When I read messages people post about finding your true self I always stop and try to answer the question, "What is my true self?" It's common that those on the spiritual path insist their true self doesn’t include the parts of them they don’t like or the carefree pleasure seeker. Instead, it is a perfect image of themselves crafted from the positive feedback of others. They are enlightened and figuratively running through a field of flowers with the midday sun shining directly down upon them.
Spiritually fingering the ego as the bad guy allows you a scapegoat so you can transfer blame instead of taking responsibility for your mess. If that isn't enough, then fingering desire as the devil who made you do it is continuing to be in denial. Not identifying with the chattering voice in your head allows you to claim you are in touch with your true self; whatever the fuck that is.
I did all this so though I might sound sanctimonious, I'm actually making fun of myself.
You will never sort through this mess and find peace if you insist you are splintered and can transcend yourself. You can't bypass the human and you have to recognize and come to terms with it all. You are loving, you are a rascal, you can't be trusted, you are incredibly giving, you have questionable thoughts, motives, plus occasionally you scarf down a whole pizza. Yes, that's you! Which one is your true self? Oh, it's the loving and giving one, that's really me. Fuck off, it is all you.
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