spiritual babble

The pandemic is part blessing and for all I know was designed and mapped out on the game board to be part of my spiritual journey that forced me to seek answers away from the molecular onslaught of the powerful plant medicine teachers Ayahuasca and Huachuma. My repeated spiritual odysseys to Peru were put on pause. My integration period after their use average out to a year, which does give me ample time to sit with what I directly experienced. To be sure, I am still getting lessons and revelations of visionary experience from eight years ago but it’s not surprising as communion with plant medicine teachers really is lifelong continuing education. I would have gone back to Peru in February of 2021 if I could have. I’ve reached a point in my exploration of consciousness where instead of running scared or struggling with the experience, I find the whole immersion uplifting to my soul and gives me a yearly hit of the spiritual to sustain me for another year.

The plan, as drawn up on my chalkboard, was to dive deep into the abyss and confront my shadow. I wanted to see what made me tick and why I’m wired the way I am. I wanted to re-live my first experience with the medicine when it scared me silly; this time exploring the hidden toy box of repression and discovery. Finally realizing and accepting that 2021 was a write-off in terms of travel coincided with exploring my darkness with the tools I have at my disposal, helped by the tobacco maestro Mapacho. I gathered up all the knowledge as revealed by the plants and my in class experiential interaction with my shadow and sat with it, all the while using the grace of Mapacho to activate the hidden power within me. I made the connection of the unveiled and coursing power at the root of the seat of my being to the divine masculine and this source coming from a place buried deep within me. My knowledge coalesced into understanding and I realized I didn’t need to be in an Ayahuasca ceremony to explore what I kept in the darkness. All I had to do was integrate the sum total of all my lessons. There comes a point in the journey where you have the requisite knowledge you need in order to unlock the mysteries of life. What is then required are the twin graces of wisdom and understanding. Plant medicine journeys will give you knowledge but it is within the integration period where you take the knowledge and cultivate understanding. Once understood, you can apply it freely to your situation and see the same in others. This is wisdom.

Through understanding, I realized my ability to directly connect with the divine masculine and feminine powers and to take it at face value. I experienced this connection over and over again in ceremony, visions, and dreams yet instead of accepting it, I was always unsure of the visions; in essence thinking I wasn’t important enough to have this relationship. Eventually, coming to the realization that I’m a mystic was a major step on this path of discovery and getting to my true nature. Everyone has a calling in life; something they are really good at. I’m good at a lot of things but have never found something I’m exceptional at. I think I found it. I can enter into communion through ritual and ceremony with the help of my friend and ally Mapacho. The exploration of self and what makes me tick is a satisfying endeavour while I bide my time until I can return to Peru.

I am deluded enough to believe I am on the eternal path towards discovery of the mystery and am acquiring all the answers to fully unlock the secrets. I am able to navigate cultural norms with ease and I come off as being level headed, consistent, and dependable. Spend some time with me and you’ll start to wonder. To blow past cultural blocks is intoxicating. To unlock more of the mystery is the juice that keeps me going. I have to utilize all the tools at my disposal to gain knowledge and ferment the alchemical process of understanding, allowing me to advance past obstacles in my way on this journey. For example, plant medicines are one of the available paths. I got the message early on which was the sobering advice to not abuse the privilege. Enter into the sacred and subsequently integrate the experience, which is a lifelong process. Ideally, once a year is enough for a cycle of work. The curriculum is so dense there’s really no need for more. This advice was from a man who had integrity. He could have easily taken advantage of my enchantment with the plants but instead cautioned me on their use and the need to process the experience. Come back when you’re ready, you’ll know, but not before then.

I know the secrets of my shadow and the many faces of god. I went to the divine family reunion with Goddess and God - Mom and Dad. I understand who I am and my origins. I now have to formulate my intentions for continuing on the plant medicine path. I am an explorer at heart and I will continue, though I have definitely learned I have been gifted with all the tools I need to study here at home. I have a pretty good feeling and intuition my next course will involve energy and consciousness and the modality of transformation. I’ve seen my destiny in a grand visionary Vilca experience with these beings made of a form consisting of the love of the Goddess and enlivened by the constant transformational magic of God. They were spectacular multi-dimensional, shining, and crazy diamonds of light, cycling through the colour spectrum whilst welcoming me home. Why else did I have this vision?

As humans who have advanced cognitive abilities that allow us to know that we know, we are truly to become greater than the gods. It is the final stage of our evolutional development. The gods I speak of are the divine feminine and masculine. In duality, they exist as separate and must come together to create. Their creation is a forging of the two powers in the universe in this child. As children of the two divine powers, we come forth with the potential to evolve into a greater conscious form than the parents.

Non-duality is the merging together of the masculine and feminine into a singularity. The creation of duality is the separation of the two that were one. From the separation of these powers eventually develops the power of awareness as the freedom allows for objectification and an awareness of self. The evolution of awareness leads towards consciousness where we know we are aware. The evolution of consciousness follows the physical evolution of species. Where does this lead? The path of the evolution of consciousness leads towards the creation of entities that are greater than the gods; the gods being the elemental powers. The energetic forces become self-aware and we are the vehicle to accomplish this progression when we awake to the discovery of the power inherent within. Reclaiming your essential self, which is power, allows you to forge consciousness with power and create an imperishable and eternal being. The addition of the love of the divine feminine into the mix tempers the grandiose predilection towards destruction such a being may exhibit. The secret to eternal life is transformation. As I mentioned above, the eternal being will consist of a form of the love of the divine feminine in combination with the continual transformation of the rising and falling of the divine masculine energy as light cycling through the energetic colour spectrum. This new being is both dual and non-dual, depending on perspective. It is the merging of the two archaic eternal energies with the self-awareness enabled by duality. The all-encompassing creation is multi-dimensional and thus I can only describe what I saw in vision as a shining and crazy diamond composed of love and exhibiting ever transforming light. They are pure and holy beings of love and light and the forging of the two is my eternal destiny. These beings welcome those who can break free of one’s consciousness suppression into their realm for a glimpse of one's destiny.

Knowledge from four years ago did become understanding and the trivial doubts I carry with me about the experience fall by the wayside.