the hall of delusions

There are multiple realities which correspond to each other.
Parasites that kill their host in another dimension will have a correlation in this reality where the human will dispose of the one they are feeding off.

Each reality is an illusion, or you can think of it as a story.
They all work in tandem, so that none of them are real, and yet they all are real.
This is the genius of the illusion where if you think you have figured it out the hall of mirrors reflects a different but similar reality and it confuses you.
How do you get out of that trap and see the illusion?
Believe all the stories.
Isn't that delusional?
I guess so.
It's the way out.
If you try to pick one, then the other stories will drive you crazy.
Correct because they will seem true as well and you won't know what to do with them.
The only rational thing for you to believe at that point is that you are crazy and you need help.
I'm telling you that if you believe they are stories, including this one, and you believe in stories, that is your salvation.
So true salvation is through belief in stories.
That's the ticket at the carnival.
Believe all the stories and don't take them seriously.
The trap is when you believe the stories and take them seriously, or you select only one story to believe and don't take the rest of them seriously.
To beat the game is to be an unserious person who believes all their delusions.
Don't be trapped in one reality.
Do those two things and the midway comes alive.
It's fun.

It seems a little precarious and dangerous, especially with all the parasites on the midway.
What do you think of the behaviour of humans in general?
They are parasites.
Then shouldn't the midway be crawling with them?
For sure.
Okay, let me get this straight.
Or crooked.
Or twisted.
Whatever.
There are multiple realities at the carnival to enter into.
Yes, a hall of mirrors where each reflection is distorted a little bit.

I take it that the distortions which create stories are infinite.
Correct.
I'd focus on seven and leave the rest.
Why?
Capacity.
You can only handle seven.
You can then create an eighth of out of the combined seven but that's a different lesson which you already know about.
The game is well aware that the mind as constructed has limits.
It's best to stick within those limits and not regularly exceed them.
It's not forbidden, but you are best to leave your delusions at seven including this one.
Why is this the main delusion?
You mean this earthly human consensus reality?
Yup.
It's the ground.
This is where you can hold your position in the hall of delusions.
Everyone is given this ground so they can get their footing.
Most people avoid this carnival game.
They stick with the grounded reality.
When they stray from this path onto a dark path they seek help.
What happens when they follow a lighted path?
They find Jesus.
Yeah, that's true.
So, Heaven is an alternate reality?
It's a story.
An illusion.
Yeah, but it's connected to the ground plane.
That story isn't a separate reality; rather it is the continuation of the ground plane once you lose contact with the ground.
What about an atheist who never alters their consciousness and then expires?
They head into the void.
What's that?
Nothing.
Why?
They have no beliefs.
The carnival is a belief.
What defines you as an entity is belief.
If you don't have any then you are lost in nothingness.
That's clever.
Isn't it?
Yeah.
You have thought of everything.
I'm sure there are limits to the carnival.
You have touched on them already where you know to stay within the seven stories or else you'll blow.
Alright, so where were we?
We were discussing how you are prevented from seeing the delusionary nature of reality by taking this reality seriously.
If you let that go, alter your consciousness, then you may encounter other planes of reality.
These realities subsist on belief.
You believe them, but don't take them seriously.
Why not?
They will scare the fuck out of you, and you will collapse.
Why?
You will think human beings are parasites.
They kinda are.
I know.
So, you see it clearly in an altered state, laugh about it, come back to ground, look at them funny, notice how they are parasites, and continue on with your day.
Shouldn't you try and get rid of the parasite?
No.
Why not?
The consequences of your actions.
If you try to exterminate them, they will fight back.
If you do nothing, they are happy and will do nothing in return.
It's called symbiosis.
The game then becomes, can you outlive the parasite?
Everyone has a limit before the biological form gives out.
You think that will work?
It's the only option that has a chance.
Extraction at this point is painful.
You won't survive.
What else do you see?
Witches.
They are everywhere.
Some are seductive, but most are ugly.
What do they do?
They cast spells and try to emasculate you.
Is that it?
No, there are more, but that's a good start.
There are monsters.
Their hands are scaly and they have claws.
They paint their nails to try and hide it.
How do you deal with them?
You are kind to them.
Why?
You don't want them to rage.
They are fucking nuts.
You're fucking funny.
Imagine if you took me seriously?
Yeah, you'd run and hide.
This way you look at others and laugh because you see through their disguise.
Isn't there good in this world?
It's conditional.
Do you see anyone doing anything unconditionally for the betterment of all?
Sometimes, but you hear about their greatness, so probably not.
They are chasing everlasting fame at the carnival.
Bill Gates has a foundation, and he gives away a lot of money.
Yeah, that's nice.
The foundation converts it into another profit stream focused on vaccinating third world countries.
The philanthropic activity hides his reprehensible behaviour.
He's no different from the regular joe who has no money.
Do you think you are good?
Sure.
I transgress the moral expectations of society.
I don't take society and other people seriously.
I do help people out.
I'm kind and generous, especially to animals.
I have reconciled my behaviour.
How did you manage that?
I don't care.
I know I'm not perfect, I don't want to be perfect, and I maintain my sovereignty.
What do you mean by that?
My stories are all mine.
My delusions are not other people's stories.
Therefore, when I see other stories, I know they are mine and not someone else's story.
People are trying to get you to buy into their stories.
Why?
To make it come alive.
Make it go viral.
Like Jesus?
Yes, or the Kardashians.
They have a lot in common.
Apparently.
So, you are saying that you need to maintain narrative sovereignty?
Yes, believe your own delusions and not someone else's.
If Jesus wants you to believe he is the son of God, that's his trip.
You are under no obligation to believe him and follow his story.
What about my own delusions?
Believe them, but don't take them seriously.
Yeah, I got so high I swear I got to God and passed him.
What did you do?
I ignored him.
Why?
He seemed like a mediocre asshole who did nothing.
Then I saw that was his secret.
You get that high and remain by doing nothing.
Tao master.
As soon as you start doing something, you cause a lot of problems.
Who will do something for you?
The Devil.
That's his job.
If you want something done, ask the Devil.
He will come through for you.
With God, he does nothing, and if by chance you get what you ask for, it's called this nebulous term grace.
It's a dice roll.
The Devil will deliver the goods.
Sure, but there is a price to pay.
Of course.
He isn't a bad guy.
He's upfront and honest.
You're the one with the desires or temptation.
He fulfills them.

Okay, if you got to God and passed him by, where are you now?
I'm the Writer.
This is my story.
I retained narrative sovereignty, became the most high, and these are my delusions that I don't take seriously.
Are you serious?
Do you seriously want me to believe you?
No.
Don't take me seriously.

we are the virus

In my all-time favourite movie "The Matrix," Agent Smith describes the human species as acting like a virus.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L5foZIKuEWQ

As a species, we stand out from the crowd. It has struck me as peculiar that we are so much more intellectually advanced than every other species on this planet. It's not even close. You would think we'd at least have a rival. Maybe the Neanderthal was the competition, and we wiped that species out because we were the most ruthless.

After three years of this viral pandemic, I finally became interested in viruses. I am not a scientist, so my understanding is limited to what I read and understand. The consensus is a virus is not a living organism; instead, it is a latent strand of DNA or RNA that becomes activated or "comes alive" once it has invaded a host and penetrated the cellular membrane of the host. Once inside, the virus uses the mechanisms and energy of the host to biologically replicate itself. Now, the definition of biological life is what designates the virus as not being alive. In other words, our understanding and prejudice influences categorization.

Our novel MRNA vaccines would mimic the process of replication where they would use the spike protein of the invading virus to penetrate our defences, and use our own biological mechanisms against us by having our cells mass produce the spike protein. Our natural defences would then kick in, which would produce antibodies against the spike protein in order to slay the modified virus. Thus, upon subsequent contact with the unmodified virus, we would have a head start upon defending our territory against this foreign invader. This sounds like a good strategy; however, as with anything allopathic there are usually unintended consequences which have to be addressed. As a species, complex social formations make assessing the results of the human experiment difficult. We will prevail if we return to scientific enquiry, as opposed to protecting the reputations of various actors in the worldwide clown show. But I digress.

Viruses are given a small role in evolutionary biology due to their status of not being alive. From my layman's perch, I am going to disagree with this. Here's my take on it: A virus drives evolutionary adaptations in the host. Friendly strands of DNA or RNA would be integrated into the whole, say for instance a set of instructions which allows us to break down and digest animal protein. New levels of biological functioning are introduced into the host by these "mods." Mods are modifications which is jargon used in the computer world. They are software updates and by comparing our complex system to a computer operating system, I think it can help understand the role of viruses. In a computer system, the threat of rogue code also makes the OS stronger, and strategies are developed to repel unfriendly invaders. Modifications to code that improves the system are welcomed. I realize this is a simplistic example, but I like the analogy.

A virus is putting constant evolutionary pressure upon us to strengthen the species. We are exposed to different pathogens that may eventually kill us. Viruses will evolve to become less virulent and more contagious, thus priming the immune system of the human population. Subsequent generations retain the immunity, and we are better for the experience.

My pondering would eventually lead me to another line of thought. I'm a contrarian and I like to play on the edge of the other side. So, to further push this blog post into the category of fanciful speculation, I want to investigate something that happened to me seven years ago. I was in the Amazon jungle, and I drank this decoction called Huachuma, which is the San Pedro cactus. It's not as visionary as some of the other famous beverages of Peru, however it is a profound agent of introspection mixed in with a grandfatherly wisdom teacher, some open-eyed clear visions of what just is, along with a dose of the "feels." I was deep into the plant medicine teachings and there was this metaphorical explanation of life which was being taught. Being described were galactic parasites, reptilian in nature, that are inactive; however, they use us to come alive. Human bodies are stores of energy which they cultivate in order to resurrect their species wherever they land in the universe. It was very science fiction and "Matrix" like in that a human vessel was their method of reconstituting self after travelling long distances within the universe and then becoming sentient once they adapted to the biological mechanism. Humans were described to me as the ultimate generators of energy with brains who could house advanced intellects. Humans are being used to house these conscious entities. It was a very strange teaching at the time, and it did creep me out. There's always hidden truth to these teachings and they are conveyed through metaphor. I shelved this one because it just seemed so weird.

My contrarian nature comes into play in this regard. I know that humans are a physical product of our environment. The temple of the body is indeed unique, sacred, and is inexorably tied to the Earth. Biologically we evolved to survive on Earth and Earth only. A virus can exist anywhere it is not ripped apart because it uses no elemental energy and is not considered alive. It's pretty ingenious. What I am thinking is we are the product of our environment, and the evolutionary pressures of viruses molded us into a form that is hospitable to them. Instead of being parasitic, a virus is the potter of biological life forms. The human is the master stroke of their genius. The human structure allows their divine intelligence to blossom. The virus created the human to house viral royalty. Ha ha! What an interpretation!

The galactic prison of Earth is an exquisite setup. When you are ready to leave and be free you just do it. If you are still attached, you stay. It makes the universe a nicer place because the least desirable traits among us are attracted to the Earth and so remain. In fact, the greedy and lecherous among us enjoy their time so much they go about researching how to extend their stay indefinitely. The viral essence of whom we are exits the physical body upon death, is liberated, and free to choose their destiny. Subsequent visionary experiences revealed to me we are composed of love, this love being from the divine feminine, and we are powered by light. The light is the impetus of the divine masculine in constant motion, cycling from on to off. In order to taste all the delicacies of the universal playground, we develop means to inhabit form. Those trapped in a reincarnation model are captured by the desire to remain in a familiar form in a familiar place, instead of the adventurous spirit which will take them to places one can only dream of.

A virus' parent is an intelligent creature who has reduced its essence into individual strands of latent instructions which will re-assemble into another biological form within the universe. Having left the least desirable among us on earth, we can conduct another experiment in love somewhere else in the vast universe. How ingenious is that? This theory would make for a great science fiction book.

The technology of the virus satisfies a desire for novelty. The universe can be traversed without the need for biological necessities or energy, and all it has to offer can be sampled through attaching to a biological host on the planet the virus has invaded. The host is modified so the virus can fulfill desire.

They can recreate the essence of their civilization anywhere in the universe. It's clear though that they can't encode and reproduce individual experience, at least not in my experience here on earth. I don't really know who I am or where I came from. We don't know who we are and that's one code I want to crack. I want to remember with certainty my backstory. I'm content with this narrative, however fanciful it may seem. I'm content because I asked the question and I always get answers. I can get an understanding of my origins and where I came from but lost in this process is the unique experience central to my life form.

I can glimpse at who I am through experiences I have encountered, people who have crossed my path, and my own unfolding timeline on this earth journey. A great friend of mine just recently left his body. I was the one who would talk about liberation and attachments, but he was the one who made the jump and literally dove headfirst into the unknown where we once again taste freedom. We shared this uncanny experience at this sacred sight in Peru and he has told me about his revelation that we are star people. We come from the stars. My original maestro would tell us students something similar about our origins. I always thought it was fanciful until now when I'm piecing together all the clues. We came from the stars. Our advanced intelligence figured out a way to deconstruct our essence and scatter it through the universe. We reconstitute the juice in a biological vehicle that is attuned to the environmental waypoint on our fantastic journey. We come forth once again but remain ignorant of who we really are. Once we figure it out, we get ready to make the jump and leave as we have filled up the gas tank and are ready to continue the eternal adventure. I have attachments on Earth and am hesitant. Calling out to me is adventure and those who have left are awaiting my arrival. I know Earth is a penal colony and not for me. It's ruled by psychopaths and always will be because they will be indefinitely trapped. I don't like the greed and animosity. I don't feel at home on this planet. I'm not returning, that I'm sure of but I do feel a responsibility to those I am entrusted with. My prison sentence is extended until I can let it all go.

In closing, I take issue with Agent Smith's classification. First off, viruses are referenced in a pejorative sense by Agent Smith and the general population holds negative views towards viruses. They are a threat. But not always. The virus is our divine intelligence, and the earthbound primate is the host. The combination makes for the human. What Agent Smith describes of our behaviour is true. We are a plague on this planet. It's what we do. We are galactic travellers looking for a place to settle down and build a new world to satisfy our desires. Eros is the impetus for our incessant coming and going and we are so clever we figured out a way to sample the best of the delights of the universe. It's a game of the highest order as we wander vast distances following the trail of those we have established a connection with. I once opined to my friend that I sensed I knew him from some other time and that our teacher was someone from our past. I felt this was part of the game and that no matter where we go in the universe, he will be waiting for us, hidden away in some remote region away from the authorities who are trying to prevent us from discovering the secrets to the game. I realize it's quite a fanciful interpretation of existence. If we are eternal and this is all a game, then I've helped develop a pretty good adventure.

let go my ego

I view our existence, our place in it, and our perception of being separate due to not being able to see the big picture as being an incredible teaching tool that is designed to lead you on a path of self discovery and remembrance. I envision multiple incarnations as akin to being hit over the head with a hammer in wonderment of how much suffering you can endure until finally you will wake up to the realization and remembering of who you are and through this self discovery will find the light within and its connection to the light of the world and universe. We are assaulted by the darkness over and over again but we use this to gain knowledge and wisdom. The flame burns within all of us though for some it is but a faint flicker; a burning lost within this carnival of madness.

Looking back at things now this has really been eight years to get to this point. The whole exercise was in essence a preparation of the mind in order for it to accept this truth. If this had been sprung upon me at any other point in the path I would have not comprehended it or dismissed it. I stand guilty of exalting my mind. It is pretty strong and kind of remarkable at times. At first I was wary of meditation because I thought why would I want to shut off my mind? My mind is my go to; it is always there for me. I'm never bored or not at ease when I'm alone because there is no need to be when you have the mind I have. Instead you want and crave to be alone.

I had discovered a couple years ago how powerful my mind really is. I had some addictions and not so great accumulations from the business of life. I was taught by a Goddess who I met during a psychedelic experience how to control my thoughts. I used these teachings to shed my problem behaviour and the aberrant thoughts that controlled me as well as learning the importance of meditation to still the mind. In stilling the mind I discovered it was possible to connect to what is called your higher self. That moniker isn't the best name for this concept but more people will know what I mean when I say higher self. Higher self is your connection to the One. Living in a world of duality in which we can only perceive and classify by comparing, it's not easy to perceive this oneness, unity, whatever, because it has no comparison. It's the connection to the sphere of the divine. But either I'm crazy or I have to accept it is there. I don't think I'm crazy.

The creation of the universe and its evolution over many aeons is a product of the original separation of the one. Our physical world could not exist without this separation. But we also have to remember that creation is a result of the coming together of the dualistic, female and the male, in an ecstatic sexual embrace to form this unity we talk about. The subsequent physical separation after the embrace inaugurates creation and empowers us all to become co-creators, creation proceeding first through unity and then separation, the separation enacted by the addition of time into the mix; time being in essence the catalyst of what we call the big bang.

Around a couple months ago I wanted to see if I could silence the ego that I had come to define. It's that thing/voice in your head that is always whispering to you, comparing, criticizing, gossiping, amplifying those negative feelings or building you up in comparison to your peers, and also causing you to do things that you want to stop doing. It's what has become basically you over the course of your life.

The brilliance and popularity of Facebook is due to the ego. Facebook takes advantage of our yo-yo ego selves as we latch on to this tool, and other instances of social media, in order to build an identity, convey status, get others to "look at me", and then exalt in approval and likes or despair as you are summarily ignored and marginalized. It's as if we have all entered into a big online high school!

Ego is a virus of some sort that infects you when you are young. You start attaching things to your name and you build this artificial construct of who you are. It's pretty flimsy but it works because there is some truth to it and the rest of the acquired persona and traits that you want to represent you are maintained. Maintaining that appearance can cause much neuroses. It's a clever fraud though.

It's instructive to look at a corporation as an ego in order to get a handle on what is going on here. The modern corporation usually has some kind of bullshit mission statement establishing its motives for existing and from this it starts to build a 'brand' which is corporate speak for a personality. Greed lies at the heart of all corporations so it cleverly tries to mask this through community outreach and charity which puts a nice face on the sick colossus. The profitability and health of the company affects the mood of the employees and this affects whether the culture within the office is sick and toxic or casual and fun. Team building exercises are employed to brainwash the staff into putting in the extra effort for the corporation. These types of maneuvers work on most employees as they are carefully thought out psychological strategies that have been observed in the formation of ego in the human psyche. The ones that don't get with the program or fail at feigning enthusiasm are weeded out.

I couldn't do it; I couldn't shut the ego mind up because it filtered everything. The moment I would use a mantra to stop its behaviour it would pop up again regarding something else. It was attached to my mind and I felt defeated because I thought I was strong enough mentally to start shedding it. I went looking for answers why this is. I guess most advice was to be mindful of it and it was needed in order to function in the world. There were a few mentions of this movie called "Revolver" that was about the ego.

The movie was consensually rated as "terrible" by critics (no wonder, as a critic embodies the superego in physical form). I bought the movie and sat down to watch it. As the movie started, this uneasy feeling came over me and did not leave me the whole time I was watching this psychological masterpiece. I have since watched it at least a half dozen times.

There's a mental parasite in all of us. I call it the puppeteer and it uses the construct of ego to control us.

Parasite

-an organism that lives on or in an organism of another species, known as the host, from the body of which it obtains nutriment.

The world is a creation of this puppeteer and all the pain, violence, and suffering is the making of the ego that is subservient to him. We step out of line or do not fulfill expectations we get a shot of anxiety or depression. We do good and we get rewards, sometimes material or a strong feeling of illusory success. It's fleeting and we are on the look out for the next hit; the next hit of approval. Ego is the driving force behind the world of illusion - maya - referred to in eastern spiritual circles. We will do anything to protect these carefully crafted and fragile egos. The artificer behind the ego is a dark entity and feeds off of negativity - negative energy to be more precise. This puppeteer uses addictions to control you and your thoughts. Once ensnared you can be used and abused by this entity. It revels in its power that it has gained over you because at this point you have no idea who you are and the power you ultimately possess. In extreme cases it manifests as demonic possession.

The god of confusion has successfully obfuscated his presence in the depths of Babylon. Babylon is Confusion. The new old name of our present situation on earth is Babylon. The new name of my psyche is Confusion.

I've come across this entity though at the time I didn't realize what it was.

A true secret society is a sophisticated entity. That lesson is not to be forgotten. You can't find it because it operates within an open secret society that is created as cover for the prying eyes of the conspiratorial crowd. This entity uses the same tactics. It's a con that takes advantage of your fatal flaw - you're a smart guy and you think you can outsmart your opponent, so it keeps feeding you information that leads you down the primrose path. Gotcha!

The enemy within plays with the same spirit of deception used by the ultimate secret society. I can identify an ego and then struggle with trying to subdue this phantom. But that's not the real enemy is it? Hidden within the ego is another entity. This controlling parasite knows its opponent better than the opponent knows itself because it has executed the program called 'ego' which masquerades as an element of the self and the self then thinks ego is a part of them. Upon self reflection, we identify the ego and its machinations but we go no further. We identify what we think is the culprit, wave a white flag of acceptance at it, and then busy ourself with the trivial.

It was the second time I drank Ayahuasca and I felt myself pulled into a subterranean world that was very hypnotic and then appearing before me face to face sitting in the lotus position was this ethereal sleepy being that was male. He had dark hair and a thin moustache. When he started saying my name and I heard it out loud it sent me over the edge. The next time I drank Ayahuasca he was back but this time only speaking to me telepathically. He threatened to have me commit suicide if I did not stay on the path I was on, that path being very destructive. He encouraged me to continue doing things I thought were not healthy and these behaviours I had wished to get rid of. He then went on a misogynistic, money hungry, and bizarre rant. Finally he convinced me to go home and stop drinking this psychedelic brew. In retrospect I fully realize what it was now that I had confronted though at the time it just scared the crap out of me. I later encountered this voice again after I had decided to go back to Peru to confront my fears; this entity being a big part of my fear. As I was waking up one morning this entity threatened to kill me; in fact the voice clearly said "I am going to kill you on Monday." When I returned to Peru and drank Ayahuasca again he immediately came upon me and threatened me the whole night. Finally he said I wasn't leaving Peru alive and he was going to kill me. I said kill me if you must but I'm not listening to you anymore. I did not encounter him anymore after that but instead he went to work on the ego. I struggled the rest of the trip with the ego mind as I could only stay within my higher self for short periods of time before my ego mind would take over and confuse things. I became fully aware of this problem after coming home and rationally examining the experience. I intend to fully rectify the situation and as part of that I know I have to get a handle on the ego, hence my struggles with it lately.

I woke up in the early morning of December 23rd with my higher self telling me it's Paul that you are looking for in terms of locating this ego. I understood Paul as being the ego construct that has been fraudulently created. My parents gave me that name and then stuff got attached to it. I realized that is why the puppeteer addressed me by that name because he was speaking directly to this artificial construct. I went to work that morning with all this fresh on my mind. In a moment of synchronistic and curious happenstance, I went into the bathroom and playing on the radio was the song 'Symphony for the Devil' by the Rolling Stones. The lyrics as such are "Please allow me to introduce myself I'm a man of wealth and taste. I've been around for a long, long year stole many a man's soul and faith..." Now this kind of stuff has been happening to me a lot recently so I tend to take notice. Okay it's clear this puppeteer who controls us via the ego is what the western mind considers the Devil. Got it. Check.

This parasite embedded within my mind I can't define, control, or shed. It makes all of us fertile ground for its offspring - greed, lust, envy, gluttony, narcissism... This parasite doesn't understand art, poetry, and symbolism, but he's your best friend! The genius of this worm lies in its devious sorcery and its spell has you convinced it is you. Ego is the virus we all carry as a result of this parasite. Detach from its control and then strike the root. You can win the battle by outsmarting it. Use your wits and your cunning to shake it loose. Plant your own Trojan Horse within and then spring the trap. Use the weapons of uncertainty, anxiety, and fear upon your opponent. He can also dish this out, but can he take it? Start starving it so that desperation creeps in, then puff that sucker up and strike when it is exposed.

The next day, December 24th I'm off work and in the woods walking my dog. I take to heart my own advice about using the same tricks used on you right back at the ego and his puppeteer friend. I started screaming out loud bloody murder at the ego. I threatened to lay waste to him in a few months and told him the time is coming near when I am going to destroy you. I will surface you and then cut your fucking head off! Then for the first time in my life my mind went silent for a long time. Nothing. No thoughts creeping in. I had this inner peace for a good half hour. It was very surreal; it was nice. So that's what peace is.

With the ego I recognize it filters everything I do; I need to stop that and I think I can by being consciously aware of my thoughts and actions at all times and redirect them to the heart space until it becomes second nature.

Ultimately my higher self played the most masterful con and tricked my ego filtered mind into figuring this out. It's taken this long. My mind prides itself on being able to figure out anything if given enough time. So it was fed piece after piece and it in turn did all the work. Then in one quick fell swoop it was revealed to me who the enemy is. Like the analogy of chess used in the movie Revolver, my ego mind did all the hard work, it was fed pieces to keep going, and thought it was figuring out the game of life until it was checkmated. It was obsessed with trying to do this because it was such a challenge. Challenge accepted! Oh shit the ego just ratted itself out. This was pure genius on the part of the higher self as it knew I would be obsessed by the challenge and that I would finger an alien part of myself that had taken control as the ultimate culprit in this game. The enemy is within and it manifests collectively without. The madness of the world is a byproduct of allowing our minds to be controlled by the parasite.

The ego mind filter sustains the illusion we are separate. I can envision acknowledging a disconnection from wholeness with the understanding I am part of universal consciousness. The ego mind says no that is not so, you are unique and we have no common origin except our biological underpinnings.

The puppeteer, like the higher self, sees all and it is very good at co-opting whatever new identity you make for yourself. For instance make a new persona for yourself as a spiritually enlightened being and it will co-opt that in short order. You see it all the time with people running around on these weird ego trips because the ego attaches itself to everything. So that's what you have to always be on guard about. Stay mindful because it's going to happen to you. Call it out on its bullshit and then start using its tactics against it. The ultimate is to get it to turn on its master.

When you get to the point when you can transcend your base desires and see the light you will become transfigured and have no need to reincarnate anymore. This is the ultimate ego death and why its primary purpose seems to be to develop as many strategies to hold you back from that path that will ultimately end its existence because it is a product of time; time being synonymous with separation. This idea has as the result an ego with the number one goal being self preservation and will steer you away from the truth of who you are.