slowing down duality

There is something to the Freudian concept that everything we do is related to the sex drive and positioning us in a way to fulfill our sexual desires. We strive to attain power in order that we may have the ability to choose whatever partner we please and control that partner's behaviour. Equally valid is one who wants to relinquish power to another because of the sexual thrill that state enables. I think you can make an argument that this may be a little too overreaching and I think if you removed the sexual part of it then it is a little closer to the truth as in it is really desire fulfillment that makes the world go around. This is demonstrably true as in the world is the product of our desire and whole classes of religious or spiritual activity, such as Buddhism, stress how it is through non-attachment and the eschewing of desire that we can transcend our condition of suffering. One soon learns that you must give up pleasure and rewards in order not to suffer and thus the dilemma. If you desire not to desire then as a result you cease to be human and will soon lose the desire to even go on.

I was thinking about this because it had a relationship to the blog post I wrote concerning the creator and destroyer. Fundamentally there are two powers in the universe: the feminine and the masculine. One of them creates and the other destroys thus enabling all of creation and allowing it to fundamentally keep renewing itself in a never ending cycle. One power can’t exist without the other and though each tries to get the upper hand, the ability to become dominant will lead to its inevitable decline and the rise of the other power. If we create too many things, the sheer volume will eventually choke out others and the result will be destruction and when the death has played itself out then from the ashes will arise new life. It is a harmonious relationship that sometimes might seem cruel and I am finding it at work in all aspects of life, much like a Freudian would see the phallus present in every guise.

I have noticed the older I get the more conservative I become and I have recently discovered it is because I see the life force of my body dwindling and the eventual destruction of my figure getting near. My knees are aching. To counter balance this escalating condition I want to hang on to what I had and from this conservatism comes in to play. I don’t want change anymore. Change is killing me! I am channeling the preserver and trying to find balance in between the two polarities. From the standpoint of my personal philosophy, I never really wanted to upset the system but instead I was a proponent of libertarianism whereby I believed people should be free to do whatever they wish as long as it is not harming others, within reason of course. We probably should stop at red traffic lights. I still hold these views but what is interesting is despite all efforts of media and social engineering projects to steer me towards feel good socialism, my internal reaction is to move politically further away from them; this reaction despite knowing that unity of the species is our only hope. There’s a power and control dynamic within these movements I am not comfortable with; I know they are not headed towards the unity I seek but instead are power grabs cloaked in equity, and the mob and groupthink paradigms I have avoided throughout my life as they curtail free speech, breed authoritarianism, and not at all freedom. Current events are just doubling down on this and expediting my move towards the right. I think I’m not the only one who feels this way.

What is fascinating in all of this are I believe these forces we are witnessing are derivative of the concept of the creator and destroyer. Each power needs a tremendous outpouring of energy in order to come forth and then once established would necessarily become conservative in order to consolidate and preserve their position. Look at America: it was rebellious and destroyed the oppression of the monarchy of Great Britain and these revolutionaries established this amazing country; though probably not so amazing if you are one of the indigenous peoples whose way of life was being destroyed. The USA grew and became the world’s foremost power at the peak of its strength but playing up against that position now comes the eternal check on its power. The forces of destruction seek to lay claim to its many sins. The destroyers of the left see no redeeming qualities but instead seek to fundamentally change its economic system and way of life and threaten to do so by methodically destroying all of America’s institutions through violence and cultural revolution. The sins of America are systemic and the only way to cleanse it of these transgressions is to bring down the whole edifice is the claim. This is the eternal struggle between the creator and destroyer and is predestined to play out in order to keep it all moving along. Where is it written that a pocket of civilization will last forever? How does America meet this challenge? How do I meet my own challenge as I finally can see my demise in the rear-view mirror? I eat better, get more sleep, exercise, and prioritize what is important to me and what I want to accomplish in this lifetime. It should keep the forces of destruction at bay for a while longer now. Eventually they will return again stronger and come at me once more. It’s a game now where I see how long I can hold them off. Perhaps that is the future of America as well.