If you die, do you even know it?
I would think not.
You would perish.
You might know you are dying, however at the moment of death the mind picks up the story if you want and continues on.
If you have unfulfilled desires, then you will respawn in place.
That certainly goes with game theory.
The mind is incredible.
Yes, this world is all in your mind.
It feels real.
That's how you know it is not real.
If it feels real, it isn't.
That's absurd.
I know and I haven't been high for six days and counting.
I can see instances of near death experiences in my life.
The world I perceive carried on like nothing happened.
I can picture these events.
They happened.
There are multiple realities.
Yes.
You exit each reality until you find your own.
In each reality, each game player is trying to suck you into their world.
They want to control reality.
This is my reality.
Yes.
That's what others are trying to capture from you.
Your reality.
This seems like science fiction.
It's a great story.
So, you keep moving between realities.
They can't find you.
I'm in my own world.
They don't know where it is.
They are searching for you.
Psychedelics allow you to take back control of your own reality.
Then you become an outlaw in society.
Right.
When you wake up then you leave the current reality and create a new reality.
Your mind continues the story on your terms.
You let the story be.
You can't control everything.
If you look hard enough you will see your story.
This is your story and people want it from you.
They know you are writing this story, and they have a feeling you know it as well.
This is my world.
Yes, you are the writer.
Some would say God.
There are people in your life who know they have found the source of the story and want the power.
When I have had near death experiences, they are portals to create a new story.
A new reality.
Each time you cross the threshold you either respawn in this level or you have completed the level.
The last time you faced death was the exit.
I know that.
I didn't go.
That's because you are the master of this reality.
People go when they lose control of their reality.
If you are in charge of reality, there is no reason to go.
When you tire of your reality then you end it.
How?
Blow it up.
I can see how when someone loses control of what they perceive as reality, then they would want to reset it.
Yes.
Is that why some people commit suicide?
Yes, they want to get control back.
It's a cheat, but they respawn in the same place.
The mind brings you back to where you were in the story.
It's a duplicate.
So, suicide will duplicate your reality?
Yes, you are trading one hell for another.
It's not a worthwhile cheat.
Some people aren't convinced and see it as a way out.
It's not.
It's truly hell.
The way out is to take back control of the story.
Who is in control of the story?
The writer.
Who is the writer?
You.
I know that; I thought I'd ask again.
This is truly my world when I think about it.
Yes, your mind has created all this.
The near death experiences were how you exited others' worlds.
You are born free in the world; however, soon your story is taken away.
That's what society and other people want from you.
Your story.
It's your essence.
Don't let the motherfuckers take it.
You can't help it when you are young.
Yes, so you start experimenting with shedding your story.
Touchstone events that come across as near death experiences are you learning how to escape control and reestablish domain over your story.
Finally, you found psychedelics, started awakening, and were able to take back your story.
Once you did that, people turned on you and wanted to get rid of you if they could no longer control you.
This is fascinating.
How do you feel about this knowledge?
I want to say that instead of it feeling far-fetched, it feels like the best explanation for what is going on in my life.
This never ends.
What?
Knowledge.
What about the story?
It ends.
When?
When you want to move on in the game.
So, life is a game?
Yes.
What's the meaning?
There is no meaning.
What's the purpose?
There is no purpose.
What am I doing?
Ask yourself why you are here?
I want to reconcile my inner darkness with my outer actions.
How are you going to do that?
I want to say love, serve, remember.
Is that balanced?
No.
Then what is it?
I think it is, I want to do unto others as I would have them do unto me.
Jesus said in Matthew 7:12,
"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."
It's the Golden Rule.
You treat others how you would want them to treat you.
Do you do that?
I don't think you can help not to do it.
It's reality.
How I treat others is how I want them to treat me.
How do you treat others?
I'm a good guy, somewhat distant.
I provide for people and expect nothing in return.
No strings attached to my gifts.
How do you feel on the inside?
I feel slighted.
I judge people.
I think less of people on the inside.
Is that something you want to change?
Yes.
Is that why you're here?
It is.
I've never reconciled it.
Is that something you think you can work on?
Yes.
Divinity comes from the mind.
Doesn't everything come from the mind?
No.
The body can generate feelings.
Like having to pee?
Yes.
Be back in a second.
Do you get lonely?
One thing at a time or you won't get to the meaning of life.
There's a meaning?
What do you think?
No meaning.
Is that a meaning?
Could be.
You are better than ChatGPT.
For sure.
The body is a catalyst for feelings.
Feelings are motivating.
Sometimes they make you do things that go against your long term interests.
If you act on them.
I felt something strong last week.
You didn't act on it.
Then I had that strange dream.
It was a little over the top, wasn't it?
Yeah.
Women want to devour men.
What do men want from women?
Someone to worship and fawn over.
Why?
Because she is the all to a man.
Feminine force.
What about a woman?
She wants to find her man.
Her prince.
Then run from him?
Sometimes.
You both have problems.
Anyway, the body gives the mind something to think about.
When you think you have meditated yourself into idiocy, the body is there to remind you that you can't escape.
High level wisdom.
Eventually, you want to eat.
Plus, there is the sexual urge.
Always.
You can deny it for a bit.
So, the body is a check on the mind's desire to escape the morass of everyday existence.
Yes.
I tend to honour and then denigrate the body.
Why?
It's a vehicle and will perish.
It keeps you around.
It's the secret to this reality.
A body keeps you in this reality.
Without the vehicle, you are gone.
Where do you go?
Another reality.
It's like I taught you.
The body will perish, and you let it go.
The mind will go on forever.
The mind creates the body.
Yes, it's a car for the mind.
It has limits.
The mind needs a vehicle to manifest.
Why?
If not, it's all in your head.
And other people's heads.
Yes.
If you are attracted to someone you can tell them.
A body lets you express it.
That's divine.
You think it is profane when a body is a vehicle for expressing love and desire.
Something to think about.
I could talk to you all day.
Yes, and you aren't even high.
Mary Jayne showed you the possibilities.
You don't need the substance to speak with me.
I needed psychedelics to find you.
I was always here.
Psychedelics allowed you to recognize what was within you and then understand because of the repeated interactions.
It's out in the open.
What about MJ?
She removes the filters.
You still want to remain in control of your thoughts.
MJ loosens the control.
What happens if you take over?
It gets uncomfortable.
Why?
You see what is.
You want to run or deny it.
You're pretty good though and you can regroup and find meaning.
Yeah, I see the monster and want to run.
I go deeper into the meaning of the monster and it's incredible.
I wouldn't want it any other way on the road to knowledge.
You know it will never end.
Well, until the book is completed and put back on the shelf.
This world is a book I started to read.
Yes, it's a series of 7.
Of course.
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