stories

I am locked in a life puzzle where I'm trying to figure out the reason why something happened. Given enough time I can run through the gamut of possibilities and this exhaustive search also contains the part where I let go of my bias and see the situation free of my own denials. I then can whittle down the possibilities to say four reasons why the situation unfolded in the manner it did. After this process I use my inner computing power to select a reason. I'm aware there're other influences on that reason which may include the other candidates, but this satisfies my inquiry.

I practice a form of meditation called mindfulness where I just clear my mind and let the thoughts come to me. I try not to spin them but just observe. This process is valuable because the answers with the strongest vibration are what makes it through the noise. When I did this with the life puzzle at hand, the vibrations that made it through presented the different scenarios as the answer. We are conditioned to only accept one answer and discard the rest. This creates our reality.

Where this got fun is I chucked my preconceived notions of reality. The use of psychedelic drugs has expanded my consciousness and within this awareness is a grasping of different planes of reality. These different frequencies of manifestation all deal with the same energy with the caveat being the energy is perceived in a different form on each level. So, if at one level Goddess and God are separated, in our level this means creation flourishes. If at one level God remains asleep, then at this level our universe continues as it is but a dream. When he wakes up then we will be witness to the destruction of our world. If God wakes up slowly, we will observe little pockets of the calamity to come until he gets out of bed and the world blows up. I don't know how many levels there are. I've read about seven but one thing I have learned on my fantastic voyage is to verify everything through experiential means. In other words, don't take anyone's word for it. If I experience it, then I will try to bring that back into my world using words to try and understand it. I have been witness to a level where all is one. Undifferentiated and within is contained all possibilities. A level below that is Goddess and God. The first pair. I see them as serpent and jaguar. From these two is created a child who is Eros. Desire then makes our world come alive. A frequency below my world is a realm of mystery and magic. So, that's five I count.

That's a way I make sense of what I have experienced and have no expectations anyone will accept or care about what I have come to understand. It should be that way because you need to experience this yourself. Where things got interesting for me lately is in the way of perspective. So, I can be witness to multiple planes of reality, but I also started to realize that within my normal frequency of perception there are multiple ways to interpret the presentation of events. If I change my perspective viewpoint, I can see the answer differently. This means that all the possibilities I considered are true depending on how I approach the situation. I saw multidimensional reality within a container that also is multidimensional. The only way to gain temporary understanding is to compartmentalize because the possibilities are endless if you don't. If you aren't selective, you will just drive yourself crazy. There is a need to settle on an interpretation and then focus on an answer based on that reality.

I recently started to figure this out. I knew I had to heal the hurt in parallel dimensions and then it would make sense. At the time it didn't make sense. The viewpoint I had made created a lack of understanding. The fissure is multidimensional. I needed to alter my vibration and be open to the knowledge that pours in. Why is this happening? What is the reason as revealed in a higher dimension?

I used to laugh at the airhead new agers when they would talk about frequencies and dimensions. It's different since my last trip to Peru. The flighty were witness to it but couldn't articulate the experience without sounding like they were nuts and full of woo. I should be able to explain it. I think this explanation will encompass why things are happening here at this level.

I now know how to change my vibration and enter different dimensions of energy, creating multiple dramas. I have made that my intention when working with plants and the experience was surprising in that I was going to be patient. They say patience is a virtue and thus I'm the most virtuous person in the world. I can have the patience of a saint though I freely admit I have put myself in situations where that patience is a silent killer. I want a resolution now and to get on with things! I internalize this and wait, sometimes dying a slow death. So, in this case I wasn't expecting the answer right away but as with a lot of my seeking I already had the knowledge and the answer. It was just a matter of remembering and applying the answer to my question.

When I first drank Ayahuasca I realized it was through changing vibration that I accessed obfuscated forms of consciousness. The Great Goddess even told me so. After frightening myself, I eventually returned to the Great Goddess, and she let me into her castle made of gold. She was locked away in this fortress; a prisoner of her husband the dragon. I wondered why she would marry such a monster? She sent me away to slay the dragon and I dutifully obeyed. My quest revealed to me that I was the dragon. It's really a multidimensional story when you have a hard think about it. I did the work, opened my heart, and freed the Goddess.

Adapting to a way of thinking multidimensional is cool because I can accept all answers to the life problem I faced. They are all valid and I was satisfied with that knowledge because I saw in each solution kernels of truth and now, I don't have to toss out any of these theories. Within the tight frequency I operate in, there are multiple stories emanating from them. I'm free to pick which story I want to craft my reality. I must admit at this stage of my level of consciousness exploration the supernatural one is a good drama. This gives my life adventure and thrills. Within this life event I saw this drama play out, but I kept it on the periphery because it isn't accepted in our world. It's a flight of fancy. The thing is I saw it go down in real time. I wrote about it and I knew it was true. When my life story spiraled out into a crash, I let that story go and clung to a more mainstream idea of why I experienced the failure I did. I'd like to revisit that and re-write the chapter. I'm going to draft a magic story. This should be fun. Here it is.

A crack in reality opens the door. Once I get a glimpse or a small look into the nature of something it becomes a matter of time before the dam breaks. You see this with the collective human intellect throughout history. Once we get a small understanding of something, eventually it will blossom into revealing the inner workings of the universe. In my personal exploration of the subconscious, a small bit of understanding will reveal itself fully in the days to come.

The epiphanies come out of the blue and lately I've requested them. I wanted more knowledge, so I asked. How about this one: Life experiences are clues to the game. The major happenings in your life have the most potential to awaken you though not always. Sometimes I've gone about this in the wrong order. I've understood spiritual concepts and then it unfolded within my life. I saw the separation of Goddess and God on a higher plane of consciousness and realized this separation was the impetus behind creation. The divorce created duality and the fruit from their union was a child who is the universe. In my little life on earth, I searched for the Goddess and found her. I couldn't hang onto her and she left me again. The clues all align. The coming child calms the dragon, so he won't destroy the world.

My experience in this lifetime reveals I've done a similar journey. The goal of my spiritquest was to find her and then see if you are ready to solve the puzzle and beat the game. I can now get to the point in the game where I know how to find her, get in her presence, and have a relationship with her. I haven't figured out how to beat the game. She always leaves. I got really close this time. I think I know the answer. It's because the goal of the game is to make her mine and that's what drives her away. The goal of the game is different than what I think it is. My block is to do with possession as opposed to an equal partnership.

It's a startling video game analogy I'm dealing with. Do I use my available health to continue and try to get past this level that keeps tripping me up? I drove her away. I don't know if it is even possible or if I have made the game impossible now. If it is impossible then I'm going to destroy the world. I'll hit reset on the gaming console. I'll blow it up next year and start the game again. I'll have to get to the point where I find her again and somehow not screw that one up. I'm surprisingly good at the game now, so I can find her around pyramids but then I must try something different. I've put so much time into this life I must exhaust the possibilities before I hit reset.

The above is a good story. We all tell stories. It's how we make sense of the world. In my current life situation, I have about five stories on the go to find an answer for why things are happening the way they are. Then I'll watch a TV program or read something on the internet that has a connection to the events I've experienced, and I'll weave into the drama the latest ideas I have come across. I just did it and laughed. I whispered to myself, "stories." Magic can be fulfilled by getting another to lock to your story. It's a huge clue into the inner workings of magic and not surprising it took a lifetime to see it. I have been aware our lives are a story we tell ourselves and that so much of society is based on getting you to buy into the dominant narrative. It's constant. I see with incredulity why it is done. That's all we have at the end of the day. A story. So, guess what? I have a good story I want to write. The drama is going to be phenomenal.

I'll call it the sorcerer and the witch of the north.