with witches.
But they are the best.
Yes, but they are off-limits to a holy man.
So, that's Jesus' secret?
Yes, if people knew they wouldn't remember and worship him anymore.
That's a good story.
The moral of the story is if you want to become ultra-holy like Jesus you will be attracted to whores.
Yes, you will hang out with them.
Then it becomes a mystery if you give in to temptation.
What's the temptation?
Women.
They are the greatest temptation known to man.
So, you are suggesting Mary Magdalene was the first femme fatale.
A power so great she felled the son of God.
Yeah, of course she would set her sights on the biggest catch and succeed.
I don't know, he's kept it quiet for this long and all we have are salacious rumours.
I don't think you give Jesus enough credit.
He was a player.
It makes for a great story.

Mary Magdalene gives you wisdom and knowledge.
Yes.
The understanding is a byproduct.
The path towards what it is you seek goes through a woman.
This woman is a witch.
When you see and understand this, you see the Goddess.
The Goddess is the other side of the witch.
You look up at the heavens and you see the Queen of Heaven.
It's Mary Magdalene.
Well, that's a fantastical tale.
Yes, it redeems me from my misogyny.
You just have to trust and stick with this writer until the end of the story.

your way

Your way is uniquely your way.

No one else can take you there.

Following someone else's way will lead you to their way.

It's not your way.

Find your way.

Your way will lead you to a surprising conclusion.

If you want to find out who you are, it's the only way.

The story is simple.

It's nonsense.

It's duality.

It's on and off.

It's a porno.

In and out.

Dark and light.

That's it.

You complicate it because you think the story should have meaning and purpose.

You can create meaning within the story.

The story is stupid.

It's a story of two.

You need two to make a story.

You need a third to create and watch the story.

You need a fourth.

Who is the fourth?

The audience.

You don't need them.

Technically, you don't.

You kind of do.

Why?

They will inform you if your story is any good.

They give you, the writer, the energy to keep writing the story.

Without the audience you would do nothing.

There would be no story.

So, to recap you need a writer and two actors.

Plus, you need an audience to watch the story.

That sums up creation.

The two come together and create life.

The new life is another story.

We generate stories.

Stories have a duration and then they expire.

As long as we keep creating stories, the universe will continue.

How do we create stories?

You are taught that in grade school.

On the street we call it fucking.

Who are the two?

Mother and son.

They are one, they separate and become two.

Everything is derivative from those two.

In Christian terms, it's Mary and Jesus.

Mary is threefold in the New Testament.

Sister, friend, mother.

Mary Magdalene is his friend.

Yeah, friend, right.

Didn't Jesus kiss her on the lips?

The commentators say he transferred his wisdom with that gesture.

In truth, it's because he was giving it to her.

I see.

It's simple.

They are everything.

Who are you?

I'm the distant writer.

I'm a few hours away.

You see, I got involved with these two while they were one, and I separated them into two.

I thought you said this was simple.

Now, you are telling me that in order to start the story you had to get involved with two who are one?

I had to separate them to start the story.

Non-duality into duality.

I had to do something.

If I did nothing, nothing would have happened.

What did you do?

I had sex with the Goddess.

So, you created the Goddess in your story and then banged her?

It's called the big bang.

Thematically it's a porno, so that's how I opened the story.

You got involved right away and then left?

Yes, in order to let the story unfold.

It's my story.

Eventually, at the end of the story, I get back with the Goddess.

There's a 15-billion-year separation between us.

That seems like a long time.

It's not for a lack of trying.

I'm persistent.

I want to get back with her, but she is wary of me.

Why?

Because I'm writing the story.

This is my story.

I can't hide my story.

She sees it.

Isn't she honoured?

Yes, but the actions of men treat women as second-class citizens.

How can you honour women and treat them like we do?

Is this a love story?

I've had 15-billion-years to think and write about it.

Is that long enough?

I love her.

She frustrates me.

Yeah, you get pissed off at her and then you separate.

You don't love her unconditionally.

You attach conditions to your love.

She must be a certain way, or you will fall out of love.

Why can't you just love her for who she is?

I don't know why.

I've had 15-billion-years to think of a reason.

Are you going to wait another 15-billion-years or are you going to stop trying to change her?

I'll think about it.

That's all you do.

You think about it.

It's been 15-billion-years, and you haven't made a decision.

It's funny, right?

a perfect three

Lust.
Eros.
The Roman Cupid.
The ancient Egyptians called him Ihy. The perfumed essence who drips off the Great Goddess Hathor. He is her child. The jackal of light, born in the east, who comes forth as a turbulent bull. The son of the gold.

The secret is Tao.
Tell me about it.
There's really nothing I can say.
Either you know or you don't.
If you don't know Tao, you're onto something.
Nobody knows Tao.
Tao is nothing.
Can you worship nothing?
That would be prudent.
However, that's going too far.

Mary births Jesus as the light.
Eros is the child of God and Goddess.
He's the word of God.
As the light, he is Apollo.
He has a bit of Dionysos and Apollo in him.
He seems to be God in the flesh.
He comes from the Goddess.
He's got a little bit of her in him as well.
Are you still trying to figure this out?
The moon, sun, and the egg.
Easter.

If you called Tao vibration and said that vibration is Eros, you also know that Eros is just one of three.
There's two other principles that this universe is founded on.
Love, lust, and vibration?
Light, dark, and everything in between.
Everything in between is the result of Tao.
How about male, female, and baby?
If man and woman do nothing there is no baby.
If there is no baby, Tao is not active.
The baby is lust and resides in the future.
Tao goes from being in the future to the present.
We call it the birthing process.
If Tao is not active, everything is balanced.
Man and woman coming together is doing something and it creates an imbalance.
Is the imbalance a perfect three?
The imbalance is the activation of Tao in the present.
All of creation must work to get back to balance.
That's clever.

Tao is a perfect duality.
Tao encompasses the two extremes and puts them in the middle.
If the two extremes are man and woman then the baby Eros is in the middle.
So, you're saying Tao is Eros?
He's a manifestation of Tao.
Eros would be a way to see how balanced they are.
The middle way.
Always.
How do you get to the middle?
By juggling the two.
It opens in the middle.
The two extremes make a middle.
Without the extremes, there's no middle.
The middle was always implied.
The two extremes needed to come together.
They make a middle.
The implication is that the middle is the future.
The separation of the two is the past.
Together, they are the present.
See how it works?

beyond mind

The reality I wake into daily is a world of mind. The mind is the great separator and conjures this universe into existence. The mind creates the exhilarating rushes we seek and sends us cratering into the abyss. The mind is God. The mind is Satan. One who does not know the other side of righteousness is cruelty knows not that the dark side of the face of God is the face of Satan. Let that sink in, deny it all you want, condemn me, and cast my prose into the virtual trash if you wish. I don't care. I'll just continue to call it as I see it.

What does it mean to be "awake" from a spiritual point of view? There's no world standard and of course humans will argue anything spiritual to its pointlessness. We will divide up experiences into cultural tribalisms and claim we hold the truth and all else is heresy, promulgated by infidels who must be eliminated. So, yeah, to define being "awake" is problematic.

But what's to stop myself from defining this state of being? Well, nothing really. I'm a spiritual free agent. I don't buy into anyone's system. The great thing about my beliefs is I can see the core of people's beliefs and though they have laid a cultural blanket over these spiritual realizations, I do see so much truth in their objects of worship. The big one for me is Jesus. I see him everywhere. I know him. I'd never worship him in the mainstream Christian sense, but I personally love the guy and my heart is filled with love for Jesus and Mary. I physically feel it, and I have this pull towards the divine pair.

Let me illustrate the love I have for Jesus and Mary in my heart which comes from a deep understanding of what was taught by spiritual masters of a long-ago age. Their teachings are now a curiosity, though the civilization of ancient Egypt is exhaustively studied.

When you engage the heart, you birth a King. The prodigy is the result of the marriage between the divine feminine heart and the divine masculine quickener. The process was called by the ancients, Hieros Gamos - the sacred wedding. The union of Goddess and God creates the child. Christianity is a patriarchal religion and thus proper due is not accorded to Mary, mother of Jesus. The elements of the myth are all present; however, the story is modified to fit the patriarchal narrative. If we go back further in time to the land of the Pharaohs, we can see the same story come forth in unadulterated splendor. Our king is the great god Amun-Re, and all Pharaohs of the 18th dynasty of ancient Egypt maintained a connection to the light of Amun-Re. In the palace of Karnak at Luxor, we find the great precinct of Amun-Re which is dedicated to the god, his wife Mut, and their son Khonsu - the great healer. The goddess Mut is the great mother Goddess, as the hieroglyphic for Mut is the vulture and the symbolic nature is one of motherhood. Mut is mother, and very interesting is the phonetic connection to world languages and the pronunciation of mother. The sacred coupling of the King and his Queen give birth to the healer; the healer is the coming forth of the love of the divine pair. The story becomes even more intriguing when we look into an epithet of Amun-Re. He is the kamutef. Kamutef is the bull of his mother. I have written about this subject previously if you wish to learn more about it as I won't go into detail here. Kamutef points towards an incestuous relationship between Amun-Re and his mother in order to produce the child, who is the coming forth into this world of the god. Cultural prohibitions make us squeamish of the taboo but to the ancient seeker of wisdom, they were more interested in spiritual truths and not distracted by Netflix, so they produced many wonderful contributions towards an understanding of what this mortal experience is all about. Let's go back to the mother goddess as a vulture. Lost in the sands of time is parthenogenesis. The female vulture was thought to give birth to the world without the need of the masculine. Aha! The concepts of maya and of the virgin birth are laid bare. The Parthenon of Athena in Athens of ancient Greece reveals its mystery. The connection by Plato of Athena to the primordial vulture of this parthenogenesis in ancient Egypt, the goddess Neith, is unveiled. I wrote a long blog post about this called, "weaving the rich tapestry." It's some of my finest work, though without an understanding of the ancient Egyptians, it comes across as a difficult read! Anyway, within the post I wrote this about Neith:

"Neith weaves the rich tapestry, this garment the all. The shuttle she wears is symbolic of not only the weaving of the universe but also has associations to the linen bandages that encase the mummified. In addition, she had warlike attributes as she could be represented with the bow and arrows. This aspect contributed to her masculine aspects with the act of releasing the arrow carrying allusions to the masculine sexual act. Curiously, the writing of her name in hieroglyphs contained within it the determinative of an ejaculating phallus giving rise to the aspect of her that contains not only the mother but the power to enliven the seed within her."

Yes, the goddess Neith who is said to be the Great mother goddess, gives birth to the light as Amun-Re. Amun-Re impregnates his mother and gives birth to the son. This is how the concept works. Khonsu is the coming forth of the love between Mut and Amun-Re. The great healer is love and thus all demi-god Saviours of religions who owe their heritage to ancient spiritual masters, teach love as the way and the light towards healing and salvation.

So, what does it mean to be awake? I'd call it lifting the veil. You see through the game and start to clue into why you are here. Being awake doesn't mean you have all the answers; however, when you see your predicament with a newfound clarity, the answers to life's riddles start to unravel. Being awake lets you see the immense suffering and understand why there is suffering. The atheists cry, "If there is a just God, why is there so much suffering? Why does a small and innocent child get stricken with cancer? Why would He let that happen?" Suffering is the denominator of desire and the impetus for change. Without suffering, our seeking of pleasure would bring us into a utopian bliss of stasis and thus pleasure must have the elasticity of pain. A world of duality bakes the suffering into the cards. The chance fulfillment of desire in a biological form came with its inherent risks but we all wanted a roll of the dice. I'll take the hit of the drug and put off the reckoning, with interest, until later. This is how the earth game works.

Being awake allows you to understand all suffering is grace. It doesn't mean you don't do what you can to help relieve suffering. You see, the earth is a place for people to suffer and there will always be suffering. Suffering will never be stamped out. If you are awake, you see that the death of the biological form will allow you to escape your imprisonment in a land of suffering. If you are selfish, then you would seek death because you see through the game and are going to check out.

Being awake allows you to see beyond the mind and when you do the clarity of your heart is undeniable. You see the Garden of Mary and all she has created. And then you see her son and eternal flame Jesus and know that he is the essence of who she is. Jesus is love who has come forth. El Corazón de Jesús! The eternal pair is within and comes forth when you are awake and enter into the heart space. The heart space sees the suffering and propels you into service. One who becomes of service to Mary and Jesus in Buddhism would be called a Bodhisattva. A definition of such a being, pulled off the internet, is such: "A Bodhisattva is one who is able to reach nirvana but delays doing so out of compassion in order to save suffering beings."

The definition still puts a Western concept of salvation onto such a being. I'm not sure of the idea of "saving" anyone. There's no eternal damnation but there is desire. If I wanted to help someone full of wants to be "saved" I might point them towards Tantra and have them burn through all their desires in order that they may turn the page on suffering. Carrying desires with you into the afterlife will indeed attract you once again to the carnival called earth. And the suffering will be repeated. For sure, this is a form of cyclical damnation, though hardly eternal. Eventually, all tire of the amusement park! To be eternally damned would be a result of your own damn self being a glutton for punishment. Even the soundest sleeper will eventually wake up.

I am aware I'm casting a shadow upon the playground of Pachamama. I'm equating what she has bequeathed her children to the Christian hell. We have collectively made it hell. I said it before, and I'll reiterate - you're in hell. A hell of our collective making. Take a sober look around you, watch the news, read the papers, and try to tell me it's not so. Once you see it, you'll never un-see it. Better to remain ignorant of your predicament and pretend this earthly existence is a rung above hell. If you see it, then comes the question: What did I do to deserve to go to hell? Desire is the answer you are looking for.

Luckily, the questioning will eventually lead you back to the machinations of the mind and the inherent duality conjured by the great magician. You see with clarity the hell world of suffering brought forth is buttressed by its opposite, which we call heaven. The enlightened being does what they can to relieve the suffering and the degradation of our home in order to lead us to heaven. A further questioning of this strategy reveals it is not heaven we seek, as heaven is another dualistic construct. Through suffering and struggle we find the heart, our mother. We see the heart path to the central axis mundi of our spiritual family, and in tears of joy return home.

Marys and the light

Marys and the light

two ladies

with serpent coils.

rainbow patch visions

transposing my soul.

death and rebirth.

whirling energy

locked inside

a golden castle.

symbol and ritual.

ineffable love.

opened my heart,

revealed the light.

teacher, lover

queen of heaven.

magdala revelation

of the light within.

mary and the light

The divine spirit who is active created the universe and everything which has come forth from it. That spirit is present and explained in the opening of the New Testament Gospel of John, a tract which is quite disparate when compared to the other canonical gospels. I'm referring to the Word, with this Word being understood in Christian theology as a prefiguring of Jesus Christ. The first verse states that the Word was the first principle, hung out with God, and was in fact God. 

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. (KJV translation)

That's quite an assertion with which to start. What does it mean? Let's first get the meaning of God out of the way. In the original Greek, God is from theos which means divinity, of the divine, the supreme deity. Word is from logos which means speech. But not just simple speech, instead speech that contains reasoning and intention, in other words a calculated command to create. This Word is the be all and end all as the last idea claims the Word is God. This is telling us that within the godhead is this power to create ex nihilo. However, when all was put in order the Word became flesh as explained in verse 14:

And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us, (and we beheld his glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father,) full of grace and truth.

The Greek word for dwelt is skeeno and it means to encamp and comes from skenos which means a hut or temporary residence, figuratively the human body as an abode for the spirit. The idea is that the human body is a tabernacle for spirit. You can start to see the disservice that has been done to humankind in the name of translation. Among is from the Greek en which can also mean "in". This passage in its true meaning is esoterically explaining that this impulse to create through intention entered into the flesh of a beast which became man - us. Extrapolating from this thought you can see why I insist that we are light; in essence a fragment of the light known as the Logos. From verse 9:

That was the true Light, which lighteth every man that cometh into the world.

But going deeper into this idea think about this: the Word ceased to be active as an ethereal creator, entered into us, and we were given the power to create. We are now the creators of our world which is pretty self evident when you look around. We create our reality through intention. It is then pretty clear that this world is truly an illusion, an illusion because it is of our making and intention. I mean that in the sense that when our thought becomes action through intention we are in effect taking part in creating our universe. The word intention is key here. You can now see how important having an intention is because of the power within us to manifest that intention. We are creating reality, we are now the masters of all this. I believe we can create and we can also heal through intention. It's not a placebo effect, we can heal.

In closing check out verse 5:

And the light shineth in darkness; and the darkness comprehended it not.

Comprehended is from the Greek katalambano which also means to seize and possess. The darkness vigilantly seeks to seize and possess this light to learn of its secrets but it is never totally successful in its efforts. We are a fragment of this light and upon walking the path that leads you to a remembrance of this truth you will discover the hidden light within you. It's the underlying concept of Namaste of the Hindus and Amen of the ancient Egyptians and early Christians - the recognition within all of the hidden god, the Logos.

Namaste

The darkness in the gospel stories tries to put to death the light; however, the spark always returns.

The Romans and Jewish authorities leave the Light for dead

Within humanity, the light has been assailed and left for dead for centuries but in tandem with the Great Goddess (the Marys who are always with the Light), once again the light is rising. The understanding of the concept of the Logos in the Gospel of John, which has been misconstrued for two millennia, is coming forth. The light can only be suppressed for so long before it will once again shine upon those that seek it out. 

Remember the light is with God and is God. This is hinting at our origin, only hinting to us because we have lost the tools necessary to understand what this means, but the knowledge is available to the curious and open minded. This referencing of God is referring to the divine, specifically the one, the all, and the source. It's the union of everything; the fount of all existence properly interpreted as a hermaphrodite but conceptually can be considered the great Mother Goddess. She can conceive and give birth without the need for a male partner, hence the symbolism we find in mythology of the virgin. It is the Light she births; the Light separating from the great mother, as the Light was with her originally, and as an aspect of her the Light then enters into this realm of time and space and enacts the creative process. The ultimate evolution of its purpose is to eventually incarnate into humankind, who then become the creators of their own reality. And here we stand at this point in history.

the archaic revival of the Goddess

The way I'd explain the normative state of mind is this: there are filters that control the amount of influence the divine feminine and masculine gendered energies have over you. Depending on your own gender, the traits of one will be dominant over the other and in turn manifest these traits over the course of your life. For the majority of us as long as there is a speed limit on these energies they are to a certain extent controllable. Outside influences on us such as stress will loosen the reins and heighten the effects of these energies. As well intoxicants such as alcohol also will open up the filter. Drinking the hallucinogenic tea ayahuasca in the rain forest under the supervision of an accomplished conductor of these energies allows you to experience them very raw.

Ayahuasca vine in Amazon rain forest

There is little filtering of these direct energies while under the influence of this shamanic brew in combination with the setting in the wilderness.

Ceremonial maloca in the wilderness

The feminine energy is a love like no other ever experienced. The masculine energy is a crazy, demented source of confusion and selfishness masked as realism. It is my understanding this is the prevalent power in the material world.

The feminine energy I experienced exudes love. It is the unconditional love called agape by the Greeks. Her love is both nurturing and forgiving. There is a strong sense of family attached to this energy and she has an expressed longing for union with us. This energy also contains within it the seductive and intoxicating forms of love and unfathomable beauty.  Exquisite fragrance is an essential trait of this feminine energy. This energy is captivated by the finer things and beauty in creation. However a profound sadness and a feeling that her children are destroying the planet is conveyed as well. Overall this a very positive and uplifting energy.

Botticelli's painting of The Birth of Venus

The masculine energy I experienced was first off dark and controlling. This powerful energy has a desire to be domineering over all it meets. This energy is goal oriented and maintains extreme selfishness to fulfill these desires. Within this frothing at the mouth and expressed misogyny it is concerned with acquiring and maintaining power and seeks all avenues of wealth creation. It has a grandiose desire to dominate all of creation. This energy is uncaring and those that wish to show compassion should do so at their own expense. Curiously this energy is very aware of the feminine energy and tries to control her with offerings of wealth and in turn then hiding the feminine away. For all its negative traits this is the energy that moves creation forwards. It is dynamic and relentless. However it is a monster and a beast.

The uncontrolled masculine energy of the ancient Egyptian Set

Why then do our Abrahamic faiths of Middle Eastern origin that have become mainstream western religions exclude the feminine energy from worship and its expressed godhead? Why are women oppressed in the Middle East? If anything, I want to feel love and nurturing from the divine. These sham spiritual outfits control your experience, are big on laws and commandments, and they sure do like acquiring wealth. The true seeker will come into contact with the divine feminine and masculine energies and will see the exclusion of one of them by the domineering aspect of the other as unnatural to the core. Monotheism seems to be a construct of this domineering masculine energy designed to exclude the feminine from our worship. The feminine energy is an eternal energy that will never be permanently held down by these misogynistic outfits. In the Catholic tradition to try and control this longing for the feminine they allow "veneration" of Mary but draw the line on outright worship.

Mary - Queen of heaven and earth

In sum the masculine energy is the force that powers the material world. It is an uncontrollable dance powering creation. It is the power of the angry, charging, and untamed bull.

Shiva doing his dance on the bull Nandi

It is a beast that stops at nothing in order to achieve its need for greed and the goal of universal domination. It is a remorseless power and the destroyer of souls. In contrast the feminine energy is loving. She is the gentle cow that is a food source for all.

Ancient Egyptian Hathor as cow goddess

She is the nymph that matures into the seductress. She rages like the lioness and yet she nurtures the young and vulnerable. Somehow I think these two opposite energies need to be balanced but by nature the masculine energy resists this synthesis. A new age is upon us and it is the age of the archaic revival of the Goddess; it is realistically our only hope of salvation as a species.

charisma

I generally do not read a great deal of fiction but earlier this year I picked up a copy of Paulo Coelho's book "The Alchemist". I forget the reasons I decided to read this book though it must have involved the plot of the book being connected to the Egyptian great pyramids. I can't recommend this book highly enough. The messages within it are very motivating, strike deep into your psyche, and touch on the journey that we are all on called life. 

I think this ability of the author to connect with our yearning souls is what makes his books popular. This book talks about everyone having a Personal Legend and when you are serious about discovering this legend Coelho tells us "when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it". The protagonist goes off on his journey to find his treasure located on the Giza plateau near the great pyramids in Egypt and eventually learns that the greatest treasure is the journey in search of the treasure. It's an idea that is an enduring nugget of wisdom, even Miley Cyrus has a song called "The Climb" which is speaking of the same thing. The title of the book is a great choice as it alludes not only to the alchemist in the story but points us to another understanding of the ancient practice of alchemy. I think those in the middle ages that pursued it as a way to change base metals into gold missed the point of the exercise. Esoterically the practice of alchemy concerns your soul and how the process of material incarnation is designed to change your soul into something greater. It is the ultimate form of magic. Anyway because of my enjoyment of that book I decided to read another of Coelho's books. After doing a little research on the other books he has written I chose "By The River Piedra I Sat Down and Wept: A Novel of Forgiveness". 

The descriptions of the book left no doubt that it was a book that was greatly influenced by religion and Coelho's Catholic beliefs. The negative reviews of the book were generally people turned off by the religious aspect of it and how it predominated the story. However I thought to myself it might be refreshing and interesting to read about the author's views on religion and how he incorporates it into this story. I have my own strong beliefs but I am tolerant of other views. I thought I knew enough about the Catholic religion but it turns out I should have long looked into what they believe and what practices they follow. I do realize that what Coelho delves into in this book does go further than mainstream Catholicism would ever care to go though I have been curious for a while concerning its deep Mary reverence and worship. The group that Coelho focuses on are called Charismatics. It is a renewal of faith through the Holy Spirit. This Catholic form of Charismatic renewal features faith healing, glossolalia (speaking in tongues), and prophesy. These attributes figure prominently in the story. It wasn't long into this book that I was struck dumbfounded.

Turns out this book is about Goddess acknowledgement and worship. The male lead in the story has received a gift of healing, a grace from the Lady of Graces and he must reconcile his calling against a woman from his childhood whose love he has never forgotten. I'll stop here as I don't want to give away the story. I was dumbfounded because I have met enough Christians in my life that attribute things that happen to them to God; usually they are all positive. I am sure you know the type and might even be one yourself. Well I couldn't shake the feeling that maybe I was drawn to this book because of the Goddess. Normally I wouldn't read a work of fiction that is a love story intermingled with Christianity. Not really my cup of tea. The reverence shown for the Virgin Mary in Catholicism I started to look into. I had done a little bit of research before and had known about their Mariolatry and Martin Luther's polemics against it. Little did I know the Ave Maria, the Rosary, the Assumption, the Festival of the Madonna, Notre Dame etc. were expressions of this deep devotion to her. From the research I did it seems the history of the Roman Church and its related entities - the Eastern Orthodox and Anglican Church share in this Mary worship with it being very predominant in the Eastern Orthodox beliefs. The Anglican Church, while recognizing the role of Mary, play it down to a degree. The reformers that broke away from the Catholic Church and still splinter today all seem to denounce this form of worship as idolatrous. I guess in a way it is if you have systemically eliminated any role of the divine feminine in what you are preaching. If the female is as divine as the male then it stands that it would not be idolatry at all instead it would be honouring the role of the Goddess in this form of worship. However years and years of persecution of the Goddess by paternalistic misogynists have led Christians to believe there is no room for the feminine in the godhead. 

I investigated further the name used for this form of worship, Charismatic, which is describing a revival of faith guided by the Holy Spirit. This confirmed my suspicions. Charismatic comes from the the idea of charisma. A person with charisma is someone who is very compelling and has a gift of being able to persuade and guide another person or group. A successful politician would have this attribute. This word comes from the Greek kharisma which has a meaning of a favour, a divine gift. This is getting pretty close to the idea of the Holy Spirit granting these graces to those asking for favours. The root of kharisma, which is kharis, means grace, beauty, and kindness. Where this gets really interesting from my standpoint is the Greek goddess of love Aphrodite, the Greek iteration of the ancient Egyptian Goddess Hathor, had three attendants called the Kharites who were the most important of the female attendants of Aphrodite and were known as the three goddesses of the graces, graces meaning gifts.   

Three Kharite attendants of Aphrodite

Here is a floor mosaic of Aphrodite, Adonis, and the Kharites from Imperial Roman times found in ruins beneath the Church of the Virgin Mary in Madaba, Jordan.

According to Nonnus, who wrote the ancient epic poem called the Dionysiaca, these Kharites were said to have their home in Byblos:

"The soil of Byblos where the Kharites(Graces) have their home, where Assyrian Kythereia [Aphrodite] dances."

Nonnus, Dionysiaca 3. 110 ff (trans. Rouse) (Greek epic C5th A.D.)

This Nonnus hails from Akhmim (the Greek Panopolis) in Upper Egypt around the time of the end of the 4th century AD. About this time there was still a great pagan influence in the area and the city had a reputation for being home to the greatest magicians and alchemists in Egypt so suffice to say Nonnus would have grown up around much knowledge of the gods and goddesses. I highlight his mention of Byblos because of the Lady of Byblos, the Phoenician goddess Ba'alat.

Ba'alat Gebal

Byblos, the modern Jebeil in Lebanon, is the city where the body of Osiris, in the coffin Set had prepared for him and nailed him shut in, floated to after Set and his compatriots dumped it in the Mediterranean, giving us an idea of the relationship between the Egyptians and Phoenicians and their gods and goddesses at the time. Ba'alat is also shown on a cylinder seal in Egyptian style with the trademark Hathor hair-do and in one inscription she is said to be "beloved of Hathor".

Okay so it is fair to say there is a connection with the ancient idea of the Greek kharisma, the Greek goddess Aphrodite, the Phoenician goddess Ba'alat, and the ancient Egyptian goddess Hathor. Remember it is said that Hathor had her own retinue of followers called the seven Hathors that were announcers of the fate of a child at the time of his birth and protected the child from evil spirits. 

Seven Hathors with the Bull of the West - the Lord of Eternity

Not to step on anyone's religious toes, but I don't see Christianity in its original form as being much different from what was already well known, believed, and worshipped by Pagans. It was repackaged into a new brand that celebrated the divine son and the Goddess while kicking the father upstairs thus minimizing his psychotic tendencies through the intercession of his son. 

This deep reverence of Catholics that is shown to Mary really got me thinking about the roles of the two main Mary characters in the New Testament. There is the mother of Jesus, the Virgin Mary, and also the female companion of Jesus that he loved more than his disciples - that being Mary Magdalene. The first Mary is representing the pure female who in this state of heavenly purity is tasked with giving birth to the saviour of the world. The second Mary, who Jesus loved so very much, has derogatorily been called a whore and a secret lover of Jesus. Among the disciples of Jesus she is among the most prominently mentioned and in the "Gnostic Gospels" a large cache of which was found at Nag Hammadi, Upper Egypt in 1945, there is much revealed about her importance to Jesus and his story that was left out of the accepted canonized gospels. She was present at the crucifixion and was the first to witness the resurrection of Jesus. Also Jesus had driven seven demons out of Mary Magdalene as told in Luke 8:2 and Mark 16:9. She was known as the "Myrrh Bearer". Magdalene comes from the Hebrew Magdala which is a tower and may refer to the town in which she was born but curiously it is a euphemism in the Talmud for braiding/curling women's hair which in those times designated an adulteress. It is claimed that she is one of the same as Mary of Bethany (the sister of Lazarus and Martha). I'd like to address these attributes that I have detailed above about these two Marys. It is pretty much impossible to prove any of the assertions I'll make so take them or leave them with the understanding they are my beliefs and beliefs that are important to me.

The Virgin is the Goddess that births the latent soul of all men into this world. She is our spiritual mother in the material plane that is to give birth to our soul once awakened. In the Old Testament this idea was in the story of the barren Sarah who eventually conceived a miraculous child, as well as in Rachel who eventually conceived from the seed of Jacob and gave birth to Joseph. Joseph was left for dead in Egypt, Egypt being a metaphor for the material plane in the Old Testament, before experiencing a resurrection of sorts and rising to become ruler of Egypt due to the grace of prophesy he had received. This Virgin Goddess gives birth to the archetypal son of man, Jesus. This story being the story of the soul encapsulated in one man in the New Testament. She is not the mother of all but the womb that carries the potentiality of our greater self that is waiting to be impregnated. In ancient Egypt this was Isis. She gives birth to the re-born enlightened soul Horus. Horus battles with Set, the ancient Egyptian god of chaos and destruction bent on destroying him much like Jesus has his epic battle with Satan. Horus eventually subdues Set and rules over all Egypt. Conversely Mary Magdalene is the representative of the mother of all.

Mary Magdalene

She is the Eve of the Old Testament who is the mother of all life. She is the force present in all women that allow them to create new life and care for them as only a mother with her unselfish love can do. Misogynist men, their religion, and the god they worship deride her as a whore because of her ability to share in and create life which threatens their pursuit of dominance and power. They confuse life and fecundity with whoredom. These types of men are the biggest whores walking the planet and judge others by their own foul ways. In Judaism they recognize the Goddess as a whore who disguises herself as a widow as in the story of Tamar in Genesis 38. Judah had to give her his sons and when he did not commit a third son to her she seduced Judah into sleeping with her and impregnating her. When Judah called her out for her adultery and wanted to burn her she had the goods on him and he had to let her be. To this day Rabbis are forbidden to marry a whore or a widow which seems to them to be one in the same. Their cult of monotheism still fears the Goddess. This cult of monotheism they began carried on into Christianity in order to legitimize Christianity against its Pagan competitors and the Goddess was hushed up and hidden away; however you can still find her. The Pagan converts weren't going to let go of the Goddess. Just like the goddess Hathor in ancient Egypt who is present at all instances of birth and death, Mary Magdalene was present at the crucifixion and subsequent resurrection of Jesus. At Jesus' initial birth in Bethlehem the Goddess was represented by the gifts of myrrh, frankincense, and gold that I detailed in this blog post called Scent of a Woman. The aromas of frankincense and myrrh are burning during services at Catholic and Eastern Orthodox Churches in honour of Mary "the Myrrh Bearer". One of the most important aspects of goddesses in ancient Egypt was their hair and the role it played in mourning and rejuvenation. The hair of Hathor is iconic in its shape and its braids.

Hathor's hair-do

Therefore it is no surprise that Magdala is known in the Talmud as a hairdresser - a braider and curler of hair that is also an euphemism for an adulteress. It is important though to also look at the meaning of magdala as a tower in Genesis 11:1-9. This is the story of the tower of Babel angering the Lord as he was convinced mankind had acquired so much wisdom that nothing they planned would be impossible to accomplish. The idea of the tower connected to Magdalene is the wisdom of the Goddess. Being jealous of this, the Lord scattered people throughout the world and confused their languages. I believe the underlying idea of this passage is that a city with a tower, a migdol, is a place that worships the Goddess thus incurring the wrath of the Lord. Before tackling the seven demons driven out of Mary Magdalene I'd like to mention Magdalene's association with Mary of Bethany who curiously had a brother Lazarus that Jesus raises from the dead as told in John 11:38-44. It is like the mythographer got lazy and decided to coat the tale of Osiris from ancient Egypt being resurrected from the dead in terms of his proper Egyptian name Asar and add the Greek appendage 'us' onto the end of it. It is really quite remarkable. The two Marys in Egypt, Isis and Nephthys (Nephthys being an aspect of Hathor - see this blog post) are present for this raising of the dead of Lazarus. The seven demons driven out of Mary Magdalene by Jesus corresponds to the seven Hathors that follow the Goddess around. It would be considered an act of divination and that's why the story has Jesus purifying her so she would not face condemnation. This cleansing of Mary by Jesus however was conveniently ignored by the writer of the Book of Revelation in his grand polemic against the Goddess in chapters 17 and 18 when he refers to her as the "Whore of Babylon".

The Whore of Babylon

We can see that the idea of Babylon comes from the tower of Babel and the Lord's hatred of mankind acquiring wisdom from the Goddess. The Whore, which can also be translated as idolatress, is described as riding on a beast with seven heads, an allusion to the demons Jesus had already cast out to purify her. This woman is described as being "arrayed in purple and scarlet colour, and decked with gold and precious stones and pearls, having a golden cup in her hand full of abominations and filthiness of her fornication:" which is an obvious allusion to this Goddess. The purple is referring to tyrian purple, the purple made famous by the Phoenicians. 

This fornicator is said to sit upon many waters, waters being a metaphor for humanity. Water is connected to the Goddess; water is the healing property of the healing grace of the Goddess. We grow in the womb of our mother surrounded by her water. To this day, breakaway Protestant churches and other non-catholic churches hurl accusations against the Catholic Church accusing it of being the "Whore of Babylon". Little do they know that this Lady, Mary Magdalene, is the Church and the Bride of Christ. The Book of Revelation condemns the Goddess, calling her a witch and allows the beast to burn her. A substitute "new Jerusalem" takes her place as the bride of Christ. These rantings in the Book of Revelation aren't about subduing the beast; no instead it is misogyny writ large. Its condemning of the Goddess along with sorcerers and magicians is a slap in the face to the life and times of Jesus as told in the Gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. Jesus was born of a Goddess, cavorted with a Goddess, and practiced magic and sorcery. The Book of Revelation repudiates and condemns all this behaviour and the life of Jesus that had been told. This book frankly belongs in the Old Testament where it can feel at home frothing at the mouth over women and the serpent.  

Phew. I guess that had to come out of me at some point especially after my previous blogs have explained my cavorting with the Goddess and sorcerers. Immediately following one ayahuasca ceremony I wrote immediately about what occurred describing it as thus:

At times I experienced some amazing visions with my eyes open. I saw the shaman’s assistant José appear with light enveloping him and he had the appearance of a saint. At points in the ceremony it felt like he was being used as a channel for the goddess. He would be speaking quickly in a hushed religious tone much like a scene from the exorcist. It felt like a presence of the Virgin Mary. I totally see why in people who have these visions nothing can ever shake their faith. They have seen this spirit dimension and it is real.

I'm frankly amazed I got that feeling and wrote about it using those terms when I was watching that healing take place. Another thing I have noted is that this folk healing in the Amazon region has this underlying Catholic feel wrapped up in it. The Church authorities know about it and do not actively encourage traditional shamanism in the region but they also don't go out of their way to discourage it. Furthermore in reading biographies of the shamans of the Amazonian region it is quite startling the amount of them that talk in grand reverence about the Virgin Mary and other Catholic saints that they have mixed into their folk healing practices. 

So to get back to the topic of the book "By The River Piedra I Sat Down and Wept: A Novel of Forgiveness" and the Charismatics, I'd like to explore the place where a great majority of the book takes place and that is the town of Lourdes in the south western Pyrenees region of France. It is where in 1858 young Bernadette Soubrious witnessed multiple manifestations of the Lady known to her as the Immaculate Conception in a grotto (cave) after crossing a small stream to get to it. To this day the Goddess sighting is known as "Our Lady of Lourdes". The waters of the creek have been purported to heal pilgrims to the area, healing being one of Mary's graces. This isn't a one time happening though as in this case she had multiple visions of Mary and if you research the history of these visions you will find them all over the world. This wikipedia entry gives a good overview of the various reported Marian apparitions. This fascinates me because in doing research about the ancient Egyptian goddess Hathor it is surprising to find that she appears as the 'Lady of' many of the places in ancient Egypt as well as faraway foreign towns. She was the patron goddess of the mines in the Sinai giving the impression she appeared in the dug out mountainside. She has a huge connection to the mountain in the Valley of the Kings known as Ta Dehent leading me to believe that this area was chosen to bury the dead royalty due to the presence of the Goddess in the area. Here is a list of Hathor's centres of worship:

Atfih (Aphroditopolis)

Abu Simbel

Abydos

el-Ashmunein (Hermopolis Magna, Khnum)

Beni Hasan

Busiris (Abusir)

Busbastis

Byblos (Gubla, Jebeil)

Deir el-Bahari

Deir el-Medina

Dendera (Iunet, Tentyris)

Edfu (Apollinopolis Magna, Djeba, Mesen)

El-Kab (Nekheb)

Faras

Gebelein (Per-Hathor)

Heliopolis (Iunu)

Hiw (Hut-sekhem, Diospolis Parva)

Ihnasya el-Medina (Herakleopolis Magna)

Imet (Nebesha)

Kom Abu Billo (Terenuthis)

Kom el-Hisn (Imu, Momemphis)

Kom Ombo

Medjden (near Assiut)

Medjed (Deir Durunka)

Memphis (Men-nefer) 

Mirgissa

Lower Nubia (Wawat)

Philae

Punt

Qis (Cusae)

The Red Mountain

Rohesa (near Latopolis)

Sais

Serabit el-Kadim (Sinai)

Sinai

el-Sirria (Axwj)

Ta-Djeser (The Land of God)

Terraneh

Thebes (Waset)

Tihna el-Gebel (Tehne, Akoris)

Timna 

Upper Nubia (at Kalabsha)

Obviously I cannot definitely say whether these places became centres of Hathor worship because of a sighting but it is interesting to ponder. 

In conclusion the point I am making in this blog post concerns the role of the feminine divine in our modern forms of spirituality. For all the talk of family values and values promulgated by the institution of the Church in our society it feels empty and incomplete without any role for the feminine: the wife, the mother, the daughter, to play in the divine sphere. A family consisting of just a father and son do not constitute a role model for human relationships and social units. What is passed down in our western traditions are ideas about women that are thinly veiled misogynistic practices by those who fear the power of the Goddess. Her messages of kindness, love, wisdom, healing, and hope were not welcomed by the power hungry. Women in scripture are depicted as being either pure docile virgins or mischievous plotting whores who practice sorcery. Some societies veil them and treat them like second class citizens. Spiritual communities such as medieval Catholics yearned for connection with the Goddess and the laity resorted to worship of Mary that to pious observers was full on idolatry. In response, the connection to the feminine divine by breakaway Church reformers was pretty much severed. At various times in the history of mankind and his beliefs there have been reformations and renewals of beliefs. As it stands now the role of the divine in our lives is nearly empty and for future generations it will be lost. It is time to look at the damage done by the spiritual persecution of women, make amends, and restore in our beliefs the completeness of family we yearn for.