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Monday, August 1, 2022

meditating on forgiveness

In the early 18th century, the English poet Alexander Pope wrote, “to err is human, to forgive is divine.” The phrase is a recognition of our fallibility and then taking it a step further to see how this is inherent in all of us. To honestly look at oneself reveals we err all the time and thus forgiveness encapsulates self and the other. Walking within spiritual circles demands you encounter the idea of forgiveness, with the call to practice forgiveness of self before forgiving others.

The exercise of forgiveness will open your heart and the process is baked into the cards if you walk the path. What I mean is if you open your heart the result is heading directly towards forgiving. Back in 2015, I used cactus medicine called Huachuma to break open my rusted out and closed heart. I had forgotten what it was like to love and was closed off to ever becoming engulfed in love again. I could have momentary feelings of bonding and compassion; however, the idea of becoming a being of love was foreign to me. I had drunk this heart medicine and blasted open my heart while we were in a boat on the Amazon River. The feeling was so strange, and this bliss washed over me. I looked at everyone and felt so much love. Tears streamed down my face, and I felt absolved of blame for all my wrongdoings in life and I wanted everyone to share in this awesome feeling. A great teaching of Huachuma is that the wisdom plant will take you to the highest highs or the lowest lows if you engage the mind. When you disengage, the beauty of the world becomes an inherent surety. Being a novice, I yo-yoed between mind states. I did recognize the cosmic love I experienced and when I went back the next year for more teaching, one of my primary reasons was to experience that cosmic love again and work towards living my life that way.

Well, years have passed since those experiences and my heart is definitely open and engaged, though the goal of living with an open heart all the time has not yet been accomplished. Apparently, for most transformation is a process!

When I look at my own life it becomes easy to forgive others. I'm not proud of some things I have done, and I see the connection between acts of a dubious nature which allow you to get what you want and suffering. The relationship between desire and suffering is clear cut.

There’s something mystical about the whole attachment gambit that I’m starting to understand. If you somehow give up all attachments, you will exit the illusion. What holds you down in this vibratory plane is attachment and the number one culprit is desire. Desire is the easy scapegoat and throughout our daily life you can see how our wants keep us engaged whether it is a simple pair of shoes in the window of a store at the mall or the chance glimpse at the pretty girl on the street.

Letting go and forgiving is a step towards liberation. The reason I remain in hell is because I'm attached to hell. I'm attached to my identity and ego. I'm attached to my actions. I'm attached to others' actions. I can see it. If I let go of how I think others have wronged me or what they think of me then the power they have to keep me attached to identity dissolves away. A big secret is your fellow game players keep you here in their game by telling you who you are. You believe them and become trapped in the many illusions of self.

Not only is forgiveness divine, but it is liberating. Practicing forgiveness will release you from the hell that you have constructed. It works. See for yourself. Start forgiving those who have wronged you and see their hold over you fall away.

The game goes further than simple cords that bind in that the heart will attach to all. Left to her own devices, the heart will be smothered in the suffering of the world. The role of the divine masculine is to armor the heart and lift her up to the throne, allowing her to shower all with love. She is the way out of the suffering, with the caveat the suffering is the impetus that will lead you to your heart.

The game as constructed is exquisite.

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