harmonious unity

Unity is a return to the darkness and ultimately to death. A return to the valley after coming forth as an individual. When you think about it, coming forth into the light is the separation from unity. Light is the great separator. Climbing the mountain of enlightenment to become the most high is taking the light to the extreme. It becomes blinding light and because it is so bright it is a perverse form of unity where you see that everything emanates from you but you can’t see anything else. Blindness from an overbearing light. You are it and the it from which the whole universe emanates. Of course we don’t realize this potentiality is in everyone and that's a bit of a trap with the possibility of spiritual inflation thinking you are the only one. You can't expect to stay on the top of the mountain and continue to shine and grow or wait to be whisked away into heaven to join the all star enlightenment team. Coming down the mountain is just as instructive as climbing the mountain, in fact it is greater and more pleasurable. There's no more struggle to get to the top and you can take your time coming back down the slope. At the bottom is where you will find once again what you have been looking for; your sisters and brothers, and you can encourage them to climb the mountain so that they too will discover what they were looking for they had all along. The cosmic joke however is that you'll never find it until you look for it everywhere except within.

I wonder if the blinding light is the condition that fools god into getting his idea of being the one and only god from? A complete feeling of separation and omnipotence, blind to the inheritance of every sentient being? An exaltation of self taken to the extreme with airs and graces, plus a big celestial throne for you to sit on. A realization you are god and then not wanting anyone else to realize they are god too would be the origin of monotheism! So you form a religion exalting yourself as god and everyone must worship you! You're the king! Okay maybe that’s taking things too far. Sort of... but you know all of our monolithic religions are righteous masculine paths. They are right hand paths that focus on individual salvation. The monotheistic ones all have a domineering male god on top of the mountain lording it over others with his holy righteousness. Well, Jesus breaks the mold a little with his talk of love and community. He tends to hang around with a bunch of women named Mary, as well as devoted disciples, and he is kind of wishy washy and effeminate, but in the end he is good for attendance. So he’s kicked upstairs to limit the damage, and thus tolerated.

I’m in my own game, a product of this independent streak within that don't need no one's help! I have created the adventure and immersed myself in it. I have wandered multiple paths, through many lives, and many parts that I have played. I’m waking up and realizing where I am. I had convinced myself the game was real as I am the ultimate thespian who dabbles in self hypnosis.

We are waves of energy that have branched off from the fount. Our bodies are an expression of the energy in a harmonious relationship with our environment. There is the crest and trough of the energetic wave. As our energy crests, we experience the self. In the light of existence we all shine as individuated points of the source. The great conundrum is the popular esoteric teaching that the self does not exist is only true if you understand it does exist. It is impermanent, it both exists and doesn't exist depending on the wave. Existence you can't pin down as it is always changing. To try and pin it down you need time but time is our peculiar way of recognizing motion. The motion of energy is creating waves and I come forth as the crest of a wave, being light that illuminates and separates, giving a temporary feeling of being an individual in a mass sea of separate beings. At the trough of the wave I return to the darkness and non separation where my wave crashes onto the beachhead and returns to the all once again. I become the ocean. It's hard to imagine or even admit to, but I am it, I have come forth, conveniently forgetting the all part, and in this eternal dance of energy I will yet again return to omnipotence. Little old me, this nobody on this remote watery planet, god, if you will. Crazy but true. Everything throughout life I have loved and I have hated, it's all me. I want to Love myself when I return to the trough. There are parts of me I love and miss dearly. I want to bring my light into the darkness and I want to integrate my darkness into the light. Harmonious Unity. Tao.